Recently the MACH nurse suggested that DS and I go to QEII as DS has started waking lots during the night and is becoming difficult to settle during the day.
DS is only 15 weeks and I don't want to go if they are just going to leave him to cry. I feel like I have failed and would like to try and sort things out myself but am worried it will just get worse.
I am interested in hearing from anyone who has been to QEII for sleep issues. What sort of methods do they use, did you find it useful etc?
Thanks

I went to QEII for b/f issues when DS#1 was around 14-15 weeks, but we also worked on the sleep thing as well. They pretty much do leave them to cry - but not for very long at that age. From memory we would leave him to cry for 2 mins, then go in and comfort for 2 mins, then back out for 2 mins etc. I don't think they recommended to leave for any longer than that until around 6 months. They do it for you if you can't handle the crying and let you go somewhere else.
It did work very well though and i had a great sleeping child after that.
You do get used to the crying very quickly - i had no problems doing it a little with DS#2 myself at home this time.
I remember some of the older babies/todlers being left to cry for much longer times though.

If controlled crying is definitely not for you, it is probably worth trying to find another solution than QEII.

FYI - they couldn't fix the b/fing problems though!


Kat (30)
DH (30)
DS 08/08/03
DS 26/01/05

Bluebell, I went to QE2 when Kya was 3 months old for night sleep and settling problems. I was not keen on controlled settling and made that known from the start, so they worked through a 'revised' program for me. I think that their willingness to deviate from plan is quite dependent upon the nurse that is in charge of you, as some of them are pretty much by the book. I believe that I was quite lucky.

Before we went there, we did the Lanyon day stay - and wouldn't you know it, my little trickster slept perfectly the whole time we were there, no settling issues, and needed to be woken so that they could help me with a feeding issue! [She also did this the first night at QE2 and I thought that they were going to brand me a fraud and send me home - they didn't, apparently this is quite common]

Agree with Sarah - the food is crap. It is only free if you go in as a medicare patient. If you have private health, it does cost.
Partners can stay (I think this was $15 bed and breakfast). Mine stayed one night and then just came for the evening and went home, (he bought his dinner over and ate it there - there is a little kitchen for food preparation etc) as he found he wasn't getting enough sleep to be able to concentrate at work (you cab hear other bubs crying during the night as well as your own). As long as your partner is supportive of the method that you use, I think that this works OK (them not being there full time).

Also - they have a spa for a bit of relaxation, and a lady that does aromatherapy massages for $20. There are talks every morning on different issues. You need to take your own nappies (they have terry flats provided) and they have a washing machine for general use.

I cant think of anything else, but pm me if you need more info.I recommend it highly. Do go - it allows you to catch up on badly needed rest - it is a bit like a holiday



I make milk - whats your superpower?

Just thought that I would add a recommendation for a great book - the no cry sleep solution by Elisabeth Pantley. Also a book that (the fantastic) nurse recommended to me at QE2, but I haven't got, was "No one right way" not sure fo the author - but that book was what she based the not doing cc on for Kya.
Amanda

I second the No Cry Sleep Solution - I used this when my first child was 4 months old with great success. I will be starting the same with my second on 30 Jul (I've set myself a date to start).

If you're interested in the book - here's a site with excerpts http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/newslette...leepbookann.htm

I've been to QEII twice and it's wonderful. You will come away having had a rest from everyday life plus with some skills in settling etc.

They made it very clear to me that if I was not happy with controlled comforting, they would work with an alternative method - I think that's their approach. Their preference is controlled comforting, which is varied, depending on the age of the baby/child but they understand that some mothers do not want to go that way.

Deb

I have been there recently with my 16m DD. I had just spent about 2-3w putting together a good pre-nap routine for DD's day sleep (which apart from general exhaustion due to non-parenting factors was my main problem) which included lunch, quiet play, nappy change, books, cuddle then bed. They insisted on putting DD into the cot at her first tired sign, which resulted on two days in her crying for 1/2h in the cot. Funnily enough, after taking her out, giving her lunch and the usual pre-nap activities she settled for a 2h afternoon sleep.

I got seriously sick of being told that "most babies this age are still having two day sleeps" - DD had been having one day sleep for months and anyway since when does every baby HAVE to be "average"!? I went home a day early as I got sick and won't be asking for a readmission.

Yes the food is terrible - I found it way too salty and DD wouldn't touch it. If you have private health you can still be admitted under Medicare which is what I did - it doesn't make any difference to what you get.

The counsellor is wonderful and I spent a long time with her on my 2nd day there getting some really useful help - pity you can only see her if you are an in-patient doing the 5 day program.

Overall I felt their program was good for people with feeding or sleep/settling problems who were willing to do the controlled/modified comforting. If you are going for sleep/settling you have to do a seminar first where you will find out what their philosophy is. I don't agree with it and certainly in my DD's case their claim that "babies who are put to sleep by BFing/rocking/cuddling etc will not be able to resettle when they wake during the night" is complete BS.

If you have a problem that's a bit different to usual or don't agree with their philosophy I think they will struggle to help you. Unfortunately for mothers in these situations there is nowhere else to go...



Steph
DD Alex (March 04)