[suzy-c]

Yes, I had a bad feeling.
Around 16 weeks, when I had just heard the heartbeat at the antenatal clinic a few days prior, I was just overcome with dread. I was crying in bed and inconsolable. I tried to explain to my partner that I just didn't know if bubby was ok, but I didn't want to tell him that I felt he wasn't. Eventually I wrote it off as sheer paranoia and endeavoured to be more optimistic. Still, the feeling never left me.

4 weeks later, at the 20 week scan, he was measuring at 16 weeks, and had died. I had convinced myself that I had felt kicking in the last couple of weeks, which put my mind at ease, but I couldn't've. I was induced the next day.

Reason for edit: Edited by mariamsmum to remove signature

[Gixxie]

my first baby i had a miscarriage at 8 weeks, and ended up in hospital with a burst ovarian cyst.

The day before I ended up in hosptial, i felt sick like i had food posioning, but also had the feeling of weightlessness or leaving my own body. That is when i think my baby died. Doctors couldnt find baby in ultra sound and thought i was eptopic, but when i went into surgey they found i had a massive mass on my right ovary that had burst, even though i was postive with preg hormone they dont know what happened to bub.

My 2nd pregnancy Anita was born at 21 weeks, due to prom which occured at 20weeks. The day before my waters broke again i had the sick feeling that i had food posioning and just didnt feel right.

[Tanglebirdie]

I found out my daughter had passed away at the 40 + 4 appointment. Since i moved ot where i live currently which was around 25 weeks My sister and I have been having 'strange' feelings. Eeerie things were happening around my house and twice i swear blind that I saw a man standing in my house wearing a trench and a top hat. 3 weeks prior to my daughters passing I had dreams about my late grandfather who was calling me on the phone asking if i was ok. I woke up hysterically crying and my sister who was in Fiji at the time called home to see if my baby was ok. At 4am the morning of the 40 + 4 appointment i woke up and was thinking about my hubbys father who passed when he was just 10months old. I said to him in a little whisper 'i dont know whats happened, but please look after my daughter, keep her safe". then a few hours later at 1pm i found out she had passed. Now shes been gone for about 9 weeks, the fan in her nursery keeps turning on and ive taken video footage of my puppy plaing in my loungeroom at night and i see little white balls of light hovering around and flying across the screen. I think its her letting me know shes around.

[follies]

My mother said she just knew, and had to convince the doctors to check.

[rattie]

Ladies I'm so sorry for your losses.

Its not my intention to trivialise the loss of a baby in later pregnancy (stillbirth) by talking about my early losses. But I do I think I was incredibly "lucky" to have had my losses early. I think losing a baby at the end of a pregnancy or during labour would be too much to bear.

For both my miscarriages I felt a strange cold sensation across my abdomen, ice cold. The first loss I knew something wasnt right, but I convinced myself I was just being paranoid. Then I saw a spot and knew it was all over but held some hope, until a scan confirmed my fears.

My second loss I felt the same sensation again. I just knew my baby had died. I was quite upset and couldn't convince my husband that I'd lost another one.

I discribed it to a friend as almost like someone passing their hand over my tummy, taking my babies away and saying "this isnt for you".

This post has been edited by rattie: 30/05/2012, 10:10 AM

[in(s)ane]

Yes, I KNEW there was something wrong with DD. We already knew about one cardiac condition from 13 - 22 weeks. I was really happy for a couple of weeks but then become convinced something was terribly wrong.

I made my OB check for heartbeats every couple of days and finally booked a private morphology scan to have everything rechecked at 29 weeks. All the markers appeared fine, I still wasn't convinced.

At 30 weeks the cardiologist discovered a second cardiac defect. The combination of defects meant DD chance of survival was minuscule.

[wallofdodo]

I have twice. One with an early loss, I was really optimistic about the pregnancy, I had decided to do things differently from the previous pregnancy (also a loss, but don't really want to go in to it, lets just say I never felt right about that pregnancy), so I had decided to buy something for the baby, before 12 weeks.

I knew exactly what I wanted to buy. So I marched into the shop picked up the item, hesitated and put it back, then walked out. Had the scan two weeks later, and fetus was two weeks behind, without a heart beat.

I am truly sorry for eveyone's loss. Heartbreaking stuff.

[corenmh-ma24]

I woke up one morning suddenly, with a start, at about 6 weeks pregnant. The first thought that was in my head was "Something is wrong". Would love to know what was happening/what I was dreaming about just before I woke up. Carried this thought pretty much through the whole pregnancy.

Went to the toilet, expecting blood. There wasn't any.

Went to every antenatal appointment throughout the pregnancy holding my breath until I heard the heartbeat.

Decided 2 days before Jacob was born that I was wrong, he was fine and he was meant to be here.

The morning after Jacob was born, it became obvious he wasn't well. Immediately the feeling came back and I knew he was going to die.

At 5.30pm, despite the doctors doing everything they could to keep him alive, Jacob suffered a heart attack, went into cardiac arrest and was unable to be resuscitated.

He died from an undiagnosed but should have been diagnosed, severe heart defect.

[Lausii]

I am so sorry for all your losses.

I had an ectopic pregnancy in 2004. I just knew from the moment I found out I pregnant something
wasn't right. I even told DH not to get excited as this pregnancy wasn't going to continue. It was my first and only loss and still think of that baby daily. I was around ten weeks.

Its not my intention to trivialise the loss of a baby in later pregnancy (stillbirth) by talking about my early losses. But I do I think I was incredibly "lucky" to have had my losses early. I think losing a baby at the end of a pregnancy or during labour would be too much to bear.

Well said. And totally agree.

[fairymagic]

Wow - you women are amazingly brave sharing your experiences on here. I have not experienced either a miscarriage nor a stillbirth (thankfully) but work as a midwife. Reading your stories on here has literally sent shivers down my spine as you describe the moments where you feel something is not right or the lightness or floating experience and believing that is when your precious babies passed.

Im sorry any of you had to go through the experience of losing your precious babies and thank you for sharing your experiences on here.