I have a 2yo who is a second child and he is very shy. This is probably worse when his older sibling isnt around.
He still has seperation issues when leaving at kindy( after 1 year) but is great during the day.
He apparently needs coaxing to join in group activities and seems to be more of a solo kid.
I had some advice to try and get him to some more group activities. So today we go to reading time at the library- and he screamed and hot me etc. He would not sit down with me even when I made it clear to him that he could sit on my lap.

Do we keep trying or does anyone have any other hints or ideas how to encourage children like this>

Hi, one of my twins (4.4yrs) is quite shy. Until about 6mths ago we were actually very worried about how she would cope being so painfully shy.

She wouldn't even play with her twin sister at daycare and instead would either stay close to the daycare teacher or play on her own.

We tried to gently encourge her but if she still didn't want to do something then we didn't push her. Then about 6mths ago she started to really come out of her shell.

Now, she is most definately NOT shy at all. She does sometimes take a while to warm up to people though.

With the library both my twins still sit really close to me and hold my hands. They wont sit down by themselves. But we have to sit right at the back and not be right in the middle of everyone. Have you tried sitting right at the back? Or is there a chair nearby that you could sit on and sort of listen which might give him the impression he isn't sitting there with them?

I wouldn't worry too much at his age though.

Personally, I didn't like playgroups so we didn't do them. But that might be an option. Or just the park or playcentre etc where he will get exposed to other children. My girls happily run around with other children now even if they have just met them. Actually they don't meet them, they have no idea who they are.

Then when my girls were just over 3yrs old I put them into Kindy Gym which they love. It probably took them about a year to actually answer their gym teacher though. They did what he asked but wouldn't answer him and instead would just look down at the floor.

Thanks for that reply. Wow- I have another few years of all of this ahead... !

I tried that with the sitting away from the group as well- but ne already had an inkling that we would listen to the story !

I like your ideas of at the park and playing with other kids, so I will try and do this much more. We probably do this once a week. Today I also phoned kindy gym , a music class etc to see what their timetables were like. So, we will maybe do one of these if the time is right- however, I am thinking that he will be one of the kids who stand in the corner looking longingly at all the other kids having fun.

My heart just falls for shy kids as I want them to just experience everything with the fun and zeal and not have to worry.

my DD is extremely shy shes a bit older though shes coming up to 6yrs old. I find providing her with social activities helps but if i push her to become involved she shuts down and refuses to have anything to do with anything, she has to aproach it in her own time and if she sits back and watches for a while thats fine, what does help is my DS his 3yrs 8mths his a very social boy and helps bring DD out of her shell

DD1 was like this. Even at 3 she would not join in groups at CC or speak up on a group. I just kept on doing what we normally did. I didnt push her, but I did not keep her from situations where she was shy. She has outgrown it now. At the end of last year (3yrs10mths) she participated in a group dance recital, on stage at a mojor theatre in front of nearly 700 people!! I could not have been more proud of her just for getting up there.