i am due to have my DS#2. I want to include my surname into his surname, but i am worried about what people, especially inlaws will think about this.

Do i have a right to include my surname in his?

Katherine(25) DH (28)
Dylan 24/10/02
Kayleb (due 15/2/05)

I would say go for it. You certainly do have a right. One way that so many people are doing it is by using a hyphon e.g surnames being Smith and Brown the name could be Kayleb Smith-Brown, or Kayleb Brown-Smith. It does not really matter which name goes first. Most go by what sounds best.

I hope that helps. By the way congratulations on your pregnancy and i hope all goes well for you.

Kind regards
Angela
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Yes, go for it - there's nothing to stop you.

I'm putting my surname as my child's second middle name as I personally don't like double-barreling, but I wanted our children to have both my name and my DH's name (I didn't take his name when we married). DH thinks it's a great idea too.

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I am assuming you have not taken on your DH's surname? If so I think its fine, it will actually make life a little simpler for you as your sirname will be part of theres and they wont seem like some kids you picked up off the street! However if you have taken on your DH's name, I think it would confuse the situation a little. I know its hard, I realy wanted to include my maiden name because I loved it and dont particularly like my married name, but my DH said I had to have it. So my kids have it.

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yes your the parent what you say goes!! my daughter has both mine first then her fathers..

DD 29/5/92
DD 17/8/04

dd has my surname as her 2nd middle name as well

DD teliah

Just wondering, has anyone included their surname without using a hyphon?
I have said that our baby can have my boyfriend's surname so far throughout my pregnancy, but now as it gets further along I am wishing that my name could be included too.
I dont want to take his surname for myself, even if we do end up getting married.
Someone told me that they used their surname as a middle name for their child, but I've never heard of that happening... ?

A childs middle name can be whatever you want it to be wether it's a surname or not. Your child your choice.
FWIW- I have a first name two middle names and a last name. One of my middle names is my Dad's last name. It is not hypened so not a last name but a middle name.

How funny, a 3 1/2 year old thread! I couldn't figure out why someone was debating the name for their 3 year old son .

*megz* - I think a lot of people include the mother's surname (or maiden name) as their child's middle name, it's a great idea. I didn't change my surname when I got married, however we're not going to include my surname in the baby's name, it's quite an awkward one that wouldn't work too well as a middle name.

Both my brother have mum's surname their fathers surname without the hyphon.
It's your child you can name them as you wish. It's not the MIL's choice.

I don't know if our experience will help you or not, but we didn't do any of the suggestions on offer. Instead, we got the letters from both of our surnames, mixed them up and made a new surname for our daughter. It's a standard surname, so it's not unusual or weird to hear. Schools get you to fill in details for both parents, so I'm known by my name, DH by his and Harry by hers.

It causes us no concerns or stress from others, in fact we've received quite a few comments on what a great idea it is. The ILs are very traditional types and so far we haven't received one thing with her surname written down, but we always knew they wouldn't like the idea.

But when it comes down to it, our child has her own name with her own legacy to create and pass on if she wants to. I love it and #2 is going to have her surname as well, so she's going to have someone else in the family with her name too.

Cheers, Cass
oh and ps - people used to ask us whether you're 'allowed' to do it. Of course you are! You're allowed to make a child's name (surname, MN or whatever) to be exactly what you want it to be.

I know heaps of people who have done it, and i wish I had done it too, so go for it.

My SIL has done it for her 3 girls I think it is lovely.. I would have done it but my maiden name is not one that could be used with out teasing..

I didn't change my name when I got married as was adamant that my children should have my surname and my husband's too. So my children are B myname-hisname. When they get older they can choose what surname they want to have
I like your idea, Spawn! I wish I had thought of that.


do you have something you wish to share with the class? LOL

LOL! The subtle knife, hey Lyra?

Yes, but no date yet, going for the scan on Friday. Very early days atm and the hysterical panic has started to subside (we were never ever NEVER going to have another).

I did it with DS by doing the same as PPs and using my surname as his second middle name. DH hated the idea and still does 4 years later, he thinks I took something away from him as a man by adding my name

My parents like the idea but most people don't mention it, probably because they don't remember.

I did it so that DS has a link to my family in future years and I think that I also did it as I was still getting used to the idea of 'losing' my name and family identity. I'm glad I did it but it doesn't mean as much to me now and I rarely ever think about it.

I have recently had a DD and I didn't give her the name. Now I'm starting to wonder if I should to avoid having issues with her in later years thinking I favoured her brother etc. Also DS thinks she has it in her name as he does so he calls her Ava Elleanor xxxx xxxxx. What do others think- should I add it or leave it as it is?

including maiden names as a second given name was how Middle names started.

One day I hope to give my maiden name as a second middle name for 1 child. To be honest my first name is more of who I am than my last name. My last name is just a means of identifying which family I beleong to at the present time. Whats the name that I am called by 100 times a day? I'd prefer to pass that on.

I cant stand hyphenated surnames . They just look and sound horrible. I'd much prefer both husband and wife take the letters of both their names and create a new more practical one for their family. (Just think, We could have been the Pickup family ) Hyphenating, they don't have either parents last names, it still creates a different last name. Rose and Rosemary aren't the same name are they? just similar and one derived from the other

Yes your child has the right have your surname too

We had a lot of difficulty in deciding this issue before my son was born three months ago. In the end we went for both surnames without the hyphen. Our surnames are both one syllable so it seemed to work, and he can drop one of the names when he gets older if he wishes.

Now my partner is campaigning for us all to change our name to a rough amalgam of our surnames, similar to what Spawn chose to do. BUT (And it's a big but), the name he wants is - wait for it - PICKLES. Fair enough if fate has landed you with such a moniker but I'm not sure if I want to take it up by choice. He's taken to surveying our friends in an attempt to build up a faction. Oh well, so far I'm winning!

I say go for it. The only problem I see is that it might be weird having siblings with slightly different surnames (unless I missed something and you're thinking of changing the first child's name also).

congrats! I understand the panic. number one was IVF and I had such a terrible time with that I vowed never to go through it again and resigned myself to only having one child. So, yeah, imagine my surprise when B was 14 months old and I peed on a HPT and it was positive
Good luck with it all!


PMSL


okay, back to the discussion now

I could be wrong and it may vary from state to state, but I'm sure I read somewhere that children who have the same parents have to have the same last name.

Definitely not in WA, which is where DD was born. I doubt such draconian ideologies would be in place as legislation. If anywhere was going to be patriachal I'm sure it would be WA too. I can't see anything about it on the NSW site.

That would seem ridiculous to me, what if you weren't sure who the father was for one of your children? And I'm sure I've heard of instances where a child and his mother are estranged from the biological father, the child is adopted by a stepfather and changes their last name to the stepfather's name.

Spawn - congrats! I love your last name idea. Unfortunately I doubt my DH could be convinced of such a thing, and if we did combine our names it would be something like Scabson or Dobbler... neither of which appeals!

If you weren't sure who the father for 1 child is then they wouldn't have the same 2 parents listed on the birth certificate would they?

And if a step father adopts a child, then legally he is their parent and an older sibling would legally not have the same 2 parents then.

I'm in WA and I know a lady who has 4 children.
DD1 and 2 have the same Father but she decided to give DD1 the Fathers last name and DD2 her surname.