Im feeling a bit down today & was hoping for a little encouragement. I have basically been sobbing all morning & wasnt sure where to post this cause its not exactly a vent!

Last night we went to a 40th B'day BBQ & I met a nurse who has worked in our local hospital in the neo natal intensive care 21 years!! She was telling me about her saddening day at work & basically it goes like this. She said there was a triplet delivery at 26 wks & the 3 bubs were practically born to a life sentence of disabilities due to the probs they will encounter from their premature delivery. She then went on to say they have had about 3 sets of triplets & one set of quads in the last 4 weeks & realistically only 1/2 of the triplets will live normal lives due to their premature births at 26-32 wks. She went on to say that the quads were fine because the mum was admitted to hosp 8 wks early as a precautionary measure, but apparently they dont do that with triplets because they dont feel a need to be precautionary as they do with quads!!!!!!!

This lady had NO IDEA THAT I WAS PREG WITH TRIPLETS & I DIDNT LET ON. I kept probing the conversation for some glimmer of hope, but basically I just got sadder & sadder hearing about this...... It has left me terrified I what might happen & of how uncertain the future is.

Sorry to put a downer on everyones long weekend. I guess I need to keep my chin up & think positively & keep telling myself that things will be okay!!!

I was wondering if any one can shed some light on things I might be able to do to improve my chances of a healthy preg?

Will me stopping work at 12 ish weeks to take it easy at home make any differece?

Is this correct that approx 1/2 of triplets end up with long term complications?

Also, Is it too soon to join the multiple births association??

I was wondering if anyone knows of many triplet mums that they have met thru their local multiple births assoc & if they can pass on any advice they may have heard on things I can do to improve my chances??

If you've read this far, thankyou - your very patient! Any advice/encouragement is appreciated & welcome.

Cheers, Lilymurray

ME 28
DH 28
TTC #1 12/03
Gonal F -BFN 2/12/04
Gonal F -BFP Triplets due 11/10/05
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Hay there and WELCOME to this side of the boards
Glad to see you found your way over here. Anyhoo i have no advice on what you where told about triplets, i think Nee would be the best person to talk to about this. Im sure she will be a fantastic help and give you a bit of reasurance.
Stay positive hun and think of those three wonderful little bundles of joy.. Thinking of you & hope you are feeling better soon. xox

Hi Lily
Welcome to the site & I am sorry to hear you had such a negative experience. Wow - triplets, how lucky you are to have been chosen for such a gift!
I don't have much advice about triplets in particular, but can tell you what I think helped me have a longer twin pregnancy.
I definitely think that stopping work so early will improve your chances of a long pregnancy. I stopped work at 27 weeks and I am convinced that this was why I lasted until 37 weeks with our twins.
Read as much as you can about triplet pregnancies (no I don't think it's too early to join Multiple Births - I went to my local Under 1s group when I was preg to get pram ideas!!).
I also went on a high protein diet when I found out that our twins weren't putting on much weight and it seemed to make a huge difference to their weight gain (most multiple preg books outline a typical diet).
I hope you are feeling better and everything goes well for the rest of your pregnancy.



Lisa
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Hi Lilymurray, you poor thing to have to listen to all of that. Try to put it out of your mind and focus on the positives rather than worrying about 'what ifs'. Try to rest and look after yourself as much as possible and listen to your doctor. I think it's natural to worry when you're having a multiple pregnancy but you have to try and relax and look forward to the furutre with your three blessings.
All the best,

Maycee (35)
DH (33)
Twin boys (4/12/01)
DD (7/10/03)

[color=Teal]Hi Lilymurray

I was originally pregnant with triplets (I lost one at around the 12th week of my pregnancy, and went on to give birth to 2 healthy boys just short of 37 weeks). Being pregnant with triplets is definitely high risk, but I certainly wasn't told any horror stories by my ob, or anyone else for that matter. I was told that with careful monitoring, and taking things easy, there was every chance that everything would be fine.

I'm sorry you had to hear such awful stories.

Take care, and definitely speak with your ob about what would be the best time to stop working, and any other things that you can do to keep those gorgeous babies in there for as long as possible!

Take care, Vanessa

Hopefully you'll get to hear more good stories than bad.. rest up as much as you can. cant imagine you have a great deal of energy? i finished work around the 27 week mark as well and prior to that cut down hours as much as possible.I lasted till around 38 weeks with my twins.

