[joshuakalan]

Save the $500! Maybe she is getting a kick back.

Birth is painful - very painful. Ask for pain relief before it is needed and gently remind her it is your pregnancy and birth.

[Penguin78]

Save the $500! Maybe she is getting a kick back.

Birth is painful - very painful. Ask for pain relief before it is needed and gently remind her it is your pregnancy and birth.

An extremely unhelpful remark.

Birth was not 'painful - very painful' for me. Whether that was because of the Calmbirth or whether i was just lucky, i don't know. But as others have said Calmbirth is more then just 'reducing pain' but about knowledge of your body and how it works, and teaches you how to work with it, not against it.

Also, asking for pain relief before it is needed can slow down labour considerably for some women. So its worth trying to work through the contractions for as long as you can.

Everyone else on this thread gave there responses as being true for them and what worked, and gave encouraging advice and yet you come in and give your response as if it the truth for everyone. Stop your fear mongering and move on.

[Tesseract]

CalmBirth was the best $500 I have ever spent. I had incredibly painful SPD, a long posterior labour without the cushioning of waters, a baby who wouldn't turn and a two hour pushing stage. Because of CalmBirth I avoided an induction, epidural and what I believe could very easily have been an emergency c-section. Because of CalmBirth the whole thing was fantastic and empowering!

It was painful, but painful like when you are doing a really intense pump class and you would do anything to get out of there - so not that bad lol. Definitely mind over matter works.

[4joys]

Hi OP,

Another recommendation for either calm birth / HypnoBirth.

I did HypnoBirthing and our birth story is linked in my sig if you would like to read it. I won't go into details, but for me it was amazing. One of the best things for me with the hypnobirthing was the fear release session, as I had some stuff that I needed to process from my other 3 births. I remember the pain of those like it was yesterday, but I honestly have to say that I felt next to no pain with the 4th. Pressure, and some intensity, but no pain. I also agree with PP that it was great for my DH. He is a total convert and birth junkie now

All the best.

[Miso_Missieys]

I didn't do any courses or read any books, didn't even know these existed before my first baby. However I knew going into it I wanted to avoid all pain relief.
I certainly had what I would describe as an in-body experience. Where as I completely blocked everything out, almost like I was unconcious. At the time I remember my husband putting a flannel on my head and giving me sips of water, I remember sitting on the toilet at some point and the midwife saying I was crowning, however I don't remember any of the pain, or anything else that was said around me. I was aware people were in the room but had no feeling of them or them getting in the way. It was the best first experience I could have asked for for a first baby.
Needless to say I needed no pain relief as I don't remember much of the actual labour, once baby came out, I was completely all there and remember everything from that moment. It's amazing what your body is capable of.
In saying this I was so praying for this for my second baby, however he was posterior and I sucked the life out of the gas.
You just have to go with what feels right for you.
I also had the best midwife ever for my first baby and she allowed me to be completely in control of my body and let everything just happen. Unfortunely for my second they had me straight up on the hospital bed, worst thing ever. Highly recommend avoiding the bed at all times,let gravity work its magic.

[mpjp]

I did the course and really enjoyed it. It helped me see birth differently and also made me feel empowered and less anxious. I loved see the calmbirth videos. My partner was sceptical but held his tongue.

Sadly I never got to use the techniques for birth. My son was born in great emergency at 32 weeks by c-section. But I was able to use the techniques to stop myself from shaking - I had gone into shock - so they could prep me (catheter etc) as they couldnt wait for the anaethetist. So in that sense I got my monies worth.

But the main positive I still see is that it made me feel positive and I wass looking forward to the birth!

[mpjp]

I did the course and really enjoyed it. It helped me see birth differently and also made me feel empowered and less anxious. I loved see the calmbirth videos. My partner was sceptical but held his tongue.

Sadly I never got to use the techniques for birth. My son was born in great emergency at 32 weeks by c-section. But I was able to use the techniques to stop myself from shaking - I had gone into shock - so they could prep me (catheter etc) as they couldnt wait for the anaethetist. So in that sense I got my monies worth.

But the main positive I still see is that it made me feel positive and I wass looking forward to the birth!

[CallMeProtart]

I did a hypnobirthing course and of course my instructor was the same re the "pain is due to fear" and "if you do it properly, there's no pain" and frankly I found it to be a friggin' crock of sh*t.

Birth hurts, in most cases. It really does. That's not a myth created by culture, men, negativity, or fear, it just f*cking hurts unless you are one of the very lucky ones for whom it doesn't. But to send the average person in with that expectation is frankly, deceptive, and what I really found offensive about the whole thing was the implication that, if birth DID turn out to hurt for you, you had done it wrong, or you hadn't 'relaxed' hard enough, etc etc. It's a load of self deceiving codswallop.

Now onto the positive side
There is some evidence, I believe, that fear CAN increase pain, and prolong birth. So getting rid of as much of it as you can IS an excellent idea, in order to have the smoothest and most painless birth possible FOR YOU. Everybody's body is different, and different levels of pain/duration will apply to everybody, but doing what you can is a great idea. And interventions and drugs (apart from gas) DO tend to lead to complications, so it's worth giving them a go.
Relaxation/meditation can be a good way of relaxing, eliminating fear, and getting into that 'zone' that a lot of women talk about having helped them during birth. Not so much a zone of no pain, but a zone of being in touch with your body and one with it, and getting through, rather than feeling scared, out of control, etc. It can be a wonderful experience, even WITH pain.
And the hypnobirthing can be a nice birth focused form of meditation to practise with. Did the book you got come with a CD? Use that. Use it regularly, so that you become able to enter that relaxed state easily - because it will be harder while contracting. The principles can be useful, even if there's a lot of bullsh*t, there's no reason to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

I shelled out for the course, and I'd have been better off just reading the book and practising to the cd that came with it. The plus side of the course was that, until that point, nobody had really put birth to me as a positive, joyful experience not to be feared but looked forward to as a challenge. And that point of view was so valuable. The videos of the orgasmic births and water births etc were heartening, in the calmness of them.
But by the end of the course, I was really exhausted by the propaganda, bullsh*t, and just lack of basic science. I remember her carrying on about that whole "fear creates pain - no fear no pain" thing and believing it till I walked out of the class... and then it suddenly striking me - "hang on - I don't fear my periods - but they still bloody hurt!"

I think if you read the book, practise REGULARLY to the cd (or to ANY relaxation cd, but it's nice that that one is birth focused) - and possibly get another couple of cd's off the net somewhere - plus look up a few positive birth videos on youtube - you can get the benefits of the hypnobirthing principles without spending $500!

[CallMeProtart]

Save the $500! Maybe she is getting a kick back.

Birth is painful - very painful. Ask for pain relief before it is needed and gently remind her it is your pregnancy and birth.

Why would you ask for pain relief before you needed it?

OP only just read your update - sorry a bit behind - good luck with it all!

[FeeBee10]

Are you doing the Calm Birth course in Brisbane at the start of August? I've booked in hoping it will help with a VBAC in October.