Is your child ready?
Babies are hard work, I think we’d all agree with that. They don’t sleep much, you have to do everything for them and they need you 24/7. So when your child progresses past that demanding baby and toddler stage and starts their life as a school kid you’d be safe in thinking things were going to get a bit easier. Right?
Well I’m not too sure. Now that my first born is a big school kid I’m getting a taste of what it’s like being a school parent and I’ve got to say, I’m not feeling any more refreshed. In fact, I’m wondering whether the demands of a school kid aren’t even more than a baby.
It starts with the dreaded school run each morning, where at least a few days a week you will battle about something. Getting out of bed, eating breakfast, getting dressed, turning the TV off, brushing their teeth, hurrying up or GETTING IN THE CAR or all grounds for major meltdowns on both sides.
Then there is the dreaded lunch box. For the first two months I was the mother superior of lunch box packing, loving preparing it the night before, cutting up healthy snacks and coming up with creative sandwiches. Until the novelty wore off and it all came back uneaten, so now it’s a honey sandwich slapped together and some kind of snack in a packet I can throw in quickly.
True, after the mad rush to get to school before the bell rings, you do get 6 hours of child-free time to work, clean, look after your other children or Facebook. But sadly 3pm comes around faster than a kid running for the ice-cream van. I ask you, why did 3pm never get here that quickly when I was actually at school??
For those who work and manage a few more hours of adult time while their children are cared for in out of school hours of elsewhere, lucky you. You’re probably having your afternoon coffee about now. For the rest of us the long haul before bedtime now begins.
Of course the kids are always STARVING after school, so it’s more food preparation. And then the homework battle starts. There’s nothing more fun than trying to convince an exhausted kid to do their reader when they’d rather be plopped in front of the TV like a zombie, and that’s just the nights where there’s no after school activity. The easy nights.
The rest of the afternoons and evenings are taken up with soccer, netball, ballet, piano lessons, football training, swimming and tutoring, so that we give our little cherubs every opportunity to get really good at something so they can one day support us.....er….I mean find their inner talent and shine.
So then, as well as finding the time and inclination for both of you to do their homework, there is also the extra practice that comes with whatever extra activity they’re doing. Are you tired yet?
And that’s just the weekdays. On the weekends my job title moves to that of chauffer and booking agent, as I ferry my son from sport to dance class to play date, all in the name of his self-improvement and social standing. There’s no time for my own lying on the couch and reading a book or having a long lunch and a glass of wine self-improvement needs, that’s for sure. At least babies go wherever you do and sleep a few hours a day.
I recently decided this was all getting a bit too much when I realised my 5 year old was now attending piano lessons, drum lessons, hip hop dancing class and cricket. Sure, he loved them all and they offered many benefits, but it was just too much. Too much running around, too much extra homework, just too much on.
I had to stop and remember that he is only 5. Yes, this is the time when he will pick up skills the easiest and yes lots of people who are really good at something started very young. But kids need time to sloth around. They need unstructured time, just to be kids. And us parents need time just to be with them, without the constant pressure of being somewhere or doing something.
So I cancelled a few of those extra curricular activities, so we could just hang out on Saturdays. I know soon enough our weekends really will be overrun by sport, or dancing, or whatever my children choose to get involved with. And I’m sure I will throw myself into it and love cheering from the sidelines or the audience, as the focus of our lives moves from our achievements to theirs. But right now I want to get off the overscheduled train, while I still can.
As for my baby, she’s peacefully sleeping while I write this. It’s 2pm, all aboard…..
What do you think is more exhausting, parenting a baby or a school kid? And is your life feeling too over-scheduled? Go to Amity's Blog.
Amity Dry is a writer, composer, singer and mum of two. She blogs for Essential Baby and is the writer and composer of ‘Mother, Wife and the Complicated Life,’ a new musical that takes a raw and honest look at marriage and motherhood. Follow Amity on Twitter.