Anyhow... best of luck.... Rebecca

Me 31
DP 28

Fraternal twin girls
Amber Rose & Olivia Teresa 08/05/03

HI All

Thanks for the advice & encouragement. It was well needed!

Dr is planning on having me stop work around the 12ish week mark (after my 12 wk U/S nextweek) just to be sure.

Lisa: I already have a book on triplets & if I could read/write down the amount of food it says for me to eat, i'd be here all day reading/typing. LOL. I just hope I can keep up with it as M/S is really holding me back ATM!. Hope fully that will calm down soon

Renee: Dr didnt give me stats, he just went on & on about the risks, but no stats.

Thanks for the shoulder everyone, hopefully next time I post here, it will be cute little U/S pics of the triplets or something similar


Cheers, Lilymurray

ME 28
DH 28
TTC #1 12/03
Gonal F -BFN 2/12/04
Gonal F -BFP Triplets due 11/10/05
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Posting this for a non-EB friend who I asked to look at this thread:

Lily,

I just wanted to add how sorry I was to hear about your terrible experience with that nurse, what an awful thing to have to listen to when you are pregnant with triplets!

I would also highly recommend getting in touch with your Multiple Birth Association as soon as possible, I don't know which state you are in but if they are anything like SAMBA they will be wonderful and maybe have a HOM group.
Our MBA also have a monthly newsletter that has a For Sale section which often includes triplet prams if you are thinking of going secondhand.

All the best, and can't wait to see your U/S piccie!


Jo

I am the proud mum of 3 very healthy 1.5 year old triplets- all boys. They were born at 30.5 weeks and I do feel for you. I too was scared to death throughout my pregnancy and the horror stories told certainly did not help. Remember doctors need to warn you of all the dangers so you can not sue them in the event of problems arising that they did not warn you about. (I was even told that selective reduction was a good idea !!!!!) Please join the MBA but also join and talk to the many mums who belong to the Higher order multiple birth association (for triplets and quads) You will talk and meet many parents who have successfully given birth to 3 or more and have healthy normal babies. So it is not all doom and gloom and the sooner you can discuss with someone the ups and downs of multiples, the better prepared you will be for the future.
I stayed and worked from home from about the 9th week as I had severe morning sickness but I was also scared to do too much ( I experienced bleeding in week 8). I found plenty of rest, plenty of healthy food and the thought that I was doing the best I can to give this pregnancy the best chance was helpful. I carried a single baby plus identical twins which also increased the risk (due to twin to twin transfusion).
I think it is fair to say the nurse has seen and experienced a fairly large number of premature or problem births and not all of them are multiples and unfortunately she only sees the sick ones - remember a lot of multiples are born without intervention. Sadly, however the risk of problems do increase with multiples and there are plenty of websites to provide the details and statistics for you (just use a search engine and they will find them for you) I read lots and lots and found understanding the dangers helped me to prepare for what was ahead.
There are a lot of women in Australia and the rest of the world who have gone through what you are experiencing and have given birth to 3 or more healthy babies - so you can too.

Hi lilymurray,

Sorry to hear about the bad start to your weekend. Remember though that the nurse you met works in neo-natal intensive care which means she only sees the babies who are unwell to begin with. Perhaps if you get a chance to speak to a nurse who works with neo-nates outside of intensive care you will hear some postive stories.

I am nearly 35 and I was very good friends with female triplets the same age as me when I was little. They lived just down the road and they were perfectly healthy girls who were born at a time when medicine was nowhere near as advanced as it is now. I have run into them occasionally over the years and know that they now have families of their own. If triplets born 35 years ago can lead healthy and problem free lives, then your triplets have an even better chance!

I know it must be difficult but try not to stress. Just do the best you can to give your triplets the best possible start and look after yourself as well.

Wishing you a safe and happy pregnancy,
Jenni

Me 34
DP 31
DD 06/03/04
m/c 03/05

Hi

I'm so sorry to hear that you had such a negative experience. Even though i only had twins i will tell you what i did to carry them so far. Basically like others have said i finished work really early (at 27 weeks), and just relaxed pretty much for 3 months. We moved in that time so i was kept busy but i slept in most days and if i didn't feel like getting out of bed i didn't!! I carried my little guys to 39 weeks and had to be induced!! All i can say is be really positive, eat well and look after yourself and let nature take its course. Don't let what that lady said worry you as it is the last thing you need when you have 3 beautiful babies growing inside!! I was very worried as i had people saying stuff like i wouldn't get past 28 weeks etc but i did and you can too!!

