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jojopep

DD not eating

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jojopep

DD is almost 13 and has just started High School.  She is normally a good eater and would normally eat more than I would. She is slim build but not good with exercise and participating in sport. Her studies are going well and there does not seem to be any issues.  BUT she has decided that during the day she is not hungry with her lunch box coming home full.  The other day she went to school with no food at all(DH was at home and could not sway her to take her lunch).  She does not use the school canteen either.  When at home she eats well.  

Do you think that not eating during the day at school is just a phase? 

Have you experienced the same with you child?

Thanks

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seayork2002

I did not eat much during the day when I was a teenager  no reason I just ate when I was hungry or when I got home, not sure if it was normal or not but I was not the only one

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Hufflepuff

My 1st year high schooler does this too. Rarely eats breakfast or takes / eats lunch but will eat at home. I have a box of snacks & fruit which can be grabbed & thrown in bag. Sometimes taken, sometimes not. 

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Cherubs

It is a high school thing, all three of my kids refused to take food to school the first year of high school, two boys and a girl,  they all came around by year 8, and started eating at school.  I stopped making a fuss, made sure we had plenty of nutritious foods and meals at home.

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José

I dont think this is particularly healthy but it is quite common.  

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Mrs Claus
4 minutes ago, José said:

I dont think this is particularly healthy but it is quite common.  

My 17 year old has always been like this but eats well at home so 🤷‍♀️

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seayork2002

I just figure different cultures eat differently so there's not a one size fits all way of eating 

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Ruf~Feral~es

I was like this, and both my teenagers now do the same..... I wouldn't worry too much.  
 

If they have lockers,  my DD takes Carmen's Nut Bars and similar to keep in her locker in case she wants a snack.  WHilst expensive, I'm saving a lot on not buying too much lunch stuff, so I'm happy to provide them. A box lasts almost a full term.

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teaspoon
6 minutes ago, seayork2002 said:

I just figure different cultures eat differently so there's not a one size fits all way of eating 

Why are your responses often so obtuse?

The OP's daughter used to eat lunch; now in high school she no longer eats lunch.  No mention of cultural practices - just a mum concerned about her daughter possibly restricting food. 

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GingerbreadWoman

I saw the title, but not that it was in the teens section, and came in to see what good advice EB had because my DD eats almost nothing at kindy! I pack lunch and two ‘healthy snacks’ as requested and it all comes home. She is then ravenous as soon as she walks in the door and will eat the lot then. If I ask, she tells me she was ‘too busy playing’ to eat. 

I know when I was at highschool our lockers were in the buildings which were locked during breaks, so a lunchbox was annoying because you would need to carry it around the whole break. If you have snack type food available that doesn’t need a container, like  bananas, muesli bars, etc. will she take something like that? 

And if your DD is still eating well at home I would suggest making sure you have some good options available for after school snacks :) 

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Etta
33 minutes ago, seayork2002 said:

I just figure different cultures eat differently so there's not a one size fits all way of eating 

Yep - secondary school culture is quite different to primary school culture, if that is what you mean?!

My DC rarely eats at high school.

 

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Bearynice

I used to do this at high school. Lockers were ages away. I used to have a pocket sized snack in a zip lock bag. That would keep me going. It was all about portable snacks

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seayork2002
49 minutes ago, teaspoon said:

Why are your responses often so obtuse?

The OP's daughter used to eat lunch; now in high school she no longer eats lunch.  No mention of cultural practices - just a mum concerned about her daughter possibly restricting food. 

It was not aimed at the op it was to explain my thoughts on me not eating at that age as I mentioned in a pp

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Baily

If she’s eating at home I wouldn’t worry.  Loads of kids don’t eat lunch at high school.  
 

Maybe give her some money to keep in her bag for the canteen if she gets hungry one day, or get her to keep something long life and indestructible like a muesli bar at the Bottom of her bag. 

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Jenflea

@GingerbreadWoman they should be eating before they play.  DD's school and preschool both have eating time, then they are allowed to play. Primary gets 10 minutes eating time and 40 minutes play at lunch, can't recall preschool but I know they all ate in a group then. 

