Morning! I think DH is going to take a sickie today, his big project is on hold until the board approves the money for it so he doesn't have much to do at work and thought he'd rather stay home and do some renovations today.


Cassi - I like your new word, a cross between hormonal and emotional I presume? Very fitting anyway, I'm going to start using it! How adorable of N to wipe your tears, what a sweet boy you have. No idea about fevers before AF sorry.

Melanie - your DH sounds like mine when it comes to the essay, annoying when their expectations are so high!

Ellangel - were you TTC during series 1 or just frisky?

Elliesmum - yep might take a day longer to get to Michelle, I know it often takes an extra day for mail to get to my parents who are in rural Vic.

Ali - hope DD has a nice big poo for you this morning!

I'm @ home today, still running a mild fever even though I feel ok, just a bit flat and tired really.. I was over heating in bed last night, I was having really vivid dreams that I was Pg and was doing the whole Drs appts and scans and things, was a bit weird. I told DH and he had dreamt the same.. No idea whats going on, probably just a virus of some sort, if still feverish tomorrow I will head to the Dr and find out what is going on.

Blondie - feel free to use it, I borrowed its use from a friend. You are right, those darned hormones that make you all emotional like right before AF.

Sharon - when are you coming down to Sydney? I am heading that way at the beginning of May.

Sarina - how long is your DH away for? Mine is going away for 2 months at the beginning of May until June 30.

PJ's - It has turned cold quite quickly in canberra so Angus is sleeping in a long sleeve body suit and long pants and then a o.5 gro bag and a doona over the top. When it gets really coild we will put flannies and socks over the top of that.

Cassi - I have had hot flushes for the last couple of days but no temperatures. I am also due for AF.

Question - how did those girls that wanted another baby in the heart but in the head it was crazy make the decision not to go ahead?

We are struggling with this at the moment. In my heart I really want another one and in my head it is totally crazy. Plus it is really financially just crazy. We could probably get ahead if we had another one but it is starting to get so easy now that Angus is older.

cassi - are you preg? strange you and DH dreaming the same thing...

anyhow not itme to post now, be back later

Hi all

I know I have been MIA for a while but life was just crazy before we went to NZ for Easter and I only got back last night.

I haven't read the threads I missed but I will try to over the next week or so.

PJs - got a bit of a shock coming back last night as it was low teens here. Jasmine wasn't wearing enough . I plan to put her in a thick sleeping bag (no idea what tog mine aren't Gro bags) with a long sleeve and long leg sleep suit (with feet) and a singlet. We will pop an extra blanket on her when we go to bed and I have some great flannel lined up to make her some PJ to go over her sleep suit if it gets that cold.

Related question Heating- when do you turn yours on? and what temp do you set it at? Never had to worry in the unit - only used it twice in three years. I think our is currently set for 20C - must try to track down a manual for it as I have no idea how to change it but doesn't have a timer so I can't set it to come on 30 mins before I get up .

OK time to see if I can start to catch up.

BBL (I hope)

Ali - umm no, I don't think so.. If I am then it will be a big surprise!

Sounds like you had a nice Easter Jots.

This sums me up perfectly. In my heart i want another but head says stupid
Velvet and going out is getting easier, financially it would make us stretched and then private school may not be an option for 3. Would I even cope with 3? But to hold and have another oh my heart melts
I CAN NOT make a decision ATM I have given myself until june to either make decision to TTC or not.
But every day I feel differently.

ho hum If someone has this answer I will kiss them

PJs : we wear flanny or long sleeve long leg, with 2.5 tog sleeveless bag and if really cold I will put a blanket over her when I go to bed too.

DH AWAY: LARA only for 3 weeks. 2 months that is just wrong, how will you do it without going insane?

CASSI: I only get strange dreams while PG too maybe you are, you always get a cold or sick when first PG

SHARON: thanks for the support, I know I wil be fine just hate lonley nights I do as you and normally clean and rearrange cupboards

I am a mess today. I feel so sick with stress. I have a meeting today at 4pm with mum and dad. I have finally (bullied) made mum give dad the answer she is not coming bacl It has been 6 months since the inncident and she has improved but only to a point and can't bring herself to tell him. I have been trying to get her (and other family/friends) to tell him but she is sh*t scared and so insucure about finances and what she will get.
I so hope it goes well and dad is not a d***head or else she is going to hate me forever for making her face up to this reality
But she can't 'hide and pretend' forever, she doesn't want to go back so she needs to tell time FINALLY, and he deserves to know after waiting this 6months to move on with his life

Lara - Unfortunately I am with Sarina and there is no answer! DH and I have decided that later in the year we are just going to throw caution to the wind and see what happens! I assume that means that I will get pregnant!

Sarina - glad that even with all tehe drama of your bday you still managed to have a good day. Hope that meeting goes well this afternoon - your DH has not left yet has he? Hope there is someone there for a cuddle when you get home.

Cassi - My DH was dreaming I was pregnant numerous times last week. Apparently dreaming of a baby means a new start so maybe that means the house will sell Hope you are feeling better soon.

