We've been ttc now for 16 months (just starting our 17th cycle). We are healthy, DH's sperm test, my hormone tests, ultra sounds and everything has come back normal. We've seen a FS now who has advised us that basically we are just one of the unlucky ones in that small percentage still struggling to become pregnant after 12 months. He wants us to keep trying for a few months before moving onto a laparoscopy. While it will be good to get things moving if we dont fall pregnant in that time, I just have this feeling that my tubes will be normal and we will still be none the wiser as to why im STILL not pregnant. Im just going to have to cross everything that we can fall naturally pretty soon because Im not sure what will happen if everything continues to be "normal".

I'd love to hear from anyone who's already had a pregnancy and struggled/struggling with a second or subsequent pregnancy.

What are / were the reasons of difficulty?

How long did it take you to conceive?

Anyone else out there have a similar story to mine?

So sorry you find yourself in this situation.
It took us about 20 cycles to get pregnant with DD2. It was a shock as DD1 was a surprise baby and so we had never actively tried before. We were diagnosed with unexplained secondary infertility and it was very trying on our relationship. We went through all the tests and did all the right things for getting a BFP.
Our FS told us that we needed assistance but DH and I decided not to go down that road and if DD was to be an only child, well, so bit. Our last stop was what DH calls 'the witch doctor.' I saw a TCM doctor who is well regarded who told me that my body temp was too low (exactly 36 and sometimes slightly lower). I did acupuncture and took herbs for two cycles and my temp rose. Next cycle was a success and I carried to term. I don't know if this was why (really, the human body is still a mystery!) but I continued the herbs and acupuncture and had a much easier time with less morning sickness, less swelling etc.

I wish you the best of luck.

Hello - yes another here who has struggled to ttc number 2. I have a history of irregular cycles so pinpointing ovulation was always a challenge but DD arrived with no hassles at all (4th cycle). This time i have been seeing a naturopath and we have settled my cycles into a fairly regular pattern but most of all I am in tune with my body re: ovulation signs etc. I have also been seeing a gyno for mid cycle spotting and since a D&C and hystersoscopy in Nov that has also improved immensely. I am hoping now that we are back on the road to ttc and it is a lovely surprise for us in the near future.

Goodluck with your journey

Hi there, I'm another one in a similar situation, although my fertility issues are't unexplained.

I have an almost 4 year old DS who was conceived with Clomid. We TTC for over 12 months, then it was discovered I had PCOS. It only took 2 cycles for me to fall pregnant so this time around we thought it would be similar.

My GP told me that there was a high chance that I wouldn't need any drugs, that my body now knows what to do, so we tried for 12 months with no success. We decided to try Clomid again and my Gyno was very confident that it would work again easily. Unfortunately it hasn't worked out that way, and after 6 cycles we have decided to call it quits. The side effects of the Clomid on my body are just yucky and we aren't prepared to continue down that path.

We would desperately love to have another baby but it looks as though this is it for us. We feel very lucky to have one gorgeous, healthy child which is more than what a lot of people have so we are at peace with our decision.

Best wishes to all of you on this difficult and stressful journey.

Sue

I am one of the unexplained cases and have been trying for 2 years, am 36. We have tried IUI 5 times and I've been seeing an acupuncture but only had a laparoscopy 2 months ago. Before my op my cycle was precisely 28 days every month but I could never tell when I was ovulating and every IUI I was producing 2 follicles. My op showed I had a small case of endometriosis. Since the op my body is starting to react more from IUI and produce more follicles. Unfortunately I produced 4 this time which meant we had to cancel for risk of multiple births. I suggest don't hold off the op any longer, you may get some real answers. Good luck in your journey!

Hi,
It took me 20 mths to conceive due to unexplained infertility. I ended up doing 6 iui's and 2 ivf before conceiving. I had acupuncture for the last 5 months and changed my diet exercise stopped drinking etc. It's very frustrating not knowing but hopefully it will happen soon.

