[poss71]

I witnessed a car crash online the other day. Unfortunately, in this instance, the analogy is all too accurate. Thread [link to locked thread removed so as not to breach forum guidelines] ; blood was drawn, there was at least one distraught 'victim' I am aware of.

I offered support to a fellow EB member: PM'd her; reported to the mods; even posted a carefully worded message supporting her in the thread.

This is where I feel I failed; I should have let rip on those posters who were behaving atrociously towards this member. Acted to redirect or dilute their attack. Instead, I kept my head down so I wouldn't cop the same crap she was receiving. Yay me.

So here goes. My Youse Are A Mob post. I probably won't flounce, just letting you know.

My questions: Do threads such as these ever make you feel sick to your stomach? Do you ever stop to consider the audience when posting a reply? Is that audience the person you are quoting? Or is it the wider audience, who might also get a laugh out of this hilariously witty response?

Perhaps empathy should be practised here on EB a little more. Sure, someone might have posted something stupid. And you've had a bad day. You need to let it out; safely, online, where nobody gets hurt - well, nobody you know, anyway.

Now imagine that it's the nice lady three doors down who says, 'oh, I don't think x is as big a problem as they say.' You disagree. Animatedly. Then, one by one, eight or ten or 15 other people with the same opinion as you turn up and say the same thing to this woman, one after the other. Don't let her talk for her own part; or, if you do, point out that her voice is somewhat nasal when she speaks, her breath is a little on the whiffy side, 'and - just to help you out, dear - did you know that we can see your undies through that skirt?'

(Nothing personal, of course.)

How is she going to react?

Will she cry? Storm off in a huff? Try to argue with you that you misinterpreted her?

Or will she stand there, head high, shoulders back, dignity intact and say, 'your opinions don't really matter to me. It's not like I know you IRL.'

What do you think?

This post has been edited by poss71: 06/01/2012, 12:46 AM

[Guest_maybelle_*]

If we are thinking about the same poster in that thread, she will spend the rest of the day sending me angry, agressive, abusive PMs.

[Owl_Little_Girls]

Not sure what you are hoping to achieve with your post OP, but it is the WWW... what do people expect?

If we are thinking about the same poster in that thread, she will spend the rest of the day sending me angry, agressive, abusive PMs.

Why maybelle? Because you had an opinion different to hers? What did you do?

[poss71]

The poster I am referring to has deleted her membership in some considerable distress.

Whether she was the one who sent you 'angry, aggressive, sbusive' PMs, I can't say.

What I can say is, unwarranted attacks on her were and remain on the public record. Whatever PMs you received are Private messages.

Do you think you acted appropriately and fairly, maybelle? If so, then this thread shouldn't affect you at all.

[poss71]

Not sure what you are hoping to achieve with your post OP, but it is the WWW... what do people expect?

Perhaps some level of recognition that even on the WWW... people are people. A quiet voice in the back of one's head that says, hmm how would I receive this?

[Owl_Little_Girls]

On whole - Who gives a rats what a bunch of strangers say online. If it affects you so, indeed delete your membership and seek advice/friendship or what ever it maybe you are looking for IRL.

Not everyone is going to agree with everyone, it's a part of life.

Why have you made it personal to you OP?

[ChickenortheEgg?]

She posted in the 'What Do You Think?' section. She asked & she received.

[Owl_Little_Girls]

Perhaps some level of recognition that even on the WWW... people are people. A quiet voice in the back of one's head that says, hmm how would I receive this?

I agree - People are people. But online, posters don't have to care how it's going to be received. They answer questions, state their opinions and the like. Sad fact, emotions also can't be read online.

She posted in the 'What Do You Think?' section. She asked & she received.

Yeh, what she said. And much better then my long winded post!

[la di dah]

Reading that cluster**** of a thread late, I'm not even sure who the dogpiled person is, is it the OP or one of the others who picked up the baton and ran with it.

Skimming, I saw a calvacade of astonishing statements.

In a serious car crash, were the analogy apt, someone would be maimed or killed. I'm not even sure who the "victim" here is. A lot of people got ruffled, is that THAT big a deal?

[Flibbertigibbert...]

I agree with you OP, the mob mentality runs thick and fast around here. A differing opinion is likely to see you shot down in flames, called names and attacked for the slightest imperfection.
I don't have an issue with people disagreeing, but the villification that goes on around here under the guise that because it's online it doesn't matter is pretty poor form.
Chickenor the egg, she asked for opinions on the email not to be drawn and quartered. A simple I don't agree for xyz reasons is enough.