Ali - How is Amelia this morning.

Jots - A trip to New Zealand sounds lovely looking forward to hearing about all your fun there

Elliesmum - how did the shirts you dyed yesterday turn out?

Blondie - I am glad that I helped to cheer you up yesterday I hope that you and DH are feeling better today, getting some stuff done around the house can be soul cleansing hope it works for him.

Meljas - We have a liver disease smurf we call him sometimes he is so yellow he is green - frequent abuse of panadeine forte caused his he is only 28! I swear he must glow in the dark!

Presentation for tomorrow complete and the assesment that everyone has to take as well - setting questions for tests is so hard whole new respect for those who write exams!

I am feeling chirpier today got lots of cleaning done although seriously if you looked at the house it is hard to tell - but I know I did it! Still very tired Kaidyn slept last night but DH was having nightmoares last night and Niamh was up at 5am. Only 4 more days till Sat and DH has promised he will not be oncall this weekend so might even get to see him!

I am here...

Key - if your heart desires it, you WILL get UTD by the end of the year! Is your DH a doctor also?
I cannot remember.

Sarina - is your dad expecting your mum to get her sh*t together after their 6 month break and go back to him? Surely he is not that nieve? How often do they see one another now?

Lara - what is taking your DH away all that time? Quick, TTC before he goes!
Maybe post something in the 'thinking of TTC' section and see what response you will get. If your heart is longing for it, then I think you are not yet finished.

Jotsmum - welcome back! You were missed! So lucky to have a holiday...hope Jasmine was a good girl for you.

Cassi - hope you feel better soon. xx Must be nice to be at home on your own.

Cassi - I hope the day at home fixes you up today. Interesting about the dream... hopefully Key is right and it means the house will sell!

Lara - obviously I am not at the same point as you yet wondering whether to have another but I'm sure that will be us after we have #2. I've always wanted 3 but DH I know would be happy with 2, and after our struggles this time I'm starting to think I will be grateful if I just get my second.

Jots - welcome home! I'd love to catch up with you and J soon, maybe we could meet at Macca's for a play one day next week if you have any free time? Heating - we are trying to wait before we turn ours on for the first time because we know once we do we will get used to warm and always want it on. We only have a gas heater in our main living room so no idea about temperatures.

Sarina - no wonder you are stressed, what a terrible mess and so awful for you stuck in the middle. I hope your mum is able to stay brave this afternoon and your dad behaves.

Key - well done getting prepared for tomorrow, I hope it goes well.

I finally got my exam result for the exam I did at the start of March, 35/40. Won't be quite enough for an HD for the subject but I'm still pleased, out of 64 students two others got 35 and only one student got 36 so it was obviously a tough exam and equal 2nd out of the class makes me quite proud .

Update.. Guy called and asked for price, so they are serious.. fingers crossed.

Key - I love dream interpretations, I hope its right!

Sharon - Its awesome being home alone.. Still running mild fever, I think I will just get into the panadol for work tomorrow.

Off to call DH and find out what was said...

sorry girls i wont be here to chat at kids sleep time, i need to go to sleep, i am stuffed.

but wanted to say lara if your heart wants it then i think you should go with it. remember that saying "you dont regret the kids you have only the ones you don't" or seomthing like that. you dont want to get to 50 and wish you had had one more. god sometimes i wonder how the hell i'll cope with three but i know i will somehow.

sharon - to answer for key - she is a pharmacist and i think her dh is in IT from what i remember. i used to think key was a dr too.

anyway bed is calling zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
sorry to answer for you KEY!!

hi all,

Key - good luck tomrrow with your presentation.. sending you 'yellow' vibes!

Blondie - great work on your exam! I know you went to uni before, but did you finish? I remember you saying something about it but not sure. you obviously havent lost your touch!

Lara - I'm not sure what you should do... I havent had my second yet, and I know that DH (and a little myself) would like to stop at 2 but it doesnt really feel like a last pregnancy to me... financially and logistically 3 just seems too much, on the other hand, having 2 siblings seems nice....
I hope you are going to be OK for 2 whole months! gosh that is a really long time...

Sarina - good luck this afternoon... what a stressful situation for you. I hope you cope. we are all here to listen to you vent if needed

we just got back from Alexander's first haircut! it didnt go that well.... he sat in my lap and cried alot and I am covered in hair. the woman was very nice and put on a video for him, but he's never watched TV (apart from some early morning soccor matches!) so wasnt sure what it was I dont think!
we went to JustCuts and it was free! apparently 1st haircuts are free there!
then we went to Target and got some slippers as they are having a big sale.
Also went to Cambells cash and carry (big wholesale warehouse) and got lots of cheap things as they are closing down. also got a trike for $5 (not sure of its quality!) so very happy about the trip! (except that I am very itchy from hair now!)

Don't take this the wrong way Ali but I really dislike that saying. I'm not saying anyone here should stop having kids, but I don't think having another child is always the right answer for every couple and I think that saying can be very emotive. Of course everyone wants to hold another newborn etc but there are some situations where adding another child to the family is not in the family's best interests for many reasons. Perhaps I'm too much of a pragmatist but I do think that considerations other than what the heart wants need to be made when deciding whether to have another baby. So in summary I think Lara and Sarina you are both doing the right thing making sure you are 100% sure, and whichever decision you make I hope you and your DHs are happy with it .

