Running question in a few threads. Need answers urgently
My DD's biological father is not on her birth certificate, due to violent behaviour, only one recorded to the police (event occured between my dad and my ex).
He has now told me that he has gone to Legal Aid and they have told him he can just go into Birth Registary and someone there would sign on my behalf and he could get his name on the birth certificate. I don't believe him, but I have no way of confirming it at 10pm at night.
He has also said that there will be mediation and then the courts will allow him to take my DD for a day a week, eventually for as long as he wants. He says the court would rule in his favour if I refused to have anything to do with the court case, and if I moved without telling him where I went, then he could call the police and I would be charged with kidnapping.
Is this all bullcrap? Is there anyway I can have him not on the birth certificate, or if he manages to get testing and is put on it, can I request supervised visits?
He is back in sydney with his junkie friends, he has had a drug addiction on and off for years, and his mother is a pot-head and alcoholic. I don't want Sienna anywhere near him or his mother. Who should I speak to? Can legal aid help, or only once their is a court case?

Sorry but it is all CRAP!!

From my sisters experience with my neices biological father and the birth certificate, absolutely nothing can be done without both parties consent. Sounds like he is trying to freak you out. Also, my understanding with visting rights etc is that if you can not reach a private agreement then a court would have to reach one for you - no one can just decide that stuff without your involvement.

So sorry this is happening to you.

All the best.

Mel
DH - Tim
DS - Ayden born 06.04.05 - 9.1oz (4.1 kilos)

According to the ACT Parentage Act, if you and your ex were in a domestic relationship between 20 and 44 weeks before the birth of your DD, then he is presumed to be her father.

Steph

hI,

I AM going through exactly the same thing ATM and my daughters father is also not on her birth certificate either. He hasnt seen her for 7 years and now wants access overnight and half the holidays!!!!!
He was also violent to me when i was pregnant.
Try not to listen to his threats because thats all that they are.

If you need to talk to someone then you can PM me because i know exactly what you are going through,

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I'd get some legal advice. It sounds like crap to me and I wouldn't think he could do what he is saying. But, as far as I know, noone here is an expert in this and thats what you need. Call legal aid, even if it's just to confirm what we think. This is not worth getting wrong.

Kylie Purdie<BR>Mum to Luke 19/4/02<P>

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I can’t go into too many details with my own personal experience. But the family law courts may act in the best “interests” of the child but they only know what you tell them.

Steph is right, he more then like will be presumed the father and more then likely the courts will ask for a paternity test.

Get your self a solicitor, Baker Deane and Nutt really helped me. Be the first to jump up and say what you want to say. That really helped my ex who called my PND a mental illness, it took me over a year to prove that I could look after him even though I had post natal depression. And for 3 months of that year I didn’t see my son unless it was “as agreed between parties”.

Ask your solicitor to have his contact “as agreed between parties” then there is no real time’s or date’s etc.

Both myself and my Ex tried to get supervised contacts and the courts refused both of us, without solid proof that the other party cannot provide care alone for the child.

Also ask for a parenting report. This is where a child phycologist sits with you (and your new partner if you have one) and the child, talks to you for about 2 hours and then sits and talks to your partner and the child for the same time. Then writes a report on where the child is more likely to get the best possible care.

Our parenting report was done by Sue Connor’s. And I would have to say she if fantastic. She is just so great, and she is the reason I have 86% of the care for Alexander. But in saying that she really does get the truth out of both sides, and there is a psychological assessment that both parents need to do.

I just want to add one last thing, the courts are really reluctant to move a child from where they are currently happy. I.e. if your child has been happy, healthy, going to school or play groups has regular friends here with you then the courts aren’t happy to move them.

I know its going to sound bad, but when DS is old enough (4) to start a weekend sport he will because that also impacts on the care the other party get especially if the other party live in another state. I’m sorry, I had to spend a lot of time and money on having my son my 86% and I intend on him having a normal life, with friends and weekend sports the lot.

Hi Red.Queen,

I can't offer any advice to you about this as I have no understanding of what his rights are but it does sounds like he is just trying scare and upset you.

I am so sorry that you have to experience this pain when all you probably want to do it get on with your life and enjoy your bub.


I can only imagine how hard this must be for you as our children are the most important thing in our lives and we want to do anything we can to protect them. I wish you all the best and I hope he realises he's wasting his time trying to get to you and gives up.

Beclowe - my thoughts are with you too. It must be so hard to have him walk back in after 7 yrs and want all that contact with your daughter.I would be so frustrated.

Lisa 25

You may run into a problem with legal aid if they are already representing your ex. Its been a long time since I studied family law and the legislation changed right after I did, so I'm afraid I'm no help there. However, you may like to try First Stop. Its a legal centre run by ANU law students in conjunction with other firms doing pro bono work. It's a legal service for young people (from memory its 12-25 but I may be wrong). they are located in the civic bus interchange opposite the cinemas or you could call them. they are a good place to go to get inital advice and referrals

Good luck

I have spoken to legal aid, all they did was read infomation off their website, which was pointless because I could have done that ( and did yesterday).
Also contacted the Births and Deaths registary and they have given me details so I can fax a letter through to Manager of Operations and a stop will be put on my DD birth certificate, meaning he can't get a copy or put his name on without a letter from me plus my photo id. So yes he was lying when he said he could get it done without me. Only my power of attorney can sign on my behalf.
Without proven paternity testing, and a court order he can't go on the birth certificate.
I have an appointment on wednesday with a family lawyer, thankfully my best friend is his assistant, and she has told me in regards to visits if a court order is granted, I can make it on the provision that his blood and urine tests are drug and
alcohol free. If he is unable to produce drug free alcohol and
blood tests, then he doesn't get visits. ALSO it starts off as
hourly supervised visits. then eventually gets longer and longer. If I can prove his background (he has police record of drug possesion with intent to sell, and also assault against police, violent behaviour and assault with intent against my dad which he pleaded guiltly to), that will be taken into account. I will have to pay for the legal help on wednesday, but I know John is a good solicitor (sp?), and I would rather that, then the gamble of legal aid. Will update when I know.

Hi, this may be too late, but there is an excellent Women's legal service that can assist in these type of situations

Women's Legal Centre
legal advice - 6257 4499 / 1800 634 669
Monday to Friday 9:30am to 12 noon

As well as phone advice, you can set up an appointment to speak to a lawyer. Phone the same # to make an appointment.

http://www.womenslegalact.org/

The Womens Information referral centre can also provide advice and refer you to appropriate services. their website is:
http://www.wirc.act.gov.au/

Hope this helps,
Amanda