Oh boy, what a start to this journey. After having the 8 weeks ultrasound and finding we were having triplets (2 identical babies and one fraternal) gob smacked we went home. The usual 15 minute car trip took over an hour. We kept getting lost.
I was in tears for days, confused and worried. What does that mean? Am I going to survive? Do they fit? Is it going to damage my organs? How do we move from here? And what about the financial aspects? Someone please shed some light.
Call parents, cry loads, book an obstetrician and start the next step, research.
It is funny how we try to control things. We planned this pregnancy as much as we could but there was universe showing us there is nothing you can control 100%.
The family can't believe this and everyone is scared. The Brazilian side have a thousand opinions. The English side made polite comments like "You’ve had a good run, enjoyed life, done loads of stuff." We just found it funny. We were still so shocked nothing made much difference.
You need to be very careful with your sources. Choose wisely your main trustworthy websites.
The obstetrician wasn't available for 2 weeks. Oh boy, how can I cope without knowing all things I need to understand? Decided there isn’t anything we can do until we talk to the specialist.
Finally, the appointment day arrived. The doctor didn't answer any of our questions. He said there was something more important at this stage. He showed us a powerpoint presentation, "Multiple pregnancy: Why you need to be worried".
Thirty minutes later and a lot of bad stuff he announced that we should do one more scan in a few weeks and decide if we were going to move forward knowing all the risks. He mentioned the option to terminate the identical twins given they share the same placenta and have higher chance of twin to twin transfusion syndrome.
We both couldn’t understand how we could make the decision to terminate. We decided to have a baby and universe gave us 3. How can we proactively decide to stop the heart of 2 foetuses?
It's time for more internet research. The web has a whole new meaning to me since this started. There is so much info but there is a lot of bad info too. You need to be very careful with your sources. Choose wisely your main trustworthy websites.
By now I joined every single forum, group, resource I can. I also joined the Australian Multiple Birth Association and signed up to receive a Newsletter called 'Higher Stakes' for multiple mums. And to top it all I have emailed a few triplet mums (that I found via those groups) telling them about the situation and the termination option that was offered. They all responded in less than a day, most had the same experience with their doctors. It is their job to let you aware of all the risks so you can make a conscious choice.
Some of the mums I met had even more complicated situations. Some were older, some had 3 foetuses sharing the same placenta, some didn't have a partner.
Heather, with 3 beautiful identical girls that shared the same placenta wrote to me telling about her history, was amazing to see the pictures of those healthy girls, now 6 years old. She sent me so much info, long emails, talking about everything. I felt overwhelmed with how beautiful people can be.
The 12 weeks scan showed some good news. There is a fine membrane that separates the identicals which means one less risk. They won't have risks of entangling on each other's umbilical cord and potentially suffocate each other. We feel more confident with so many successful cases around us. I also found a few bad ones, but it all just feels too much of a blessing right now.
How many of us struggle to get pregnant, and here I am, 3 at once. We are so lucky! Bring on the next chapter. I am confident we can do it.
Leave a message for Juliana in the feature member section on The Essential Baby Forums.