Well I am at a loss at what I can do to get my son Xavier to sleep most of the way through the night. He is nearly 18 months old and for the past couple of months has woken up every 3 - 4 hours every night!!
The last two nights DF and I have brought him into bed with us, but we don't want to encourage this.
He wakes up and cries until we come in, and even after a bottle and a change of nappy with settles him usually, he still stands up in his cot and cries...
I work full-tim as does DF and I desperately need some advice as to how I can deal with this problem....

Yours in sleep deprivation.

Im having the same problem with my much younger DS.
He wakes at night and wont settle until he is in bed with us. I think that the only solution is the control crying method. Persistance is the key here but how hard is that when you work!
I work nights and by the time i come home im to tired to be up and down all night settling him so he usually gets put in bed with us.

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Hi Brimsey,

Sorry to hear that you're having such a tough time at night these past few months. I know how you feel as this was happening with us until just recently when we finally managed to get DS to sleep through.

Here's what we did to encourage him to sleep. Just before bedtime DH gives DS a relaxing bath. He's dried and dressed in his pyjamas (singlet, nappy, all-in-one jumpsuit with flannelette pyjamas on top) and then given his dinner. As soon as he's finished, we let him have a little playtime and then we give him a big drink of warm milk. By the end of this he is normally ready to go to sleep so we put him in his cot.

In his room we've got a column heater running all night on the lowest setting to keep the chill off. We have a CD player playing lullabies on repeat very quietly. We have flannelette sheets on the bed with a mink blanket on top. And we have a couple of small soft toys in the corners. He goes to sleep with a dummy as we've found this helps with his teething aches and pains (he normally spits it out once he's asleep but he can find it easily enough as it's clipped to his pyjamas). Once he's in bed we shut the door.

Now comes the crunch time.

If he wakes during the night we let him cry for a while and usually he goes back to sleep. However, if he sounds like he's working up to a screaming session we normally go in and lie him back down, tuck him in and replace the dummy, soothing him with 'back to sleep bubby', 'everything is fine', 'mummy/daddy is here' and 'you're okay'. And then we walk out and close the door.

If he starts up again we leave him for a while unless he starts working himself up again. Even then we still leave him to cry it out for at least ten minutes if not longer.

If he really is distressed then he comes in with us and has a bottle of warm milk and a cuddle with us. As soon as he's calmed down and starting to drift off we take him back to his cot. And 99% of the times he just goes off to sleep. For the 1% of times that he doesn't it normally means that something is wrong, ie. sore gums. We give him a small dose of nurofen and this normally works a treat.

I know it's hard to leave them when they are crying and screaming so loudly but take it from me (a big softy) it is really the best thing to do. It's the only way that they learn to put themselves back to sleep. I used to always want to bring DS in with us as soon as he made the slightest sign of a cry but this just made things hard for us as I never got any sleep. One thing is for sure, if you don't want him in your bed at night then you have to be cruel to be kind ... to you all.

I hope some of my rambling might help. Good luck.

Cheers,
Helen.
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I agree totally with Helen. We had sleep issue a couple of weeks back that had been going on for about 8 weeks. I bit the bullet and did CC. The best thing i ever did. It only took 3 nights with the first night being the worst and each night getting progressively better. Aiden now even sleeps better during the day.

Cheryl
DS: Aiden James 03/08/04

Thankyou for the advice, i have tried CC in the past, and I haven't found it works with him, but I will try the soothing techiniques every now and then as well. As it is the weekend, it gives me a little bit of time to try it.

Can anyone advise me on the closest clinic to Deakin, I haven't attened a clinic with DS since we moved down.

Thanks again... oh and if anyone else has more advice.... I would love to hear it.

I just want to say that I know how you feel. My little man has been getting up 3 times a night since he broke his leg. For us; control crying doesn't work as he just gets out of bed and then comes in to our room. It seems to be getting better; he only gets up between 10pm and 1am and then comes in again at 5am but it is still taking its toll on Ollie and myself.

I really hope it gets better for you soon.

Thanks

Rohan & Harley 1 Oct 02

My baby has his cast off

Rohan,

My children used to make night-times painful until I put a mattress on the floor next to my bed and told them to put themselves to bed there if they need to. Now if they need to, they just bring themselves and their doona into my bedroom and tuck themselves in. I often hear them and give them a little pat to let them know I'm there, but I don't mind being woken up if I don't have to get out of bed or do anything about it!

Sometimes one of them will try to come in before dh and I are asleep (not very often), and I'll ask them to wait until later - and they're really great about it now.

I still think I need to try cc with Jessica until she's big enough to bring herself into our room and tuck herself in - I just feel terrible about doing it. Obviously I'm not sleep deprived enough yet!



Kristen

Was going to write a long post but instead I'll just recommend "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley.

Edited to add: Not sure where the nearest clinic is to you but I know there is one in Woden and perhaps one in Griffith? Call the Community Health intake line 6207 9977 and ask them for location and when the drop-in times are.

You might also like to drop in to QEII in Curtin and ask whether they have day programs or you can self-refer for "sleep school". They mainly use CCing but I have heard one or two new staff members are also offering more gentle settling techniques.

Steph
DD Alex (March 04)


This message was edited by s_m on Friday, 3 June 2005 @ 7:56 PM

My immediate thought was whether it's due to the cold? Like someone who posted above, we've got column heaters in DS and DD's rooms for this reason - DD particularly as she won't sleep with covers over her.