hi eveyone just wondered what peoples opinions were on whether you would let your dh name the baby even though you didnt like the name and if so did you get used to it or do you still not like the name and what happens if you dont?
thanks

I wouldn't let DF name OUR child a name I didnt like, just as i wouldn't expect him to live with a name that he didnt like. When we talked baby names, we had to agree on something, its only fair that we both love our childrens names!

I don't DISLIKE Liam really but it's sort of down the list of my favourite names by probably twenty other names...but DH ADORES it.

So I compromised about it. If I hated it, that'd be different. I put my foot down about Siobhan, which he still is grumpy about, but it's absolutely no-fly for me.

He hated some of the names I put up, so fair is fair.

If you really dislike it then no way. If he loves it and you don't mind it and can't come up with anything you like then you may have to consider it.

My Ex named Haylie and I don't like it. It's never grown on me, if I could go back I would have discussed it more until we came up with something we both liked.

No, I wouldn't let dh chose a name that I didn't like, it would have to be a name that we both agreed on.

No way. We had many a heated discussion but eventually we agreed on a name we both liked. I would never commit to a name I didn't like

No way.
But then i don't really understand your question sorry?

I don't understand why ONE parent would name the baby??

No I would not I would keep on trying for a name you both like. I really liked Rohan but my husband did not he really liked Luke but I did not. In the end we settled on Liam.

DH liked a name I hated and could never imagine on our child.
I vetoed it, he came up with an alternative that I liked.

No. This is what we did:

3 months before baby was born we BOTH made seperate lists of the names we liked. Swapped the lists - then proceeded to cross out the names we did not like on each list. We performed this a couple of times until we narrowed it down to 6 names ... 3 first, 3 middle names. Then once bub was born DH was allowed to choose whatever he liked .... from the list.

It worked out well for us. But you both have to be happy with it. Comprimise it as a middle name perhaps?

Dh named dd1.

He loved it and i liked it but wasn't keen, only because it was to popular for what i wanted.

In the end we had a few names we both liked but none we both loved.
DD was born and with all the emotions (dd's heart rate dropped severely and needed oxygen at birth) and seeing how wonderful DH was during and after the birth, the midwife asked her name and dh said "we hadn't decided" and i said "jessica".

Although i liked it, it still did take me a while to love it. Jessica is 15 now and no other name would suit her and i'm secretly glad that i didn't get my way with the uncommon name.

What an odd question.

Why on earth would anyone agree to name their child something they don't like.

thank you for your replies.
huskie; it would be great if i could get him to do that,it would make it a lot easier and thats how one would assume you would come up with some middle ground! but not my dh no..
mischiefmaker;you wouldnt think it so strange if you were in my position and trying to come up with a name has actually become upsetting and not enjoyable.

thank you all again, at least i can see that it happens to other people and i'm not alone.

There is no way I would allow DH to name a child a name I didn't like. If I had let DH have his way he would have called DS, Philip. I don't necessarily hate the name, but there is no way I could have allowed him to use it as a first name, as a middle name it was wasn't so bad.

When discussing names when I was pregnant with DD, some of his suggestions were Samantha, Monique, and Belinda - I just couldn't imagine using those names.

our second child was named by his dad, we had two names, mine and his and I let him choose, assuming that he would choose mine lol. I had called him by "my" name in my head all pregnancy so it took a while, like a couple of years, to get used to it. I still dont love the name but my liitle one is 3 and a half now so a bit late to change . and Im a big believer in that names and people grow in to each other so in the end the name becomes the person and you love the person.

we have three boys and I didnt use "my" name for baby 3, because in my head it still belonged to baby 2.

I love how all the PPs have such unanimous descisions. wish my family was like that!

Hell no. Just as I didn't force the issue with the name I wanted. In really really wanted DS to be Regan. No other name close. But DP absolutely hated it. He did end up saying I could have it if I really wanted, but I knew how much he disliked it. I did use it as a middle name though.

My DH named both our children. He just happened to come up with a name each time that i fell in love with. I really think it should be a 50/50 choice though... it just so happened that i LOVED the names DH came up with. With DS i was sure i wanted Alistair or Julian, DH hated them both... Then off the top of his head came up with DS name. With DD We were both pretty sure we were going with Esme, id loved it since i was a little kid and DH loved it too. Then i was reading through a baby name book looking for a MN and said Gretel among many other names - i don't really like that name very much but it made DH suddenly say "what about Greta" which i just ADORE. SO anyway to sum up my waffle (sorry) - it should be a 50/50 choice. PS sorry for lack of paragraphs, my 'enter' key just died!