Cassi - that is great news!

ETA Melanie - that is a successful trip, I'm sure Alexander looks beautiful. What a good mother you are never letting him watch TV, I wish I could say the same. In answer to your question no I didn't finish my previous degree. I was studying Science/Law and I did finish the Science units I needed, but dropped out before I did my last year of Law, I'm sure if I had discussed it with the uni I probably would have had enough credits for a Science degree but I basically deferred and never went back so I'll never know.

Ali - oh thanks for clearing that up with Key! I am sure she wont mind and who knows - she might not be back in here till 2am! LOL. Just kidding Key.

I know for a fact that I would not cope emotionally with 3 young kids. I feel alone enough sometimes and was so very on the edge to PND after having H. I never want to go there again. Chaos makes me stress!

Blondie - each to their own I guess as we all have different situations. But valid point. I wonder what 'couldve been' after my m/c and Dh and I always say that peanut was our boy. I always knew I would just have 2. Ella is lucky she has a sibling at all, after her birthing experience! LOL.

I am enjoying looking towards the future now...not more nappies.

Blondie - if I were you I would call the uni and see if you can still get the science degree with the units you have done! I know they keep everything on record. no harm in trying anyway.

I also agree with Blondie about the saying. having another child (or in some people's case one!) is not always a good idea. other life stresses are real, and shouldnt be taken as if a child will make things better! It's a hard decision....

Cassi - hope they accept your price! how exciting!

I was just doing a quick journal search on the efficacy of raspberry leaf tea. I took it last pregnancy, and was thinking about starting it soon (also just because it is colder now and it's a good way of getting fluid!). though everything I found said there was no evidence for efficacy on the uterus at all so now I'm feeling a little bummed that I'll be drinking tea for no reason. very recent 2009 article very correctly made the point that just because it has been around for years, doesnt mean it actually works...!

Funny Meljas - I was thinking of avoiding the raspberry leaf stuff this time around, as I had such a quick labour this time that if it gets any quicker I'll be stuck at home.

I have reached that point of pregnancy where all I can do is stress about the labour....

I had a growth scan yesterday and the tech was dreadful. She kept asking me if my previous children were a 'normal size', and was this a 'normal pregnancy' then when i asked if this baby was measuring big or small she wouldn't say until the end.

Anyway = she said baby is measuring small, and was a bit doom and gloomish about it, but really, it is only measuring 30%, which is within normal limits and some babies have to be under 50%. Neither of my others were big anyway (3050g and 2095g) so I'm not concerned at all. Better than a big baby anyway.

The whole scan was a bit of a dud - I never saw anything that even resembled recognisable baby bits, the woman mumbled the whole time, and DD was there as she is sick and I had to let her 'plait' my hair the whole time as she was getting bored and upset. Talk about feeling like an object. The woman poking at my stomach, new baby moving around and DD yanking on my hair. Anyway - at least it is done. I see OB next week, but I doubt he'll be concerned either. The letter that came with the scans says 'normal' so I think the scan lady was just a panic merchant.

Lara - my answer to your question was just to 'see what happened'. You can see where that got us!

Yes, definitely one way to help make your mind up Seepi! Just let it happen and BD and see if nature takes its course! When I am not on the pill, I soooo know when it is O time so wasnt using anything after we had Ella, and never once had a 'scare'.

Better get this kid to swimming.

The teacher pulled me aside today and quietly asked if Dh and I had separated!!

Sharon - you should tell her you are a weather widow Isn't he due home for a visit soon (or did I miss that while I was away?) NZ was a busmans holiday. We got to catch up with some really great mates from the UK (over for the wedding) but then had to make the wedding cake, giveaway the bride, MC the reception and look after an 19mo. Seriously though it was great fun and I'm a bit bummed to be back tbh.

Blondie - that sounds great. Wednesdays are always pretty good for me. I'm with Meljas and reckon you should ring the uni. You might get a nice degree out of it.

Meljas - Can't bring myself to do Jasmines first haircut. She has come with me a couple of times and sat in the chair but she doesn't really have enough hair to cut yet. Although compared to my SIL nephew (if that makes sense) she has a mop! He is still bald at 2

Another question - Sorry I seem to be full of them today. Has anyone taken the littles to the dentist yet? I have tooth ache - which I am going to get seen to next week - and I suddenly realised it is probably time to introduce Jasmine to the dentist. She has 16 teeth.

gtg I actually have work to do

blondie I didnt mean that you shouldn't consider anything other than what the heart wants. i mean that would be silly for anyone to do that. Its not like i'd be saying to someone who was really really struggling financially to have another child because their heart wanted it and it would mean they'd end up on the poverty line or in a shelter or something. And i would never think a child would fix any problems or anything. we all know how hard work kids can be, and the stress they can put on relationships.
Basically my comment was based on yes things do get easier as they get older and it is harder to go back to a newborn again, but that period of time is so short in the grand scheme of things, that its over and done with before you know it, and perhaps the want for another one will never go until you do feel you're done? i dont know. all i know is how i feel and i knew i wasnt done which is why we decided to try again. yes things will definitely be tighter financially but we will tighten our belts more and are prepared to do this.
and of course deciding to have more/a child is something that both mother and father have to both agree on.
I guess when i typed before i was in a rush and didnt explain myself very well. i do remember that quote brought up by cath i think it was back when we were all discussing it months ago and its always stuck with me.
sorry if i offended anyone, i didnt mean to.

