http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/life-style...0407-1d56s.html

leave a message for Nut here.

Thanks for sharing and for reminding us to connect with family and friends as often as we can. I'm so sorry for your loss.
But Nut, this wasn't your fault.
RIP Lothar.



EFS.

So sorry for your loss & thank you for being brave enough to share your painful story. RIP Lothar

A heartfelt and raw account of something so painful and yet so often not spoken of.

Im so sorry Nut that you and your family had to experience this type of loss and Im so sorry for your brother who obviously felt so lost he couldnt see the way out.

xx

Thank you for sharing your story with us. It took a lot of courage.

You have reminded me to cherish every moment with people. Thinking of you and your family. Xxx

A member of my immediate family took their life a few years back and other than family, most people close to me don't know they commited suicide. Thank you for sharing your story, I know how hard it can be, RIP Lothar

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

I work in youth mental health & I just want you to know how important it is that you've courageously decided to share your story. We need to talk about suicide & the devastating impact it has. I hope someone reads this, recognises the signs you wrote about & does something to help a loved one who might be showing those signs too.

Thank you for your bravery.

Thank you for sharing your story Nut.

I'm sorry for the loss of your brother but I appreciate you sharing, it gives a little comfort to those who've been in the same situation.

I truly hope this helps people see warning signs and to help someone in need.

Nic you wrote your story so well. I am like i was when it happened so deeply sorry that you have to go through this.

Thank you for sharing your story. I am so sorry for the loss of your brother.

Nut - thank you so much for sharing your story. I can't imagine how difficult the last 10 months have been for you and your family.

Thank you also for reminding us why it's so important to love and enjoy our families.

Thankyou for sharing. I wish you didn't have such a story to tell.

I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious brother, thankyou for sharing your story I can't imagine how hard it was to write

And thankyou for reminding me not to take my family for granted, we too are a very close family and you would never think it could happen to one of our's, your story made me relise it can happen to anyone, anytime

Take care xx

that's powerful reading.

Oh Nut I am so sorry for the loss of such a kind hearted soul. Thank you so much for sharing your story, i know it would have been hard to write. I think that it is truly beautiful that you all have a tattoo that is a memory and will stay with you always.
It has made me think of my BIL who is currently depressed, i will make an effort to see him more.


Sending you lots of love to you and your family

Thanks for sharing, Nut.

I'm going to take a family photo with DH when he gets home, we don't have one yet and I guess I never considered there may be any urgency, but you really never do know.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Thank you for sharing your story - it has a real personal resonance for me. My family too are very close, like you said, others joke that we are 'abnormally' close. For the past few months my younger brother has seemed down and withdrawn; whenever I've asked him if everything has okay, he's brushed me off. I've always thought that, because we are so close, if something was really wrong, I would know about it. This has reminded me that that's not true.

What a touching story Nicole and so sorry for your loss .

My husband (also in IT) was bullied at work some years ago before our first child was born. I'm sure he went into depression and it was scary seeing your loved one replaced by a souless being. We agreed that resigning was the best thing to do. He found more dignity in being unemployed in the short term compared to his whole being ripped apart at work week after week.

I'm so sad for your brother having nobody to turn to and talk to during his darkest days. I hope your family finds some peace and love in remembering him.

Thank you Nut. Beautifully written.

Thank you for sharing a story that never should have to have been written. I have also lost a sibling to suicide (sister). No words can describe it.

I send strength to you and your family.

I am so sorry for the loss of your brother Nic. Please just know that nothing you could have done would have changed it. As someone who has been to those depths regularly, who has had a couple of failed attempts, has been hospitalised a few times for being suicidal there is not anything that anyone could have done any differently or said any differently that would have changed my mind or prevented the attempts that I did make.

I am in tears. I am just so sorry for the loss of your brother, but thank you for making us aware that we should make every day count (I am one who has no photos of me with the kids either because I hate them - You have inspired me to change that). Thinking of you x.

Beautifully written, Nut.

Thank you for sharing Nut. It's so true what you said about saying 'I love you' and taking photos. So often I say no to a photo because I don't feel my best.

I can see the family resemblance between your son (when you had him in your sig a while ago) and your brother.

I have never forgotten that photograph of your father mourning his son at the funeral. Very powerful and very moving.

All the best to you and your family, Nut.

wow Nut...your line "drowning in his own mind..." made me cry.

Strength be with you.

Nicole, thanks for writing it.

For the other readers.... I am Lothar's mother.
My son's decision to take his life devastated us.
To those who suffer from depression and keep it to themselves.... my message is, TALK TO SOMEONE.

