[terracottapots]

I lost my FIL earlier this year and we organised his funeral within a week. He suffered for a few years in his illness, and, while, we were not super-close, I loved him and thought that organising a really nice farewell was the best we could do seeing there was just so much sadness surrounding his illness.
It took us a week to prepare and the funeral was really lovely

Just recently I learnt that my'friend's MIL had passed away - her husband's mother. While they didn't live nearby her, they would often visit her once or twice a year . They were on good speaking grounds with her but decided NOT to go to her funeral. I struggled to understand this and when I asked her why, She replied that there was tension within the family(siblings NOT talking to each other) and then went on to say that they could not afford to travel to the funeral(didn't have the airfare money. She also went on to say that they didn't have enough time to get everything organised to travel and felt like the other siblings had made the funeral arrangement date at an inappropriate date.
The MIL's partner was NOT also coming to her funeral because he had some problems with the sibling. Four of the grandchildren from two families were not going either.
I thought it was just so sad. I told my friend that it was just so sad to hear, and while, I didn't understand, I would respect her decision.

I learnt that the funeral was very impersonanl - no personal eulogies, (just the celebrant reading the eulogy) - no slideshow - nothing..just photos on her coffin.

Later I got to thinking, would you do this? Would YOU NOT go to one of your parent's funerals?
Isn't it about them rather then YOU?

I saw my FIL's funeral as a celebration of HIS life and it was for everyone to get something out of.
His family came away with all the memories and wonderful reminders of his life...

This post has been edited by terracottapots: 19/04/2012, 06:17 PM

[lafonda]

If my father was to die now I doubt I would attend. I don't have the money in the bank for return airfares.


Edited cos I messed it up

This post has been edited by lafonda: 19/04/2012, 06:37 PM