Don't worry Ali I wasn't offended, I think I've just seen that quote too many times in other threads on EB when someone is asking for advice on whether to have another, and I worry at times when it's a stranger with no regard for that person's psychological or financial situation, it's different with our group because we know each other better but I think it's quite irresponsible in some cases. So all good, I know where you are coming from .

Mel and Jots you are both right I probably should call the uni but it's something I keep putting off year after year. My experience at Melbourne Uni was such a negative one I go into a panic every time I think about it. I honestly can't even walk past the place without my chest tightening. I went through a really horrible time while I was studying there and have so many regrets about the choices I made.

Jots - let's set a date for next Wednesday then . How about 3pm at Macca's?

Seepi - how disappointing about the scan. Was there a particular reason they wanted you to have the scan? My uneducated opinion is that growth scans are a load of hooey. I had one with Claudia because she had a 2 vessel cord and they wanted to check on both growth and for abnormalities, I was told she would be about 8lbs and she was only just over 6. Unless there were very serious concerns I reckon I'd decline it next time.

DH and I have just been on a little expedition to a Mexican food wholesaler near the airport that I read about somewhere. We love our traditional Mexican (as opposed to Tex-Mex) food so stocked up on some gorgeous dried chillis that I've never seen in Australian before, along with black beans and masa to make our own tortillas. Very exciting! I've been wanting to get DH a tortilla press but the ones they had at this store were too small.

Hi girls,

Thanks to everybody for their input. I went into the thinking about concieving area of eb today and there was a person who had asked the same question and you girls were much more helpful with your advice. But that quote was used in that thread. It is really hard because DH doesn't want to make the decision either because he really wants another one as well. Oh well I think I will just have to keep thinking about it and see what happens. I have also found it really annoying because i had no troubles falling pregnant the first two times and this time it just isn't happening. So i suppose that could be the reason why i have start wondering if we should really keep trying. If i really can't be bothered trying do i really want it that bad.

Seepi - I wish you theory was that easy. Sorry that the technician was no help at your scan. I am also wondering why they have done a scan now?

Jotsmum - no dentist for us yet but i do need to take DD.

Sharon - my DH works for immigration and he is going to Christmas Island to help process the Assylum seekers.

I dont think there is a need to take your child to the dentist till around 4 years? But there is no harm if you are there, to get them into the chair to have a look and get used to it all.

Another self post, not good news here

Max got burnt this afternoon. I was at work and DH took the boys to grandparents this afternoon and they have an underbench oven. MIL was cooking scones and Max put his hands on the oven, he has second degree burns, he's pretty bunged up, all banaged and of course miserable.

I was wondering where they were when I got home and when DH walked in the door with Max and told me what had happened I think I felt my heart literally break, I just broke down

Anyway have to go.

Littlemum - oh no poor Max and poor mummy. What a fright for you. I hope he heals quickly.

Omg Little Mumma! That bought tears to my eyes! Your poor little baby! What a rough time you are all having! Did he go to the dr or hossy? Was it all fingers and both hands?
Oh hugs for him and also for you. How upsetting.

Oh Max! Poor little guy! for you and Max littlemumma.

Oh Littlemumma that's terrible. It's so easy to do as well - Ivy put her hands on the outside of the oven the night before last then screamed the house down. It wasn't 'burning' hot but obviously enough to cause her pain. I didn't even realize the danger until it had happened.... I hope Max heals quickly.

Lara the TTC decision is so loaded these days - money, work, freedom, houses, cars... so much comes into play. I also have the feeling I'm not done yet - and I'm 27w PG! Perhaps that will change once I have a toddler and a newborn on my hands... good luck reaching whatever decision is right for you...

'You only regret the babies you don't have' agree that this phrase is both useful and overused! I'd say if you were almost convinced and just needed a nudge, this or a similar saying could be it. Then again, if you are really 50/50, or like BBear says poor, depressed (and maybe with a dodgy relationship), the saying is no use at all!

BBear curious about your uni experience. My biggest regret about uni was going to a dull provincial one (Uni Southern Qld, Toowoomba), going as a 'mature age' student (20, a full two years older than my classmates!), and attempting something I really didn't enjoy (accounting). So they were ok years but not the non-stop drunken party that I envisaged. I finished off externally doing PR and sociology, more my bag but also not really 100% what I would do if I had my time over. If I had my time over, I would study radiology or something and sleep with a lot of medical students, or maybe even a professor! Lay for an A! See, it's my doctor thing, repressed from my uni days!