Thank you so much Nic for sharing your story, and I'm very sorry for the loss of your brother. I can't find the right words, but you've done an important thing in sharing your very personal experience. Thank you, and *Ev, I'm so very sorry for the loss of your son.

Thank you for sharing your story. It is a good reminder for all of us about warning signs and watching out for our loved ones (although suicide prevention is not always possible). And it is nice for the world to know more about your kind brother - there was more to his life than his death.

Thanks so much for writing this story, Nut and to both you and Ev, I am so sorry for your loss.

I lost someone when I was young, and now I am very hesitant to get too close to people, just in case they leave me as well. It's great to read of how close your family is, even in the face of such a great loss.

Nicole,

What a powerful and important story to tell. Thank you for being honest and brave enough to share it here. I am so sorry for the loss of your brother. *Ev, I am so sorry for the loss of your son. No one should ever have to go through what your family is facing.

I'm so sorry for your loss *Ev, as a mother its one of my worst fears.

Thinking of you both.

What a heart wrenching story. Thank you Nut for reminding us not to take anyone we love for granted. My thoughts are with all Lothar's family and friends.

Nic and *Ev, I'm so sorry for your loss. The story is beautifully written and I hope it helps someone to make that phone call or visit so that a person suffering Depression might be able to ask for the help they need. No one can help until they let you know there's a problem

Nut and *Ev, so very, very sorry. How incredibly hard for your family.

Thank you so much everyone. I honestly didn't expect this kid of response. I truly appreciate it.

It's still a very hard time for us all and there is so much more I wanted to write. It's not an easy thing to put into words and have it make sense... It really is a topic that is not discussed enough and so easy to just assume that people you know are OK because they are surrounded by loved ones.

I will stop before I start a really long ramble though... But thank you all again.

For those interested, this is the photo peanut mentioned before. A photo that just sums it up perfectly. My father at the funeral before the other guests arrived.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v287/pautiric/Papa-BW2.jpg

You did an amazing job of writing a tribute to your brother. Suicide is such an incredible tragedy. It's important to write as someone left behind so people who are thinking of such a desperate act understand that they ARE loved, they ARE important, they ARE needed.

wonderfully written nic. *hugs* for you xxx

Dear Nut
Such a sad but important story to share.
Kel

Nut, *Ev and family. My thoughts are with you. I lost my best friend to suicide, he was successful, loved, wonderful family and friends. Everything to live for. Mental illness is a powerful and deadly condition, and so often what we see is just the tip of the iceberg. Thankyou for sharing.

I believe sharing the stories about suicide is critical.

Its critical for the families left behind, to cope, to be heard and understood.

Its critical for people who dont understand, to hear about it, and begin to understand.

Its also critical for people who suffer mental illness and at risk of suicide to have a greater awareness of the ramifications to those around them, should they succumb.

It might help them get through one more night. And that might be all it takes, before the tide turns for the better.

Bless your family and your brother/son/uncle/nephew. May he rest in peace.

Thank you for sharing your story Nut, very sad

May your brother RIP.

spotty.

Nut, Ev - I am so sorry for your loss, but rejoice at the love and close relationships you have within your family. Grief is raw and all emcompassing; I am so glad you have loving arms to turn to when you have the need.
I also remember the photo that you posted for the "fathers" topic, Nut. That pic of your dad made my heart stop mid beat, and I remember thinking If only those comtemplating suicide could see this, the raw emotion in a fathers face, see the grief, the damage, the unendurable pain.
May you have found your peace, Lothar.
For you all:

Much love to you Nut and Ev. I too remembered the photos you shared Nut and also had that heart stopping moment of grief for what you are going through.

I lost my partner to suicide almost 14 years ago now and my girls lost there Dad. There is no way to describe the turmoil that grips you but from some one a long way down the grief road take care and know he is now at peace.

Big hugs to you and your family.

Thank you so much for sharing, Nic. There was an article in the Weekend Australian Magazine a few weeks ago, about suicide and the restrictions on reporting it in the media. I think it is so important for people to know it happens, for it to be talked about and discussed. As you have so eloquently revealed, it has huge ramifications for those left behind, and I think it does family and friends a disservice to sweep it under the carpet.

Your story is also another reminder of the horrible consequences of workplace bullying.

thank you for sharing your story.. my condolences..

you and your family will be in our prayers..

My condolences for you and your family.

I know how hard it is to lose someone to suicide. It affects everyone.

Thanks for sharing Nut. I'm so sorry for the loss of your lovely Brother.

Nut & *Ev, I'm so sorry for your loss

Nut, thank you for sharing your story. I am sorry for your loss.

As someone who suffers from depression, and has been in that dark place numerous times, you have helped me see that I do matter and would be missed.

So well written.

I'm so sorry for your loss.