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mamaj180

How do you know when your done?…Did you get that feeling?

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Yearning

We sat down together & decided that we were 'done' after number 5. Both felt content with it, then number 6 was a huge surprise.

Number 7 was planned.

I am really hoping in the next year or so that I will feel 'done' again, as we're both getting older & I don't want to be having babies in my 40's when I started having babies at 18 ;)

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Woollenflower

This is definitely my last one.. I am 34 which by no means is old but I sm feeling it this time. After 5 pregnancies (4 live children and a stillborn ) I can't do it again.

Like mummaJo giving up my career is something I also do t want to do. My kids are awesome but I have worked very hard to achieve my career so 4 kids are enough. Dh is getting the snip

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tanyak1

After the second it took me 3 years to decide to have a third, I kept changing my mind.

 

After the third, as soon as I was pregnant, I knew I was completely done and never wanted to go through it again. My first thougt when he was born was relief I never had to be pregnant or give birth again. And now he's 6 and the thought of having another baby is my worst nightmare! So I definitely know I am done.

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nadi~bicardi

I have always wanted 4. DH wanted to stop at 2. I was positively depressed at the thought of never having any more after 2, so he agreed to have a 3rd.

 

DS2 is now 3.5 and I was just getting to the point where I had almost convinced myself that I was done, mostly due to my age. I had always said I wouldn't have any more after I turned 40, but then I compromised with myself and upped that to 42.

 

42 came and went and in those last few months I cried every month when I realised I wasn't pregnant. We weren't trying to get pregnant but we weren't using any contraception either.

 

I was finally coming to terms with the fact that there wouldn't ever be any more when SURPRISE, I am pregnant with number 4. He/she will arrive about three weeks after I turn 43. I'm not as excited about it as I thought I would be, mostly because I keep thinking I'm going to be 60 with a child still in high school, but I'm sure I'll get more excited as the pregnancy goes on.

 

I'll definitely be done after number 4, if for no other reason that my age.

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Minxybug

We have just welcomed our fourth and final baby girl 11 days ago. We are most definitely done.

 

This last pregnancy was my hardest and most difficult resulting in DD being born at 34+6 weeks. So 5 weeks early.

 

I was diagnosed with cervical incompetence resulting in a stitch to keep her in, SPD and sciatica.

 

I spent alot of time on bedrest and restricted activities. I also felt towards the end I couldn't grow her anymore. It also resulted in being airlifted to hospital as the ambulance could not get out to me. (we live in rural Wales UK)

 

As sad as I am that my baby making days are behind me I am also looking forward to moving the baby stuff on and watching our family grow.

 

I am also heading off to uni this year or next undertaking midwifery. I am so looking forward to working with women and their families on this miraculous chapter in life.

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Serenzy

We always wanted three, but after DD3 arrived I didn't feel done. We decided to give ourselves six months and if it didn't happen then a family of five we would be. We fell the first month, and welcomed our 4th girl in 2011. As soon as I held her, I felt complete.

 

Our third daughter is Autistic and has a chromosome microdeletion that is hereditary,and I had hyperemesis with all four pregnancies so I think even if we'd wanted any more our heads would have said no. It's not even an issue anymore as I had a hysterectomy for endometriosis and adenomyosis four months ago, but prior to that the thought of another baby made me cringe. That chapter is well and truly written for our family now, time to move onto the next. :)

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Raincloud

I had our 3rd child 4 weeks ago. I love pregnancy and already want to be pregnant again. I don't feel done. I don't know if I'll ever feel done.

 

Logically I know we shouldn't have anymore kids, mostly because we are a pair of losers and probably shouldn't have had any kids at all. But my heart yearns. Maybe it's just pregnancy I crave though.

 

If I wasn't too old, I'd look into being a surrogate.

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Cranky Kitten

I'm struggling a bit with this at the moment. My head says no, we're done at 3 (2 with DH and 1 from my ex) as logistically and financially another would stretch us well beyond our comfort zone. I've just gone back to work, the boys are starting to sleep better and are at a really awesome and engaging age. DS2's pregnancy was hard physically, and I had a few minor health complications that mean I'd rather not be pregnant again.

 

But....if I could somehow be 36+ weeks pregnant, give birth and have a newborn again without having to actually go through the whole pregnancy or have another child on a permanent basis, I'd jump at it. I'm not sure if it's to do with wanting to experience the expectation and excitement of meeting a new baby for the first time again or wanting to experience labour and birth again or even just wanting to cuddle a new baby again, but sometimes I do wonder about another.

 

Even though I'm pretty sure we're done, to the point of having started to sell off the baby stuff that the boys have grown out of.

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ttc#2@2015

I dont belong here but it came up in the side... I dont think you know if youre down until your current baby is no longer a baby. When DD was a baby I said no more and sold all my stuff, 12 months later she is 2.5y and easier and no speech therapy/physio so we want another :-)

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4keykne

I thought I was after number 2 then came an oops pregnancy which ended in a loss that made me yearn for more so much.

 

I am now up to 4 and still feel one missing. My DH says absolutely no more I am trying so hard to reach that point but it causes me anger and anxiety to try. For now I am just plodding along the little one is only 8 months maybe my mind will change in time.

 

If it doesn't then I am just going to have to find a way to deal with it. DH threatens to get the snip but still hasn't I am taking the pill though to make sure no accidents as it does need to be a joint decision to add to family.

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Quack Quack

I never had that "done" feeling until number 5. was about two years old.

He has Autism and a few other challenges and by two it was fairly clear he was going to be more hard work than the others all put together.

 

 

He is now 8 and the thought of being pregnant again makes me want to gouge my uterus out with a rusty spoon.

So yes, I am done like a dinner. Contentedly sitting and waiting for Grand children.

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MBK

I definitely experienced the "I'm done" feeling after #3. Before having kids (and even after my first) I wanted four, but when the third was born I just got the feeling that three was enough.

 

In a perfect world, I think everyone should just keep going until they have the feeling that they are done, however it's difficult to ignore other factors (relationships, finances, medical factors). I think I'm very lucky that it was completely my decision and I didn't have to weigh up the others factors.

Edited by MBK

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girlfrompdx

In my twenties I didn't want children at all. Having one at 31yo (though much wanted & loved) totally threw me and it took me about two years to even think about another. But eventually we did, and she was soooo easy compared to my son, but still... Boy & girl. Finished, lovely.

 

Buuuuut then I started edging my way towards 37-38yo and my biological clock started to quietly ding. Within a year it was like the bells of Notre Dame going off. Must have baby! Must have BABY! I had never had that crazy urgent feeling to reproduce before. In our heads DH and I said WTF there were so many practical reasons this was a bad idea. But our hearts had already decided on #3.

 

So after surviving a "geriatric" high risk pregnancy & then having the relief of holding beautiful DD2 safely in our arms, our hearts & heads were finally at peace. No more bells, no more ambivalence, no more cheeky notions; we're very content with what we've got and the gate is firmly closed for us.

Edited by girlfrompdx

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