BBear #2 I wouldn't even know what to do with a mexican chili. Put it in tequila? Bake it into creme caramel (you know, the spanish version)? My spanish is coming along admirably now that the Wiggles pepper their DVDs with spanish-language songs!

Jots welcome back from your globetrotting. So great how you travel with kids... something I'm not yet brave enough to do. We don't have any heating so can't answer your question about when to start using. Around 10-13 degrees, I reckon?

Seepi I've never heard of an accurate late scan like you had. They say 'you've got a whopper!' and out pops a little bean, or vice versa. Shame you had a weird techy person as well. She obviously did not sleep with enough medical students at uni (see my note to BBear above).

MelJas I gave the raspberry tea a bit of a try, don't think it contributed much and I didn't really take to it. None this time round. Tiny tacker can stay put for as long as she likes. My uterus will just have to grin and bear it, so to speak.... oh that sounds foul.

Cassi sounds promising with the sale! Fingers crossed, and legs also (gingerly, due to pelvic twinges)

Ellangel I think you already have a third child, named melaleuca

Me had a busy day doing some freelance work, getting house ready for rental inspection (all good, no hassles there), going to TAFE, then coming home and entertaining grumpy bum. She is much better at daycare but obviously not a huge fan... got some cool toys from the toy library (little plastic slippery slide castle thing and a little kitchen) to sweeten her up, plus shared icecream with her at dinner. She is eating like a horse at the moment, funny how one minute you worry at how little they eat, the next you're worried that they will eat themselves silly! Tried to read a book by vietnamese monk thich nat something... in keeping with my 'happiness' list that I put online a few days ago about being spiritual. Unfortunately I am more of a shallow pond than first thought: when he said that he wandered around and saw dying flower buds, then a few days later new flower buds, and he asked them 'are you the same flower buds', and the flower buds said 'we are not the same and we are not different!' I had a brain spasm and thought 'well what is it? same? different? gah too obscure!' so no more thich nat thingy for me. Need something more literal, perhaps a children's bible? Something with pictures of animals.

Littlemumma - How awful. I hope your baby boy Max is ok and you are ok as well.

Oh LittleMumma - that is terrible. Poor little Max. I'm sure he will be fine, but he must be so confused. i would be devastated.
Grandparents just do not think sometimes. Mine are always doing dopey things like showing DD how to open the front door....
big hugs to Max. I hope he heals up really quickly.

Late scan = my ob has had one done every time. he said in 95% of cases all is normal, but he likes to do it just to check things out. I think it is just a quirk of his. I was hoping to get 100% girl confirmation, but it is so squashy in there now that they can't get a good view of the bits. Anyway I went and picked up the films and letter today and it says 'within normal range' so I'm not worried. the tech could definintely work on her manner though.

It is going to be 1 degree here overnight. i wish we had gas heating. Jasper is in flannel PJs, 2.5 tog bag (pink!), socks and singlet. With column heater on very low in his room also. No heater in our room yet....I sleep well under lots of doonas, but it is hard to get up in the morning when the room is icy. Let alone in the middle of the night. so I'm sure the heater will come back out of the garage, even if our power bill is always huge through winter.

tks guys, I feel like vomiting, seriously. DH is beside himself, blames himself but accidents happen. Sharon - fingers and hand but only one hand is dressed and bandaged, oh and DH took him to GP who rushed him straight in, he screamed for 1.5 hours.

I felt like crying when I put him to bed and he went to suck his thumb but couldn't as it was all bandaged.

We have taught him hot etc and MIL told him the oven was on and that it was hot but he's a baby and they are inquisitive.

OH you poor thing Littlem! Was DH there when it happened? I hope he manages to get some sleep.

OH BG! I tried to laugh but couldnt - have a facemask on and it is set like concrete!! Melaleuca brand of course!

DD1 told all her friends at school that her daddy had gone to' live in Melbourne with the slams'...I think she meant 'trams'. LOL Off to watch Greys

Hope little Max is ok littem. Dont beat yourself up about this though. Babies are inquisitive as you said....we cant watch them all the time and accidents do and will happen. Poor little man.

hugs to you all

Oh Littlemumma, huge hugs to you and Max, what an awful accident, I hope you both manage to get some sleep and that his hands heal quickly.

Seepi, all the cutest little boys are tucked up in their beds in pink grobags

Bellygood, your mind goes in some very strange circles sometimes! Have you ever been to a Billy Connolly show? You should!

Planning no.3. We never really made the decision, we were talking about it, and thinking about it and just didn't do anything to prevent it. DH has talked a bit about no.4, but this time I've been the practical one and said NO! It's just as well we started late as I would love to be pregnant continually! I'd end up in an asylum though.

Sarina, hope the meeting was OK, you really did need to force the issue, they've had you stuck in the middle for too long.

Cassi, hope they agreed to your price. Hmmm, wonder why you're dreaming about pregnancy

Lara, 2 months will be hard, not sure how I'd go. Christmas Island doesn't exactly sound like a holiday at the moment either, a bit of a no-win situation really.

