[qak]

the reason is that DP is greek orthodox and we are going to a maco orthodox church(i had another topic about this a few weeks ago)

Because of what happened 100,000s ofyears ago between the two countries that is why they arnt coming, even though Dps dad says that all orthodox are the same,they wont understand what is being said.

but in the end its our choice on what we do, DP said if whoever isnt going to come to church is not coming to the reception, but im not sure i want to go through with that.

OK I know there is a whole lot to the Greece/Macedonia conflict, I have no opinion on it. I think if that's an issue to them then they shouldn't go to the reception either.
BTW I have been to weddings where I haven't understood anything either, I don't think that's a good reason to pike out. Even if you are not religious at all you can go to support the family.

[Dabri]

No I wouldn't at all, a church is a religious place and some people would feel uncomfortable there. The fact that they are coming to the reception tells me they care for your family.

Everyone is free to make their own choices and it would be rude to pressure people into going to a church and disrespectful to the church itself if they only went to keep the peace.

This.

After seeing the reason, I have sympathy to their view. In fact, I think it would be a tough ask to have them attend and participate in a ceremony that is against their own religious beliefs (worse even I think than if they were atheist with no belief system), where they would not know what was being said.

I can understand them wanting to be there in support but going to a church and participating in the prayers etc that are not only of an opposing church but in an unknown language would be confronting.

I think if you listened to their concerns and didn't try to steamroll them with "but it happened 100,000s of years ago" (which has to be a major exaggeration) and "they're all the same really" then they may feel that they have other options than to miss out entirely.

[YandiGirl]

Ahhh.....the Greek/Maco problem. I understand this one well.

This is certainly not something that can be relegated to thousands of years ago. It is actually a problem that is current.

Now, help me understand. Your partner is Greek? You are...?

[4kidlets]

I dont think I would be offended.

PP's who are saying decline the invitation altogether rather than just go to the church - I can imagine some people would be more offended if their family member refused to go altogether.

I dont think a christening is on the same level as a wedding either.

And people are free to decline any invitation for reasons of their own - the invitee to whom a soccer match was more important - I guess that is her perogative as much as any other reason - to people for whom christenings are not relevant, I can see that being the case.


I do think not RSVP-ing is rude, however I would probably follow it up with a phone call anyway.

[Katie_bella]

I'm an athiest, but have attended my neice and nephew's christening, sat in the church and taken the pics. I figure it's part of being a family. I did however (graciously) refuse to be a god parent as i don't think it's an appropriate roll for an athiest. I'm an awesome aunty tho .
I don't know much about the greek/macedonian thing, so can't give my opinion, sorry.
I suppose, what you do depends on how close a family member it involves and whether you feel it's worth the confrontation.

[BadCat]

The church thing wouldn't offend me. The lack of RSVP would bug me though.

[SlinkyMalinki]

Yes, I'd be offended, and I'm an athiest.

I've attended church weddings and baptisms regardless, because the people having them were close friends/family, and spending the time with them for their important event outweighs my feelings about church.

Not RSVPing is definitely rude. I'm not much of a phoner, so I'd probably text those you did not hear from.

[ninaswalk]

Yep I'd be upset. If they don't want to celebrate the religious part of it, then why come at all. Even the celebration afterwards is the celebration of a religious event - it's a bit hipocritical to go to one but no the other I think.

[ScrumptiousHobbi...]

Yes - this happened to me. SIL thought her DS's soccer was more important.

To her it probably was. Your child is your child. Her son plays sport, and her son is her priority.

OP just because they don't want to be at the church does not mean they do not love and want to be in your childs life. Let them go to the reception and celebrate the occasion there.

[Fluster]

Then as myself and PPs have stated, don't just turn up for the party - politely decline the invitation.

I'd rather read a book than attend a social gathering, even one I was fully in support of. Attending the reception shows that you care about the family/wish to catch up/etc. It's not about 'free food'. Somewhat unbelieavably, at the age of 31, I can actually afford to feed myself and am not in such dire need of a free mini quiche that I would attend a reception just for the food