'Indescribable pain': Emilee Hembrow shares heartbreaking post after losing baby

Image/ Emilee Hembrow
Image/ Emilee Hembrow 

"Every loss is nothing but a reminder that nothing in this life is permanent."

That's the heartbreaking message Emilee Hembrow has shared with her followers after visiting the grave of her baby Jamal for the first time since his funeral.


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Hembrow experienced the devastating loss of her baby boy in June, 30 weeks into her pregnancy.

"We visited baby Jamal the other day," she wrote on Instagram. "So strange to think that my due date was just over a week ago. In life you can look at the positive or negative in situations, I thank god for helping me see the positive in my experience. If I didn't I don't know how else I would of got through the pain, it's truly indescribable."

The influencer and YouTuber, who is also mum to Aaliyah and Gabriel, has been open about her grief with her one million followers, sharing her story so others feel less alone.

"Any mummas or families out there going through what I went through, I'm thinking and praying for you. You're not alone, and I've been right there, when hearing the words 'I can't find a heart beat' and I know it feels like you're dead inside and you don't know how you will be able to be happy again but you will get there.

"Time heals and you will find comfort knowing you will meet your baby at the gates of heaven."


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In an update two weeks after his death, Hembrow shared a photo of herself cradling her little one. 


"Looking at this photo is really surreal to me," she reflected. "The pain comes & goes." Hembrow told her followers that when the doctor asked if she'd like to hold her baby after the delivery she initially said no.  "I couldn't comprehend the whole situation," she said.  "I was physically and emotionally numb. I didn't think I was strong enough to hold him, see him, touch him and then have to let go of my baby and give him back."

But a nurse who was with her changed her mind. "She told me that she had gone through the exact thing I was going through. She said if I didn't hold him and embrace my baby it would be the biggest regret I would have. All I can say is wow she was right. Holding baby Jamal, admiring his face, feeling his skin was the most precious moments that I will cherish for the rest of my life."


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In the weeks since the death of her third child, Hembrow has shared that the tragic loss has "changed the way I look at life".

"I've learnt many lessons and continue to grow each day that passes," she wrote. "Miscarriage & still birth is very common, just not often spoken about. I couldn't believe the thousands of messages I've received from families going through the same thing."

According to Stillbirth Awareness Charity Still Aware, there are six stillborn babies a day in Australia. In 40 per cent of cases the cause of death is unknown and 60 per cent of stillbirths occur after 28 weeks. Importantly, 55 per cent of women who experienced a stillbirth perceived a change in fetal movement prior to the diagnosis.

"Monitor your baby's movements and get to know who your baby is," the charity advises. "A reduction or a sudden increase in a baby's movements can sometimes be an important warning sign that a baby is unwell. Contact your health care provider immediately, and do not wait!"


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