'I'm banning my husband from our triplets' birth - because he's upset about their gender'

The father said he wishes he could have had a boy
The father said he wishes he could have had a boy Photo: Getty Images/iStockphoto

A woman pregnant with triplets has taken to taken to Reddit to ask if she's in the wrong for not wanting her husband in the delivery room with her, after he told her he wishes 'she could have given him a boy'.

The woman, who already shares a four-year-old daughter with her husband, she said they had trouble conceiving and were thrilled when they found out they were expecting triplets.  

"Right now, I'm 6 months along, so we thought we'd do a zoom meeting with our family to announce their gender (we also surprised them by telling them it's triplets!)" the woman wrote on the Reddit thread, under the sub-thread AITA (Am I the A—hole).

"Baby A was a girl, and my husband and I were both super excited" the woman wrote.

"Baby B was also a girl, and we were still beaming about it. Baby C is another girl, and we were both really excited about it" she continued, saying he was excited on the call, but immediately 'left to sulk' when it ended.

"I wasn't sure why, so I asked him what was wrong" she said, which is when he delivered this

He said, "I just wish you'd given me one boy, so I could do stuff with him." I told him "You can do stuff with your daughters, too".

He replied, "No, the girls will only want to play dress-up. I wish you gave me one boy instead of three girls."

"I was furious." The woman wrote. "He'd rather give up our three girls for one boy, even with him knowing how difficult it was for us to have any children at all. I yelled at him and told him he didn't deserve a boy if it meant he'd ignore his girls."


The soon-to-be mother of four said her husband texted his mother about their fight, who then texted her saying she was ashamed at how he was acting.

"Yesterday, I was on the phone with my mom, and she brought up how excited she was for the triplets to arrive, and she asked if I wanted her in the room when I was giving birth, or if I wanted her to stay in the waiting room. I told her she's the only person I want in the room with me."

"My husband was extremely hurt by this and asked why," she wrote on the thread.

"I told him that if he can't appreciate his daughters, he has no right to be there when they're born" the woman wrote. "He did not take that well. He started apologising, crying, telling me he was wrong, but they were his daughters too and he wanted to be there."

Mother holding newborn baby boy on her knees, closeup

This didn't change the mother's opinion, saying 'she's not changing her stance'.

"He will not be in the delivery room. He thinks I'm being unreasonable because I'm not letting him see his daughters being born. I think it's my choice who's in that room, and I don't want him in there after he said he'd trade our girls for a son."

Users replied to the thread, with majority saying the original poster was Not The A—hole (NTA).

"In 2020 a man still believes you can choose a gender while conceiving?" a user asked incredulously.

"NTA" another user said. "He blamed you for not giving him a son. What is this, the medieval time period?"

"Remind him it's HIM who didn't give YOU a son, since it's the sperm that decides what the sex is," they suggested.

"NTA but don't make your decision yet,"another user urged.

"Give it time, he may come around."

The post took a dramatic turn when another user found a thread that the woman's husband supposedly wrote and posted on the site, but was taken down quickly after it was revealed it was a fake post written by the woman's brother.

The couple already have a four-year-old daughter

The couple already have a four-year-old daughter Photo: Getty Images/iStockphoto

"My entire family is furious with my brother, including me" the woman wrote in the update.

"He told me he was trying to make the internet agree with me, but I've decided I'm cutting contact with him. I know it's an impulse choice, but I don't think he can apologise enough for what he said about my husband."

The pregnant woman has since updated the thread to say that her husband has since apologised and she now wants him in the delivery room.

"I know some of you said to hold my ground, but I don't think it'd be fair to my husband after he gave a sincere apology." she said in the updated post.

"Many people said I should let him into the room, which is what I'm going to do. As of now, it's going to be my husband, my mom, and my MIL. I trust these three people to be supportive of me and our babies."

"Thank you for all your comments, they influenced the choices I made, and I'm eternally grateful this all got resolved," she concluded the post.