We had trouble concieving #1, saw a FS, did testing & were about to start clomid when I fell pregnant naturally after 15 months. We then had secondary infertility, took about 6 rounds of clomid (including 3 double doses), still didnt happen. We then went down the IVF route, were about to start treatment & then fell pregnant naturally after 12 months. #3 pure accident, so blessed! I put it down to loosing a few kg, I got down to my ideal weight & BMI, not that I was overweight to begin with (56kg down to 52kg) & it happened.

I hope you get some answers quickly

op i could write your post word for word except we had a mc about 14 months ago so we have been trying for nearly 2 years in total.

We are trying for our second and my ob has given us 4 months before doing dye in the tubes (not sure if is the same thing you said)

I cant contribute anything constructive except to say i am feeling for you and gee it is hard and i have no idea how to suggest to make it easier for you. Before our next ob appointment i am going to try acupuncture and a natropath and see if either of these can help us. I have tried to eat healthier etc but i am not oevrweight and feel i am normally quiet healthy anyway.

good luck and i hope you get your bfp soon (and all of us too :-) )

is there a buddy group for people like us?????

Another one here!

I have highly irregular cycles and we conceived DS through injections & IUI after many failed rounds of trying naturally then clomid. Well actually not too many failed rounds as my cycles were so incredibly long...

We have been trying for about 9 months now for #2 and have done several rounds of injections and IUI with no success. Like a PP my dr also thought it would be quite easy the second time - not so much!

We are currently on a break (too many hormones and I massively needed a rest) and plan on doing IVF in June.

Unexplained infertility here too.

DS was conceived after three years of trying, and four cycles of IUI.

Second time around, we wondered if it would happen naturally. It didn't. This time, though, we didn't muck around and got straight into treatment when DS was a bit over two years old (after using no contraception in all that time). DD was conceived on the third round of IUI.

Secondary infertility is really quite common. If you are anxious about it, or if you'd like to avoid a big gap between kids, then have the laparoscopy. You never know what it might show up. Of course, like you said, it might not show up anything. In which case, you could start to look into what your options are.

I think you're doing the right thing by seeking medical advice on this. A lot of people just assume that if you can have one baby, then you can have another baby. Doesn't work like that, unfortunately!

Thanks for all the replies so far, its comforting to see that Im not the only one having difficulties...if only it could be easier the second time around.

amabanana, I can agree it is so trying on a relationship. DH and I argue alot more now and have even started arguing about further treatment if we end up needing it. Its great that you found the reason (well what you thought was the reason) and you had a great pregnancy. I dont really believe in unexplained fertility, there is a reason for everything so just hope I find my reason soon :-)

Susie78, I am very sorry to hear that you decided to call it quits after a trying time but I do understand that there are alot of people out there that dont even have what we do and we are very blessed

Taname, so good to hear your body is reacting better after the op. My cycle has also always been 28 days...I just have this feeling that Im going to need the LAP and after reading a bit about endo today I wonder if I do have a mild case as I do have painful periods and heavy but I really am clutching at straws, I'll never know for sure until I have the LAP. I wish the FS had of wanted to do it sooner but I think he just wanted to give it more time since my body is so regular and I've already had one baby. I am impatient too!

imamumto3, 3 times lucky for you not having to go through treatment in the end. That would have been a relief and nice surprise each time. DS took us 9 months to conceive and just before we fell we were talking about getting a referral to a FS, this time we've actually seen the FS so fingers crossed we wont actually need any treatment.

Chuckleberry, I tried acupuncture after only 6 months ttc for 2 cycles and I dont think it helped me but thats just my opinion, it works for heaps of people, also, I found it very expensive as I was going twice a week throughout the cycle @ $60 per visit. I know there is a group for people trying 12months + but I dont think there is one for secondary fertility which would be nice

Good luck to everyone else

Hi there,

I thought I'd share my story.

DH and I have been trying for #2 for 15 months and have been diagnosed with secondary infertility, and as yet it is unexplained. However I haven't had a lap yet.

