[Sal78]

i don't keep b'day cards so one is fine if u really must. even ds1 wrote a card for his bro and sis's b'day and just gave them one card.all our family members only give 1 card. I never really gave much thought abt it. It's only a card.

Maybe when they are older, have separate b'day parties with their own friends then 2 cards is expected.

This year I specifically requested no presents yet they still got a mountain full!

star1234 - I agree with you. It's not even something I would give any thought to. No one gave the twins a separate card each a few weeks back and they're very close family and friends. I didn't even think of it. I don't even do b'day cards for my kids. I'm so glad that ds is old enough now to write b'day cards for people. Maybe it's a cultural thing but cards is not a big deal. It's also weird to think that just because they got a joint card that the giver does not treat them as an individual? it's a bit judgemental.

What about b'days where you get one big card and get everyone to sign it....I love it...can read all the messages on one page.

cards are only handy when i am giving a gift card or money so I can put it in the envelope.

my sil has twins and she gave a joint card to mine and i'm pretty sure we gave a joint card to hers...i know she throws the cards away lol

This post has been edited by Sal78: 16/04/2012, 12:14 AM

[~benita~]

For what it's worth I have spoken to 3 irl mums who have twins about this, all of them have scoffed at the idea that two cards are required. Sal 78 has put it much more eloquently that I could be bothered to on m iPad!

What about for the birth... Are two cards needed still? It just seems insane. My friends have even said that they enjoy joint presents ( like board games, DVD's, books etc) rather than lots and lots of "stuff" cluttering the house! I stand by what I said though, I find EB to be very precious, but particularly some of the twin Mum's. Highlighted by the post above where one has gone off on a little sideline rant.

[Sal78]

My friends have even said that they enjoy joint presents ( like board games, DVD's, books etc) rather than lots and lots of "stuff" cluttering the house!

that's true... but even for singletons, ds1's fav present was a wii game that 2 or 3 mums pooled together to buy...fantastic idea instead of 3 diff presents, better to get 1 that he loves and is nice and small and gets used a lot. We invited the whole class and we still have lots of presents still in boxes. I always try to find out what the child likes/wants/needs from the mum and if I get an ambiguous answer then I just buy gift cards, or movie vouchers/toysrus vouchers.

[~benita~]

My children are 6 years apart and their favourite present for xmas was a joint gift from Santa - a sackful of different sports balls. I honestly fail to see the difference either.

I know I am flogging the proverbial dead horse in here, but I just cannot understand how the opinion on EB is unanimously one way and with the three mothers I know totally the other.

[Mariamsmum]

Frosted: I think you are taking the card situation literally. Again I quote:

Frosted, it's not really about the card. It's about what the card represents. It's about recognising that twins are individual children having a birthday that just happens on to occur on the same day.

If you are going to give a card, give two cards to each twin. If you don't give a card, then don't. If you get a gift, get two gifts (can be the same value in total as one gift, but it allows each child to open their own present). If you are not buying a gift, then don't.

I don't think it is being precious or having unrealistic expectations.

And about enjoying shared present, sure, shared presents are great if they happen sporadically, and are a present that can be used by two or more children (such as games, outdoor toys etc). But if you get a shared present every single year for your birthday, then I'm sure that your kids would start to get annoyed or upset.

I'm actually shocked that there is so much opposition to treating twins as two separate children

Edit to add missing word.

This post has been edited by Mariamsmum: 16/04/2012, 08:45 AM

[Libster]

My children are 6 years apart and their favourite present for xmas was a joint gift from Santa - a sackful of different sports balls. I honestly fail to see the difference either.

I know I am flogging the proverbial dead horse in here, but I just cannot understand how the opinion on EB is unanimously one way and with the three mothers I know totally the other.

Your kids are possibly less likely to be struggling to assert their individual identities? And perhaps your friends might just be being polite or wait for it, have a different opinion to the people on EB?

[Duracell-Mum]

This may not be a popular response but I can't help but smile at the indignation of parents of twins at the thought of one birthday card shared between twins. I don't have twins but my children had several sets of twins as friends when they were at the 'birthday party' age. I always bought two presents and two cards when it was a twin birthday but noticed that when twins were invited to my children's birthdays there was only one present and one card given from both...

[twinmumplus1]

This may not be a popular response but I can't help but smile at the indignation of parents of twins at the thought of one birthday card shared between twins. I don't have twins but my children had several sets of twins as friends when they were at the 'birthday party' age. I always bought two presents and two cards when it was a twin birthday but noticed that when twins were invited to my children's birthdays there was only one present and one card given from both...

You know, I'll often give one card, even when given with other friends. I can't see why that is bad. As a group of friends, we often chuck in $15 - 20 each, and get one present from 4 or 5 of us now the kids are older. We use the one card - its the one gift from a heap of children?

As for the one present, well I do that as well. However, I spend what I would for two presents if I do that. Again, most friends appreciate that

This birthday recently, my sons got a share teeshirt. Tell me you would do that to two siblings years apart!

This post has been edited by twinmumplus1: 16/04/2012, 09:13 AM

[Swahili]

Two kids, two cards. Simple.

[~benita~]

Miriamsmum - a card represents nothing to a 2,3,4,5,6,7 etc year old. It tells them who the present is from. It represents something for YOU. And it is not your birthday!

I would not turn up to a school friends twin party (although this is one of the Mums I spoke to) with a shared present, but for extremely good friends, who I know would rather a $100 wii game for her twins then two sh*tty $50 barbies, or more lego or the like... but when I have the school twins adorable Country Road Bathers in two different colours I did write one card. It is not being kept, only the mother cares who gave what.

A very good friend of mine who is a twin mum is scared of their birthday... 2 weeks after christmas and she is stuck with a million and one gifts to put away. She said she would be thankful for no wrapping, no card. Bad for the environment and more to squeeze into the recycling!

I just cannot believe that the OP has been slammed for suggesting it. It is EB in general though - opinions sway wildly in one direction or the other.

Duracell-Mum - you make an excellent point. There is only one present and card coming in the other direction!