[Kwyjibo]

DD1 is in Y1 and today came home with wet trousers as she had wet herself in class. At first she told me she had been splashed by the water fountain but the smell of urine led me to believe otherwise. She told me that the teacher had told her to wait until recess. She couldn't hold it in.

I'm going to speak with the teacher on monday but was wondering if anyone knows what the actual policies are when it comes to toilet breaks. I would have presumed that if a young child needs to go then they would have been allowed to go.

[=Magpie=]

I will be watching this with interest as we are having the same issues but with 'number two's'.
Personally I think they are too young (DS is in Gr2) to be expected to wait.

[kidwrangler]

Most children, most of the time can wait. The problem for teachers is that some children, some of the time use toilet breaks as a means to avoid class time, while others have a physiologically urgent need and small window of time. It's often hard to tell the difference. It also seems to happen that one child leaves, takes a friend, then another child needs to go and so on. It is very hard in a class of 25(ish) children to co-ordinate the toilet breaks. No teacher is going to deliberately leave a child to soil themselves.

If your child has toileting issues, just send in a note. If it was a one-off, ask the teacher what their class rule is and how your child can be clear that they genuinely need to go. Let the teacher know what happened and I am sure they'll be a lot more aware the next time.

I am sorry this happened to your DD. I hope it was a genuine misunderstanding between her and the teacher and doesn't ever happen again. Usually by year 1 they would be limiting their class-time toilet breaks, but also the teachers at that age level are usually aware of the urgency involved when a request is made. Does she often ask? Is she a last-minute type of toiletter? I think a bit of a chat with your DD about her needs, and then a chat with the teacher, should be able to sort things out so it doesn't happen again.

[fairyflossfart]

In DD's class if one child wants to go to the class the teacher will ask the others who needs to go. Then pick a child of the same sex.
They are pretty good with letting kids use the toilet.

[challice]

My child is in year 1 and they can only go to the toilet at recess and lunch. They don't seem to have any problems because I think they started to get the kids used to the idea in kindee.

[~Supernova~]

The policy at DD's school is break time only. This has caused no end of stress for us as DD suffers from chronic constipation, and when she has to go, she HAS TO GO. We had problems in prep and grade 1 with her sometimes soiling herself and I was livid when told she hadn't been allowed to go to the toilet. Her prep teacher refused to listen to me, but thankfully her grade 1 and 2 teachers were fantastic when I explained the situation. She is the only one in her class who is allowed to go at absolutely any time, which I find wrong, but it's the policy.

I know that teachers are trying to minimise disruption to teaching time, but little kids often just cannot hold on, and I think they deserve the same respect as adults have - they go to the toilet as, and when they need to.

[fairyflossfart]

As adults we have the freedom to go to the toilet 'when we need to go'.
So why should the kids be made to wait?

[mum850]

I agree with the PPs, the reason it's an issue is that sometimes every kid in the class then wants to go too so the teacher makes a blanket rule. The trick is telling an "I want to get out of class" from a genuine "I am busting".

[Goggie]

I'm so sorry for your DD. This happened to me in prep and I have never forgotten it. We could only go at recess and lunch and in between those I asked the teacher to go and she said no. I was a young prep so was still 4 at the time. I was embarrassed, my brother laughed at me when I got in the car that afternoon with the smell of number 2's and it's one of my worst memories of primary school. My mum went into school the next day and ripped shreds off the teacher and principal. From then on they had new rules where you could go anytime but take someone with you.

[howdo]

As adults we have the freedom to go to the toilet 'when we need to go'.
So why should the kids be made to wait?

Not all adults.

When I worked in hospitality I had to wait for breaks or a suitable break in customer flow. In my current job I can only go on breaks. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I cannot go from 9:20am until 1:00pm. There are places where no, you cannot just go as you please.

School is one of these places. kidwrangler gives spot on advice.