Good luck and keep your chin up.

Rach

Rach (26), BJ (35)

My boys - Aidan & Keenan
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Hi - I have not had a multiple birth but one thing I found when I was pregnant with my kids is that people love to tell you the bad stories, the horrible labours, the painful sick pregnancies etc and few tell you the positive stories.

I have found the community here on EB to be one of the places you get some honest answers as a lot of people like the anominity.

Good luck had I hope you have a uneventful pregnancy and labour.

Sammy

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Just wanted to let you know that there are also positive triplet pregnancies! I was a nanny in the Uk in 2001 to a lday who was pregnant with triplets. She had them at 37 weeks and 5 days! She had a 2 yr old who I looked after the majority of the time and we set a fride up in her bedroom so when she needed to she stayed in bed but could snack as often as needed. I know it owuld have been disheartening to hear the outcomes of those other pregnances, but babies whether or not they have a lifetime ahead of special needs are such a special part of life and you're having 3 at the one time, how extra extra special! I'd love to have triplets one day, i know it's a lot of hard work, but seeing them together after they were born was just mind blowing. Just tak each day as it comes and think of the positive triplet pregnancies ýo've heard about and look after yourself!

I'm not a triplet Mum but I also know of a lady who had triplets about 40 years ago (not sure what gest). She had two boys and a girl and back then they even did x-rays to see how many she had in there. She was put in the RBH on bed rest for many weeks and the x-rays displayed outside the room were the cause of much interest. All her babies were fine and I recently heard her daughter is now a grandma.
I also know of another triplet Mum who would probably be about 31 weeks now and she was hospitalised from about 27 weeks on complete bedrest barring toilet and the doctor will be happy for her to get to at least 34 weeks (that is his goal). I think she may have had some slight ctx and she was put in instantly didn't even get to go home but so far so good. I'm sure if you have good health care they will do as much as they can to keep the babies well. I'm not totally out of the loop with prem bubs either as I lost a brother at 20 weeks and then gained a sister at 27 weeks (2 lb) who by the way had no complications from her prem birth. I understand multiples have it harder but take it easy and do as your doctor says, will be praying for your coming family.

Susan ~ Jacob, Patrick, Caleb, Thomas, Ethan and baby 29th October!

Thought you might like another positive triplet story. The lady across the road from us is in Sydney this weekend going to the 40th birthday of her identical triplet nephews!

Steph
DD Alex (March 04)

Hi! Lily, what a horrible experience you had to endure. I am expecting triplets 15/9/05 - 17 weeks gest. No other children. I am lucky that so far I have had only positive experiences apart from total strangers finding out and saying things like "you poor thing". That drives me crazy! What right do they have to say such things? I'm glad it's me and not them too! I'm sure that the NICU nurse would be horrified if she knew she was speaking to someone expecting triplets! It's true that she has only seen the highly-dependent triplets as she's been in NICU.
As for me, I am determined to remain positive about my pregnancy but have found that by reading not-so-good stories I do get a little worried sometimes. I joined the Multiple Births Association as soon as I found out about the 3 and have been in contact with other expectant HOM mums, and we also visited a set of new triplets in hospital which was fantastic. I'm finishing work at the end of next week and am looking forward to my long period of incubation! I'm celebrating my great luck at being chosen to carry 3 babies at once, and am going to do everything I have to do to make sure I keep them inside for as long as I can. Rest, keep up the good work and be happy!

Bianca

Just updating the triplets I mentioned have been born and I hear they are all breathing on their own and seem healthy.

Susan ~ Jacob, Patrick, Caleb, Thomas, Ethan and baby 29th October!

Hi my name is Stacey and today is my first time using this site. I am constantly surprised how negetive people can be. Try not to worry about the what if's. I doesn't help anything. You sound like a well balanced person who will deal with things in logical and educated way. Surround yourself with positive people and enjoy the fabulos gift you've been given. Keep healthy and rest when you can, and what will be will be. I have 4 under 8 and am expecting twins in july. Each pregnancy has bought new challenges and worries. I just try hard to only listen to the good coments and totally ignore any others. Speak to a couple who cannot have children and you'll relise it's worth all the stress and hard work. good luck

Stacey