[Nicole-Bris]

We are having alot of trouble with our DD who will be 7 in May. It is a very long story which involves quite a few professionals and an appointment booked with a developmental paed at the end of the month. The last couple of days DD has been saying that she wishes she was dead (mainly when she is getting into trouble because of her behaviour). I'm just wondering if this is "normal" behaviour or another thing that we need to look at.

Thanks

[MARsmum]

My 6 year old DD1 said this a few weeks ago. It really scared me and I had a talk to her explaining how it worried me that she had said that and maybe she needed to go and see someone to talk about these feelings. She threw a massive tantrum about going to see someone (she has had a few surgeries and views Dr visits as potential surgery) and it was left at that. If she said it again I was going to seek further help. I too am unsure if it is normal behaviour or not.

On a side note, my DD1 suffers from a severe gluten intolerance. She is gluten free although I recently discovered that she was being exposed to gluten through cross contamination. Since changing this and not exposing her to the gluten she says that she feels a lot happier and is not sad all the time .

[hannahsmummy]

hi

just thought i would pop in and send a hug to you and your dd... my dd said the same thing when she was that age... but she was being bullied at school...

it is the scariest thing when your child says something like that.. just give them the hugs and love that you can and find out if there is anything else going on

tanya

[HURRY UP]

My DD (7yrs) has said this many times and it makes me want to cry BUT after speaking to the child and youth helpline I do feel better. They pointed out that she probably doesn't really understand exactly what she is saying, DD was also hurting herself by slapping her legs or on one occasion hitting her head on the wall (not very hard). It was suggest by a social worker that its like a 2 year old having a tantrum and she needs to learn how to express herself. For example when she says she wishes she was dead ( same as your DD usually after she'd got in trouble for something), to say something like " I know you are sad/angry because....." use words to explain her feelings and even when she is smiling about something to say " you look happy".
I also spoke to DDs teacher about it because I thought some of it may be related to her friends, last year she was upset because she didn't have a "BFF", she has many friends but not 1 extra special one! She does seem a bit happier this year but she still says she hates school.

I feel for you, it does break your heart to think your child is unhappy.

DD was 7 in January and hasn't said it for some time so hopefully she won't again.

Take care
K

[tothebeach]

DS (7) says this - but he really doesn't mean it. He is usually in the midst of a tantrum and is striking out.

[Stoked]

I said this often as a child but it was always in the context of '...and then you will be sorry for treating me like that'. So, basically, tantrums because I wasn't getting my way.

[miinii]

OH OP how horrible for you! My DD will be 7 next month and has never said that. She has said that she never wants to die (we have had a couple of deaths in the family over the past couple of years)

Sending you

[cat5245]

I was chatting to a friend a few weeks ago who said her daughter was miserable and saying similar things about wanting to die and also hitting her head against the wall repeatedly. She has had great success with the Elimination Diet and found that things like salicylates and amines were really affecting her child's behaviour and mental health. Her daughter is completely different now. Its a bit scary how much different preservatives, chemicals and even intolerances to natural foods can affect our children's behaviour. It might be worth looking into.

[abcangel123]

When DD was 6 she did, and she knew the meaning of it. We're in the process of seeing whether she's has depression. Which is most probably.
I think it's normal for kids to say this out of anger like pp said. But if they actually mean it, i'd be concerned.

[madmother]

My oldest did, and even climbed up onto a high fence at school wanting to jump off.

For him, it was to do with sensory meltdown, emotional overload and a scream for help.

All part of being on the autism spectrum, sadly.

We took it very seriously.