Blondiebear, phone that Uni, it sounds like you need to get something out of them for closure. If you're entitled to a degree you should have the piece of paper to say so. Hope you and your DH get to spend a bit of time together while his work is slow, might make up for some of the long hours he does the rest of the time.

Ali, hope you have had a good sleep and wake up refreshed.

Key, where do you get all your energy from? I think I need some.

Had a tough couple of days here, DH really struggled with his chemo yesterday and was threatening to cancel his last one next week. I think he's realised he needs to finish though. The kids and I were meant to go to the zoo today with some school friends, but the weather wasn't good so we went bowling and then to Hungry Jacks instead. I'm worn out and seriously need sleep, it just isn't happening though so I try to tire myself out more at the computer. I put the late night to good use yesterday and made DD some really cute hairclips, think I need to do more creative stuff instead of watching TV or sitting here eating chocolate.

Beagle - one for you and one for DH. I hope DH can hang in there for the last treatment. Yes you sound exhausted, sounds like you can't switch off, I can only hope things get better for you guys. xx

Lara - wow sounds like your DH's job would be very stressful/interesting at the same time. I bet it's tough having to meet all those poor people face to face and make a decision about whether they're entitled to come to Aus.

Bellygood - Sounds like your uni experience was almost the opposite of mine, mine was the non-stop drunken shagfest! Like you I chose the wrong degree to study, I did really well in Year 12 and somehow had ingrained in my head that if you get a TER of 99+ you have to do Medicine or Law, regardless of whether you're interested in them. I so wish I'd done Journalism in the first place, it's what I wanted to do as a child and funnily enough I have come back to my original dreams.

Mexican food - We toast the chillis and puree them with other ingredients like onion, tomato, garlic, coriander and make moles (that's mo-lays not the burrowing animal ) for enchiladas or meat. Our favourite dish is a slow cooked pork mixed with all those yummy flavours, shredded and served in fresh tortillas with salsa and guacamole.

Seepi - brrrr to your 1 degree. I'm sick of winter already and it hasn't even started yet! March was so beautiful here, gorgeous sunny day after gorgeous sunny day, and all of a sudden the weather sucks.

Ellangel - lol at your 3 babies, Ella, Holli and Melli!

Beagle - Glad to hear DH is not going to cancel his chemo, I can't imagine what a horrible experience it must be. No good about your lack of sleep. Have you tried yoga/meditation? Perhaps 15 minutes of stretching and deep breathing might relax your body and mind before you go to bed, just a thought.

OK, this morning I really need to finish my book review so I can submit the assignment (same one with the poetry). I'm writing a review of No Country For Old Men (the book), it's only 850 words but I'm struggling to fill it, it's much harder than I thought.

A: it should have been me! Fiddle faddle with Toowoomba farm boys = dull! 'Anatomy' lessons with urbane med students - fun! Bah.

B: no Old El Paso kits in your household

Beagle oh man no wonder you are exhausted. You need to find a way to switch off. I wish I had some suggestions, I would be the same as you in your situation.

I have been up since sparrow fart getting my freelance work done.

Question for everyone: I just did some quick sums comparing what I earn as a freelancer for about 15 hrs/week (eg what I do now) vs what I would earn part-time in a mid-level Qld Public Service position (eg my goal to work for Qld Health). Once I take into account childcare costs for two kids for three days per week, I earn more as a freelancer right now. Plus I find daycare a PITA TBH. Further, mid-level public service positions are rare in a regional town like the one we live in, most are lower level + poorer paid.

All of which makes it hard to decide if/when to go back to work. It won't be until at least mid 2011, all going well with baby. I suppose there's no point thinking about it until then? Also, it's kind of a temporary problem as working five days / week, school hours, will be no problem once the kids are in school... maybe that's the time to return to the workforce?

Sometimes feel that my 'career' (not that I'm overly ambitious) is totally parked right now, and pretty much buggered for the next 10 yrs because I'll work part time at most. There might be some miraculous rewarding part time job come up, but more than likely I'll be 'underemployed'. All the while, DH is powering ahead! Not that it's a contest and I know the whole household benefits, but where does it leave me if he drops dead?

I just know that some of you are working a few days a week, even full time. Question: Would you do this if you had a work-at-home choice, like I do? What are the cost/benefits, for you?

Beagle - biggest hugs to you and your family. I hope DH can be brave enough to do his last round of chemo. I imagine when he is feeling really bad he doesn't want to do it anymore.

Blondie - my DH is pretty hard line about the whole Assylum seeker thing and he won't be making direct decisions about where they are going he is just in charge of managing their cases. So making sure that the case officers are doing their jobs correctly.

@ work today and still feeling a bit bleagh, tired and having trouble concentrating..