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jojopep

Thanks all.

@GingerbreadWoman, my DD's primary school all kids had to eat before play. In Kindy and Pre-primary they had to show Teacher or Assistant Teach they had eaten - showing empty lunch box with all their rubbish still in it.  Then they could put rubbish in the bin.

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jojopep

I feel some relief now.  She has snack time foods in her lunch box, I will just make sure she takes her lunch box every day.

 

Thanks again

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BECZ

Yeah, DD1 started high school last year and she didn’t eat while at school.  I gave up on making her lunches and just made sure that there were always snacks in her bag incase she got hungry.  Many of which got thrown out or given to the chooks after a while as they were crushed ect., but it gave me piece of mind that there was always something there if she got hungry.

She’s eating much more this year, so for my DD, it seems to have been a phase.

 

I wouldn’t worry too much if she’s eating something decent when she gets home (DD did that too).

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jmjsa

I have 2 year 7 children and a year 9.  Only one eats at school.  I used to worry but when I look at food intake over the day it is fine.  I just make sure they have some snacks in their bag If they are hungry.  These are usually packaged food that can sit in the bag or lunchbox for a few days

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amdirel

2 out of my 3 high schoolers don't eat at school. 

I've resorted to buying my DD packaged crap like mini chic chip cookie packets etc in the hope that she might eat SOMETHING as she often also forgets to eat breakfast, but I'm not having much luck in getting her to bring them!

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Rainbowbear

I never use to eat at school, I was too busy talking and just never felt that hungry. I also don't like sandwiches or food thats pre pared even now I rarely eat lunch unless its a proper sit down meal. 

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coolbreeze

I have two.

My dd doesnt eat breakfast but eats a healthy salad, fruit and a cake at school. She is 16 and always been like this.

My ds eats a healthy breakfast, egg on toast and milk, but usually doesn't eat at school. He will eat when he gets in at about 3.30pm. I send him to school with a few snacks inc ase he gets hungry, but mostly they come home uneaten. He is 12 and in Grade 6.

As long as she is eating ok at home i wouldn't worry. 

CB

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doubledelight

I noticed that my teenagers went through this phase when they started High School but now are a lot better.  I implemented two things:

 

1. Breakfast was non negotiable even if it was just a protein smoothie, I made sure I had a variety of different ingredients on hand

2. I gave them the responsibility of packing their lunchbox and once again had a variety of snacks and fresh food for them to select

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Kreme

I have one in year 7, one in year 8. My year 8 DD has always been reasonable with eating at school. She doesn’t eat a lot but always has something. I pack a variety of things and during Covid have taken up baking. My chocolate chip cookies always get eaten and it’s cheaper than packaged food. She will only eat fruit for breakfast. 
 

My year 7 DS is definitely going through the not eating at school stage but he has hypoglycaemia so it isn’t an option to let him do what he wants. The reason he’s not eating is because he’s playing handball or touch footy with friends so he really needs some food! I’ve had good success with leftovers in a thermos which almost always are eaten. I just try to make sure there is something in the lunchbox that he likes, regardless of nutrition. 
 

My experience with high school eating is different to PP. At my school the only girls who didn’t eat at school were the ones with eating disorders. I went to a country school so we had kids from farms who got up really early to work before school. And most of us played a lot of sport. Not eating for 7-8 hours would not have been contemplated!

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overlytired

My post is caveated with: Provided you know there are no eating disorders at play...

You say her lunchbox comes home untouched; what was the situation during the previous school year? She could legitimately not be hungry during school hours. We're born knowing to stop eating when we're full (eg a baby pulls off the breast / refuses the bottle when they've had enough). Forcing people to eat specific foods at specific times of the day is a social (societal?) phenomenon.

I'd be looking at overall intake. If, at the end of the day – or a span of 2-3 days – she's eating nutritious food and doesn't appear to be negatively impacted, I'd leave it be (while keeping a quiet eye on it). Making her eat when she's not hungry can cause other problems.

You can speak with your GP to make sure DD is healthy and there are no underlying conditions.

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