We conceived my DD (almost 3) first month of trying.

So it has been difficult to accept that we need help second time around.

I've just had my first round clomid + IUI. Now in the dreaded 2ww.

My FS told us to do clomid-IUI for 3 months then move on to lap and depending on what that shows we can make a decision on how to move forward.

A lot of people don't seem to understand the pain and frustration of secondary infertility because we already have a beautiful child. But though I know how blessed we are to have our DD I fear she will never have a sibling. It's difficult to see so many of my friends adding to their family and to see my daughter's face when she meets yet another new baby, and asks me 'where's my baby sister?'

My heart breaks.

You would think she'd be too young to understand - but 3yr olds are so smart and very sensitive.

I'd love to join a group for people TTC no. 2 or 1...

unexplained infertility here too

DD was conceived after once cycle coming off the pill, she is now 8. We have been trying for baby no2 for 7 years. DH and I have had all the tests and they keep saying that there is no reason why we couldnt get pregnant.

I was so shocked, surprised and over the moon when i found out i was pregnant after 7 years trying, but sadly i miscarried a month ago. The good thing is though the gynecologist the hospital sent me too after i miscarried is doing tests, hes checking for blood clotting disorder. I see him again this friday to get the results. Im hoping this guy will be able to find a reason why we arnt getting pregannt.

My cycles are always spot on i can just about pinpoint when im getting AF but the weird thing is there is a common trend with the girls of my family who find it hard to conceive. My nanna had 4 children and only ever conceived in a leap year. Mum has a 7 year gap between my older siblings and me and my brother, My eldest sister has 8 years between her two and my second sister had twins first up then conceived 10 years later with her third.

Im just beginning to think that there is some genetic disposition to big gaps in fertility

Oh my goodness, Gemini Mum

My story is almost identical.
I've been ttc for 16 mths - now onto 17 cycle with my second child.
DD almost 3 - fell pregnant first month ttc (seems like a small miracle to me now!)
FS says everything looks fine - done all the tests, bar the lap - and he thinks we're just one of the 'unlucky' ones still ttc after a year!
I'm now onto my second Clomid + IUI cycle and hoping for the best. I just couldn't keep going on our own after 14 months it just got far too stressful and I really needed some hope!

Please let me know how you're going and I'll keep you posted!

Take care,

HaleyW

Its heart breaking what we have all been through.
For me the hardest part is not knowing why, it puts stress on relationships and friendships.
And I hated hearing - 'just relax, it'll be your turn soon'

I am now finally pregnant with my long awaited 2nd baby.

My son who is now 10 was a surprise, when he was 3 DH and I decided to try again. 10 long months later i was finally pregnant only to miscarry a week later. It then took another 14 months to concieve again and again a week after finding out I lost this baby also, due to an etopic pregnancy and lost one of my tubes.
After another couple of years of trying DH had sperm tested, I had hormone levels tested, no one could tell us why we could concieve. I had the lap and dye and then did 4 cycles of IUI, after that our only option was IFV we simply couldn't afford.

After 7 long heart breaking years we decided to give up, we decided to make the most of each other and our little family of 3.
A month later i was pregnant...

Sending you all hugs

Amanda - what an inspiring story. Thank you for giving me hope.

Amanda that's just lovely that you are pregnant after so long trying. Thanks for sharing that here. Wishing you a very smooth and safe pregnancy.

Just had to say congratulations Amanda! After so many years, tests, and unexplained infertility, you must be feeling wonderful... and pregnant

Good luck!

What a lovely story and a big congratulations!! It just goes to show never to give up hope!! I hope all goes well for you!

We tried for 8 months (I know it's not that long) and then gave up from the stress and went back on the pill. I had some dental work done and had a large abscess above a tooth. I got pregnant shortly after it's removal and the antibiotics interfered with my pill. There have been a few studies done about dental hygiene and fertility, gum disease also has a great effect on sperm.