BG - Its an interesting scenario, I have been pondering the same sorts of Q's. I think if I had a well paying job that I could do from home like you do then I would pounce on it. N would still go to CC but maybe only 1 day or 2 half days per week. I have been wondering about when the right time comes to be staying home and doing the housewife thing and paying for CC for 1 is bad enough, I am thinking I might be stay at home muumy after #2 for a while longer until N is at school when I have the opportunity to go back to work in school hours maybe, or by then the oldies may have retired and can take care of the kids for us.
Returning to the workforce once the kids start school you still have to find care for them for the 12ish weeks school holidays they get as well which I am finding it hard to get my head around. Between DH and I we can cover 8 but that leaves no family holiday time if we ever have the cash to go away.
In the end I think we will just have to jump those hurdles as we come to them and make decisions on what suits at that point in time. Who knows what can happen in those next few years.

littlemumma, I hope Max is feeling better this morning..

:wave: to everyone else.. I need to try and get some work done..

Bellygood I'm obviously not the best person to ask because I'm back at uni hoping to end up with a job just like yours! Freelance writing or editing from home is exactly what I want to do, at least while I have young children. The thought of giving that up to work in the public service does not sound like a positive change to me, but diff'rent strokes for diff'rent folks. One of the reasons I'm studying rather than going back to work is for the reasons you mentioned, with my current skill set/qualifications I wouldn't be able to earn good money, and slaving away for 40+ hours a week in a job I'm not passionate about, only to give half of it away in child care fees doesn't appeal to me at all.

littlemumma How is Max today? poor little darling. Yes accidents happen, I hope DH isn't beating himself up still.

beagle Yeah it does sound like you are having trouble 'switching off'. Can't blame you. Hope DH does finish his last chemo.

bellygood I'd love to be able to work from home! What qualifications do you need to do editing? PM me if you like. I have no idea what i'll be doing. Yes I'm an RN but would want to do a refresher by the time I went back to work, been too long without working in the clinical setting I'd feel like a fish out of water. I like blondie dont see the point in earning not a lot of money and paying for CC. Espec as i'd have 2, maybe 3 in CC. But of course we coudl all do with the money. To me, working from home in the hours that suit you would be absolutely ideal!!
With the public service, I think that woudl be good to work for. My DH works for PS and gets flex days, a coulple a month from when he's done overtime etc. Ok not fabulous money but the security is good. However in a regional town, as you say there isn't much work.. hmm. perhaps just keep doing what you're doing and see what happens?
I'm not exactly ambitious career wise either, but then again sometimes i do wonder what woudl happen to me work wise if DH decided to run off with another woman. (not that he would but you know what i mean!)

My morning sickness is back. This happened with DD and DS too toward the end.
Have an OB appt at 1130. Taking both kids..this will be interesting. I have already been told that I'll most likely have to wait around for a while as the OB starts holidays tomorrow so today is jam packed. Might ring before i leave and see how far behind she is. Trying to confine Oliver to the stroller for any length of time, espec when DD is running around is near impossible. I have put lots of goodies in the backpack ready. hopefully food will distract him!

LittleM - How terrible! burns are just awful. as it heals get some silver sulfadizine. it is the best thing for burns (silver is a wonderful healer - back me up Key). you can keep it in the fridge for YEARS ( I say that as it is rather expensive - plus in my family we kept one for about 10 years in the back of the fridge - worked wonderfully). obviously though, follow the Dr/nurses advice for bandage changing to reduce the likelyhood of bad scaring

Beagle - to you too! I can imagine that your DH is pretty over it by now (as you must be). you are doing so well. I would have had a break down by now. WHat are you PIL doing for you? I remember you said they were a bit hopeless, but you havent mentioned them at all, and your Mum has gone all the way to help from the east coast, twice....! just wondering of you need to kick them a little. would DH want more of their support?


this is my experience too by the end of 2nd year I changed to a arts/nursing degree from my original one, as I just wasnt 'feeling' it. I went off the rails a little in the 1st 2 years. maybe should have taken a break between school and uni. If i went back i would do things differently, but hey, it wasnt too bad. I met DH in 3rd year and we moved in together, and things got moderately better
Blondie - DH got a super high score for his TER and did a plain ARTS degree! I really wish he had down dentistry... sooo much more money in that than academia... ! but he followed his heart at least I suppose.

BG - did you watch Insight last night on SBS? they were talking about this exact subject! I dont know what I would do. I would love to work in the pub service, but all the 'good' jobs are in Canberra. I've spend enough time there....! (sorry Lara and Seepi! - but I did grow up there, so can say it!) At the moment I am 'happy' (read unsatisfied but getting paid + good to be doing something so my resume isnt blank) doing what I am doing. but I will want to get a 'real' job when the kiddlets are at school... just not sure what at this stage! I would like to go back to nursing 1 day a week, but it seems a little unlikely that they will take me for that at this stage as I havent been working as a nurse for so long now.

Lara - I would love to work in Customs or Immigration! but I would have to start at the bottom (how many positions require a nursing/arts degree and a masters of health management?!) so not looking like an option. even my secod language is not really a help.. I dont even know any Germans who come out here who dont speak english!


should go to work soon *sigh*....

