[Rumply]

Thank you all for your response!

I have ordered a bunch of books from the library to help us learn how to help him.

He has actually taken to the big bed really well. I think after the initial shock he has come to understand that is his bed and ended up sleeping the WHOLE NIGHT THROUGH last night !! He doesn't really even do that in the cot.

He did have a rage attack once we got home for care, so we distracted him and slowly he calmed down. I think once he starts learning that he can rage all he likes but we aren't going to give in (like with the bed) he might lessen the frequency.

I will have to look closer for triggiers. And really keep an eye on the start of any escalation and maybe I can avoid some of this.

Again, thank you so much!! It is reassuring to hear that others are experiencing this and they have come out the other side.

[lozoodle]

My DD was a little bit older when she went through this, but boy did she have some terrible tantrums.

It was just after her second birthday, and I had a newborn at the same time too so for a while I was convinced it was because I'd had a new baby.

I was so upset by it, and I was almost scared of my first DD, I didn't want to be alone with her as the tantrums were just so full on. Thankfully it passed very quickly!

What helped was giving plenty of choices. The tantrums come from frustration and having a lack of control. So the more control you give them, the better. It can be simple things like "do you want the red top or the blue top today" but it didn't matter how simple, it made her happy to have some control.

Shortly after this her speech improved massively and she was talking in full sentences. This really made all the difference in the world - once she could communicate properly, the frustration was gone.

We still have whinging and tantrums sometimes of course, but nothing like those horrible ones.

It passes!

[neaka]

I could write this post word for word....

This is exactly what we are experiencing with DS who is 22months old.

Our problem is he DOES bite other kids and also hits. I am finding myself not wanting to be around him and am trying to work more and get away more often because i feel like i just cant handle him. Ive also been worried that it is an indicator of what his personality is developing into and i dont like it! I am 33 weeks PG so im sure that doesnt help. My patience these days are very thin!

I will be reading this thread with great interest and i really hope you find some strategies that help.

Thanks and good luck

[Rumply]

Just got the first couple of books from the library.... Will keep you posted!

[Lokum]

This is our DS, 22 months as well.

He also throws big heavy toys in frustration. Or trashes the play area.

I find warning him and explaining to him what's about to happen helps. Eg, if he's playing with toys, and I go and pick him up to change his obviously stinky nappy, he'll chuck a razz and scratch or hit my face. If I go over, explain we're going to change his nappy, tell him he has to come with me, help him to stand up and lead him by the hand, it usually goes better (not always.)

We also insist 'no hitting,' and he cuddles us for sorry as well. We practice gentle touching and cuddles when he's calm, so if we think a hit or scratch might be coming, we say, 'Gentle touching, gentle touching,' and may be able to head him off.

We're also trying to practice 'gentle playing with toys,' to minimise the throwing of the toys in frustration.
We HAVE to take him out, a LOT. He needs to run and roam and be physical as much as possible (not strapped into a stroller.)

His language isn't great, heaps of single words, and very few 2-word combos. Sometimes when he goes 'ah ah ah ah' I say, "stop, shhh, tell Mummy what you want,' and he tries, and I try to listen. Being listened to and focused on seems to calm him.

It's tough, and often very embarrassing in public , but I figure it's actually more difficult being him at this stage.

Good luck.

[libbylu]

Ahhh, the terrible twos
He is getting to the verbal stage. Try to encourage him to use his words, or help him verbalise what is wrong when you see him getting frustrated....
I remember doing lots of verbalising at that age like:
"oh dear, the lid won't come off? What can we do? Try the other way? No? Mummy help?" Try to talk him through it and help him to a) say what is wrong b) think of ways to solve the problem c) ask for help.
Then as he gets a bit older you can say "use your words!", which always helps.
Good luck.

[creepersgonnacre...]

Normal