When I was pg for the first time I was soooo sure the baby would be a girl - I had a "feeling" (we didn't find out on the u/s) so given that I was so sure it was a girl I agreed to the boy's name DH had proposed, even though I didn't 100% love it, as I didn't think we'd need it He is now nearly 11 and I can't think of him as anything other than that name .....

With baby two we had our girls name from the first time still there and we decided we still like it so we had to come up with a boys name, which we did. But this pg was so different to the first I was sure this would be a girl. And it was.

With baby 3 we had a boy and girls name ready to go , by way of sitting down with a baby book and going through just about every name in the book until we came up with a combo we both liked Same thing with baby 4, whcih we did before the u/s (we found out with her) - should have saved ourselves some time and only had to go through 1 half of the book

Not on his own.
But we both agree on a name, neither of us just name them.

When I was pregnant with DS, we didn't know the sex. I gave DH a list of about 20 names of each sex I liked and we had so much trouble with a girls name. He didn't like any I had and he wanted...

Persephone....

i couldn't believe it. He had his heart set on it. Eventually we compromised with a different name that I didn't love, but could handle.

Luckily we had DS.

DH pushed for DD's name. I liked it but preferred others which he didn't like. I do love it now - has taken a long time but still sometimes wish I had pushed a little harder. DH now loves my previous choice and if DS2 was a girl we would have used it.

DS2 took forever to name (about 2 months officially) as we were torn between two names (which we kept alternating between them for 1st & 2nd name) because we loved them both and I didn't want to have regrets like I did for a long time after DD.

My advice is make sure you love the name as much as DH/DP because you'll be using and hearing everyday!

Good luck!

DH came up with DS2 name & I wasn't really keen on it, but then couldn't find anything else I liked either. Now I love the name & it suits him to a T. If I didn't like the name AT ALL then we wouldn't have used it.

no, we named/name all our children together.

DH knows I'm a name nerd so the only chance he's got is that I give him a choice of 2 and I might let him pick from those
I picked DDs name after months (OK, years) of consideration and he agreed to it. We are TTC soon and I asked him if he could cull my girls list as it's too long and he said he'd look if I wanted but he wasn't really all that bothered. He said "I don't think about names the way you do". His best mate got given naming rights by his wife and picked a Top 3 name.

Your DH will have to accept that he has to share the choice. You'll just have to keep trying until you can agree. Perhaps you can post both of your lists for us to have a look at? Do you have really different tastes? Is it your first baby?

Yes, our DS1.

I don't really like DS1's name but DH insisted on it. It is DH's Paternal Grandfather's name. So it is a family name. I got to name DS2. And I love his name.

I agree that both parents should be happy with the name they pick, however my husband is Italian and it is traditon to name the first born son after the grandfather. So It was difficult to go against a family traditon as I could see how important it was to him. So we compromised and we named our son after his grandfather but gave him the english version, it did grow on me and I cant imagine him being anything else now. I picked our daughters name and he agreed so I guess sometimes some compromise is necessary on both sides. Good luck and I believe in the end you will get used to a name as you watch your little one grow.
Deb

This. I have never understood why only one parent names the child that they share together. It should be something that you both agree on. I know a couple currently pregnant and if it is a girl, the mother will name it and if it is a boy the father will and the opposite parent has no say in the matter . Makes no sense to me what so ever.

i named our first as hubby wouldnt make a decision so when he was born and dr asked i said his name hubby hated it but grew to love it
second DS hubby was the same i threw names at him but he didnt agree or like any of them, when i was in labour he was reading the baby name book must have gotten as far as J as when he was born midwife asked and the J name it was i didnt like it at all but now im used to it and it suits him.
DD name we both loved for years so it was easy but the extended family hated it lol

No way. I'd keep trying to find something we both really liked.

We had the baby name discussion very early in the relationship so fortunately already knew we had similar taste.

I would never let DP name our child something I didn't like. Much the same as I wouldn't force a name on him that he didn't like (as much as I'd like to go ahead and use my top choices lol)

My husband is very keen on John if we have a boy. I don't dislike it but I would not have chosen it but it doesn't offend me so he can have it. I got the name I chose and absolutely loved for my little girl, which he liked too. I would never let my child be named something I actively disliked.

I don't know about him naming the baby without me having a say, but DH and I are finding names rather difficult at the moment and I am inclined to let him have his own way so one of us can have a name they adore rather than us both settling on a name we both think is "meh".

That being said, I wouldn't ever let him name the child a name I hated.

DH and I compromised- I had a girls name that I had adored since I was a child that DH hated and he had a boys name that he wouldnt budge from which I hated--we had boy/girl twins so we named one each-- FWIW I look at DS now and he is a replica of DH so I am really glad we used DH's choice

Absolutely not!