Melanie sounds like we were very alike but you got your act together quicker than I did! What was your original degree? I also went off the rails in 1st and 2nd year, then met my DH in 3rd year, but unfortunately didn't move in with him so he didn't get the chance to put me on the straight and narrow. I continued living with my pot smoking friends and frittering away all my money and brains . My DH was another one who didn't do one of the 'expected' degrees with his high TER, he did Chem Eng/Science, I think it was the right choice for him though he's very suited to being an engineer.

Ali good luck with the kids at the appointment today, I have a tough enough time keeping just Claudia occupied if I'm at the doctors. I'm still so jealous every time I read about one of you going to your OB appointments and getting towards the end of your pregnancies . Can't believe how far behind I am now. One of my two pregnant MG friends has her first OB appointment today and is feeling nervous about it but as I told her I've taken TWO for the team so out of 8 of us who are close friends there should be no more bad news.

BG - I did some freelance from home when I had DD1 and it was the biggest mistake. I was constantly stressed about it, hated feeling like I had to think about work all the time at home, and also i underquoted badly, so I did heaps of work for not much money.Also I found doing tax etc much more complicated. And I hated issuing invoices/chasing up money etc.

So for me, going out to work has been much easier. Part time I quite enjoy. I like the social aspect of work, and the child free shopping at lunchtime! I don't do the sums on how much better off we are after parking fees, buying lunch, childcare etc, cos I dont' want to be depressed, but we definitley come out ahead. and meanwhile I hang onto my job (mid-level public service), for later on.

Getting out the door in the morning is very hard, and I can now understand why some women work 5 days, but from 10-3 or whatever. but being at work gives me something to think about besides baby clothes and which are the best pre-schools, which is good.

Still = it sounds like you have your freelance sorted out to have good regular clients. So I would hang onto that for the time being, and keep studying as long as it is intersting. It is always good to have options for later on.

Morning

Thanks so much for the support last night, think I was at breaking point, seriously....didn't get much sleep but I do feel better today.

Max was happier this morning...although he managed to get the dressing and bandage off through the night. He actually slept fairly well as the Dr told us to give him penadol and nurofen together, think it knocked him out We changed the dressing this morning...blisters are BIG and on hand and fingers but they haven't popped yet which I am told is good. Melanie The Dr prescribed Max creamed called fluxidine or something (can't remember) but it says underneath the name ""Silver Sulfadzine" and we were told to keep it in the fridge so we must be on the right track.

Sorry haven't caught up on other posts, will come back a little later.

LittleM - good. glad you have the SSD cream. and glad the blisters havent popped

Growth scans - I forgot to say, I had one with ALexander at 38 weeks or so as the midwife thought he was big. did scan. said he was 3.7kg, everyone happy.... born 2 weeks later at 4.7kg! so I never believe them now. I also know of lots of people who have had the opposite, 'big' babies coming out smaller.

Blondie - I started with a 'liberal studies' degree (made up Sydney University degree with Arts/science and language - 4 yrs). it was something I thought I wanted to do as I'm a big art and scienc-y. but I had a panic that I was not going to 'be' anything when I finished! ie I was going to have to do a post grad degree (medicine/pharmacy) straight away. so nursing was a good choice for me I think (although parents tried to talk me out of it -even though both trained as nurses!).
I think DH is suited to academia too, but wish he earned more money he is a little disillusioned with his topics of research at the moment, but he will get back into it (also stress of work and new baby coming).

I can understand your jealousy. I was like that too after my mc. but dont think you are 'behind' because no one is counting, and you will still have kiddies very close together!

Ali - good luck at the OB. I would call and change the appointment if they are behind. I also have trouble trying to entertain just one child at the Drs....!

Flights are booked to Sydney! Leave next Thursday and arrive back the following Tuesday after the public holiday. I am so excited...something to look forward to.

Thinking of you today Sarina, as you say goodbye to your DH.

Littlem - you are not at work today are you? Glad Max is doing ok.

really quickly asJasmine is soo stroppy and overtired and yet won't fall asleep!

Blondie - 3pm at Maccas next wed is in the diary

Beagle -

LIttleM - Glad Max is OK. can't have been nice to come home and find everyone gone.

gtg screaming has intensified

Holli now yells out to me in her cot when she wakes up! Anyone else's bub just started doing this? "Mum!" what happened to mummy? Dont know if its cute or annoying, especially at 6am.

Also, today she was watching Barney and she said, "see saw, up and down" 1st sentence I think! Been saying 2 words for awhile.

Better go finish off the last of the birthday cake. Someone's gotta do it.

Sharon - yes Max also yells out Mum over and over again until I go and get him out of the cot. Clever Holli saying her first sentence. Great you are coming to Sydney, will see what the girls arrange and see if I am able to visit too.

In relation to the conversations about work - I think working in general once you have had kidlets is hard work. I have done the long commute to Sydney 3 days a week from the time bub was 7 months...was a killer. Now doing 3 days around the corner from home with friendly hours of 930am - 430pm, much more suited to family life. CC costs we fortunately don't worry about as we have grandparents who are more then willing to help out.

I'm not sure I would want to work from home, it would depend....I wouldn't want to be tied down every day to doing work at home but probably wouldn't mind if it was just a few set days a week and thats it.