[Gonewiththewind:...]

Some background...

Baby 1: Difficult pregnancy until around 20 weeks (very very VERY sick!). Easy pregnancy after this. Newborn-9 months, very unsettled, severe reflux that wasn't well controlled until then, not a good sleeper. Now at 15 months a very easy baby (still not sleeping through but otherwise very very easy).

Thinking about TTC towards the end of the year. Minimum age gap we'd consider would be around 2yrs 3momths. Initially I thought closer to 3yrs but now I'm beginning to think being pregnant/young baby with an older toddler that still has a day nap would be better (obviously with a 3yr old there would be no day nap once the bub comes and potentially no nap through my pregnancy).

What have your experiences been with a 2.3yr vs up to 3yr age gap? Obviously we can't pick exactly but we fell pregnant very easily with DS so there is a chance we could have some say.

[tibs]

Well I'm sorry to say my 2 years and 2 months old no longer has day sleeps

I have 2 years 5 months between #1 and #2 and this worked well for me as my #1 could entertain himself to some extent plus help himself to snacks etc if I was feeding the baby. He went to preschool at 3 for 2 days a week so I then had some time with the baby while she was still a baby and just starting to really do things. Now they are 2 and 4 and get on so well they keep each other entertained and the gap isn't too big so they are interested in many of the same things e.g both still play duplo as my oldest isn't old enough to have moved on to lego which may happen with a bigger age gap.

We wanted a similar gap with #3 and I was due to have a 2 year 3 month gap but miscarried. Got pregnant again expecting a 2 year 5 month gap and miscarried at 10 weeks, had to have a D&C which meant no TTC for a further 6 weeks. Pregnant again now and should have a 2 year 8 month gap if things go well this time which is longer than we wanted but unfortunately beyond our control.

Good luck

[Libertine]

My Dd is 3 years, 3 months and still has a 2 hour nap every afternoon. I'm due with no.2 in October so she will be a couple of months short of 4 then.

Tbh I always wanted a close age gap but having seen pretty much all my friends have a second baby when the first was between 1-2 I am glad we didn't do it. If the first child is too young it is really hard on them and i am not sure would have coped all that well. It took us 2 years ttc for no.2 and I am now beginning to think it may have turned out for the best (for us obviously. Everyone is different!)

I reckon my dd will be at the age where she understands, and can help out. She will also start kindy at 4 so she will be gaining some independance and I will also have some time alone with the new baby too which will be great.

I wouldn't over think it op. TTC is a funny thing, it rarely works out exactly as planned but age gaps tend to work whatever you get!

[No girls here]

I wouldn't pick it based on whether or not your DS still has day sleeps. My boys both gave up their day sleep at 2, my sister's boys gave theirs up at 4. So either way DS may or may not be sleeping.

Personally I would choose the 2 year age gap. With 3 years it takes a while longer until they play together well, but they're not really old enough to be all that useful either.

[ubermum]

Unfortunately, you don't really get a say. I wanted 3 close together. I fell pregnant with my second when my first was 8 months. Since then ttc the third hasn't happened and then when it did I miscarried. My third will be 4.5 years younger than my second.

All children and families are different. It is hard to say which age gap is the best because so much is reliant on individual personalities and circumstances.

[Spartacus]

Three year olds are pretty sucky. I would go for a larger gap, so that the older one is 3 1/2 or older when the younger one is born so they're not tantrumming and being awful with a crawler around the house.

[Julie3Girls]

I wouldn't be timing based on day time naps. Simply because you cannot guarantee how long your child is going to nap. My older 2 girls both dropped regular naps at around age 2, gone completely by 2.5yrs.

That said, it is possible to get your child into the habit of "quiet time". We used to do it after lunch. Put on a DVD, and just have quiet time.

My age gaps with the girls are 2yr 6mths, and then 2yr 9mths. Love the age gaps. They are close enough in age to play together really well, get on really well. Old enough to understand about being gentle with the baby, and to entertain themselves a little bit.

During pregnancy with DD2, DD1 and I would cuddle together on the lounge, lying down, with a movie on. Half the time, I'd dose off, she'd occasionally sleep as well.

If you wait until the slightly older end, closer to 3, you might be able to put your oldest in preschool, and get one or two days a week with just the baby, where you can catch up on a bit of rest when the baby sleeps.

[Xiola]

DS1 was 2 and 4 months when DS2 was born. He was still napping for at least 2 hours but this stopped after a couple of months. It didn't really make much difference really. I can say though that I wish DD was closer in age to them (they're 4.5 and 7 now and DD is nearly 8 months old). All the running around with school runs etc I find quite hectic with a baby in tow and it was very draining whilst I was pregnant.

[bokbok]

Hmmm don't think as well just because your DS was easy to conceive that the second one will be too...our DD was conceived second month off the pill we were trying and yet we are going on for 4yrs TTC#2 and have just done our first round of IVF.

I hope it is not the case for you but just trying to say don't assume anything in TTC!!

Good luck - I would just start TTC whenever you are ready and whatever is meant to be, is meant to be and you will work around it!

[jess1980]

My 2 daughters are 2yrs 3m apart and my eldest had stopped her daytime nap around two. I think it's a fine age gap but I do recommend getting onto the toilet training before your next baby is born as I didn't and changing 2 lots of nappies was a pain in the bum! My girls are quite close and play well together.