Wife slams husband for revealing fertility truth to her mother

Picture: Getty Images
Picture: Getty Images 

A man has found himself in an awkard pickle after revealing a little too much information to his mother-in-law. 

He and his wife, both 32, have been trying to fall pregnant for several years. After both undergoing fertility testing, it was found that his wife was likely to have complications. 

Explaining that he felt no resentment towards the possibility of not having their own biological children, he was 'excited' to explore other options, including adoption and surrogacy

But when his mother-in-law called to suggest his sperm may be the issue, the man jumped in to defend his swimmers, without realising his wife had told a different version of their issues - and inadvertently outed her lie. 

"I was on the phone with my wife's mom the other day, and she started saying some weird stuff," he posted to Reddit.

"She said it was okay that I couldn't have kids, but maybe we could find a sperm donor for my wife, and that she knew I'd be a good dad even if the kid wasn't related to me, etc.

"I was confused, so I told my MIL that my wife was the one who was having fertility issues. My MIL told me that my wife told her I was the one with fertility issues."

After recounting the conversation to his wife, he said she 'got really mad' and told him he'd had no right to put the issues on her. 

"She said it was something very personal to her and she felt awful just thinking about how her mom now knew it was her 'fault' we can't have kids easily (it's not her fault. She didn't choose to have these issues).


"She said that it was her mom and I should have just gone along with it because she always wants to be seen as good and capable in her mom's eyes."

Arguing he hadn't known what his wife had told her mum and questioning why she didn't just say they were 'having issues', he asked if he'd been in the wrong to disclose the truth.

Reddit users sympathised with his position, saying if he wasn't to know then he'd done nothing wrong, and asked why his wife felt it was ok to put the burden on him.

"I feel bad for your wife but she's clearly got some control or childhood issues related to her mom. Maybe try to reassure her," said one.

"It sounds like your wife is experiencing a lot of pain about the situation which breaks my heart, but it's inappropriate for her to get mad at you for not going along with her lie. Your wife should not be lying to her mom about her partner (or about anything she chooses to share) to stay in her good graces," added another.

"She 100 per cent threw you under the bus with this. Also, it's absolutely none of your MIL's business," argued one user.

"Word of advice from someone who struggles with fertility, don't tell people you're trying. They'll just keep talking about it and ripping open the wounds unintentionally. It hurts. I learned the hard way."