In our house whoever was present when the baby was created gets an equal say into what their name will be. Saves interference from other family members too! LOL

Absolutely not. Just like I wouldn't use a name he didn't like, no matter how much I loved it. Naming DS was a nightmare. We had very different tastes when it came to boys names, but we kept on ploughing through the name books until we found something we both didn't mind. Thomas was not my first choice, but it is a great name, it suits DS and he is very much a Thomas!

Nope. DH and I both had veto rights over a name if we didn't like it.
The only ones that made the list were ones that we both "liked" and then we narrowed it to ones that we both "loved".

Short answer - NO.

Long answer - BOTH parents have to be happy with the name. It doesn't matter whether it's Daddy OR Mummy wanting to name the baby X - if the other partner doesn't like X - then no, then it's back to the drawing (naming) board to find a name they BOTH like.

NO WAY!

We both decide our babies names. If one of us loves a name & the other truly despises it, then it's OUT.

We have to both at least 'like' it.

No.

My neighbour's family had this problem. The little boy was called W X Y, but the Dad never used the W name as he said he never liked it, and always called the boy Z. When the kid was 3 they officially changed his name to Z W Y. Seems like a whole lotta effort if you ask me!

Dh and I both loved dd1 name so that was easy.

This time around it's been a bit harder... His top choices I just can't see fitting the family, and he's just not that wrapt in my top choices. I think we are at the stage now where we are going to to go with the name that we both rewally like but is not on the top of either of our lists! It's growing on me more every day now though that I know it's a family decision!!

Good luck, it can be stressful process!!

again,thank you for the replies. at least we arent the only ones that are having/had this problem,that makes me feel a bit better. i wish dh had a list! thats part of the problem,he's only had one serious suggestion which i dont like,the rest have been side remarks about names he's seen in magazines-like dexter for a girl because he saw that diane keaton had an adopted daughter called dexter.he hasnt written a list whatsoever and when asked about looking at the name book he said he had but i've never seen him and its just been upsetting seeing as last time he sat and looked on the net with me,this time he just doesnt seem interested.now only have 3 weeks to go so i suppose there is a bit of time.maybe i'm just being a tired cranky pregnant woman...
thanks again

I read through a baby name book. Anything I remotely liked I put out there. DH would either veto or endorse. Occasionally, he'd come up with a name and I'd veto or endorse.

Maybe stop thinking about it for a while. Or set a deadline to have a three suggestions by and make a time to discuss them.

I did

I knew Chloe was a pretty name, it just wasn't one I liked. It's grown on me and it suits her perfectly.

madmatriach - It is easy for him to say no to everything without giving any suggestions. If he won't make a list, make your own list of say 10 or 20 names. Tell him to pick his favourite or go trawling through the book to make his own list.

I don't think it is fair for him to say he has just one choice. What if you did that? Then the baby would never have a name.

No way. It was tough for me to let DH have any input on naming . Fortunately he agreed to my suggestions for our daughter's first and middle name, and suggested the perfect name for our little boy. He chose the middle name, and it wasn't what I would've chosen to go with Rafael but I still liked the name. If he'd had his heart set on Wriley we would've come to blows.

we're having this 'discussion' at the mo.
I named our DS - the deal was if the baby was a boy I got naming rights, if it was a girl Dh got naming rights.
This time, DH is pretty much insisting on naming the baby (gender unknown). His boys names I can live with but his girls names are not good - Charlotte (sorry but i dont like it) Latisha (just eeeew) and he came up Savannah last night.
I just have to find some names and we can negotiate.

No way. We named our children together and it had to be something we both loved.

DH never came up with a lot of names ether. I just keep giving him list of names and talking about ones we liked, didn't like. And look don't stress about it, you will find a name eventually! None of our kids were named before they were born- dd2 & 3 didn't have names for several days. It didn't cause them any trauma but MIL wasn't impressed. LOL We just found it really hard to come up with a name we both really loved.

No way.
Our baby, we both have to agree. End of story.
Though I did let him give a middle name to DS1 that I don't like. But, as he has another middle name, the one hubby gave him tends to get left off forms

No way, I think naming a baby really needs to be a decision for both parents to make.

My mother named my brother Timothy, much to my stepfathers disgust, he hated the name as his ex wife had run off with a man named Timothy, so he said very strongly how much he didnt want that name, my mother didnt listen and went ahead and named him that anyway.

For the first 5yrs of my brothers life my stepfather refused to call him Timothy or Tim he called him Tommy.

My poor brother was a very confused kid for that first 5yrs. He eventually had to get over it and call him Tim but he is still not happy about it.

I think it was a very selfish thing for my mother to do to him.