[soontobegran]

My 3yo currently chooses her clothes (as if I could stop her!), takes out and brings in the bins, checks the letterbox, tidies up and vacuums the floor, helps hang out the washing, and puts her clean washing away.

I am a fan of letting her do it

She helps hang out the washing at 3?
Low clothes line or extremely tall child?

[Gangnam Style]

Maybe she hands the clothes to her mum or dad to hang? Maybe they use a clothes horse for drying?

[soontobegran]

I find this thread hilarious and I am going to get flamed to hell and back but children are children--not mini adults.

Sure our kids had chores, cleaned their rooms, took care of their own hygiene, did their homework independently, played independently, did whatever around the house that I asked if I needed but they also went to school 7 hours a day, worked part time jobs, studied for hours so that they did well at school and managed to play sport to keep fit and have a healthy social life-----all far more important than focusing on housework.
If housework isn't high on the list of what is important to the parents--why should it be for the children?

Despite the fact I made their lunches right through school, drove them to work and sport, washed and took their clothes to their rooms and only expected them to do age appropriate chores they managed to learn how to 'look after the home' by osmosis. They are independent and competent adults.

[Gloriosa]

I find this thread hilarious and I am going to get flamed to hell and back but children are children--not mini adults.

Sure our kids had chores, cleaned their rooms, took care of their own hygiene, did their homework independently, played independently, did whatever around the house that I asked if I needed but they also went to school 7 hours a day, worked part time jobs, studied for hours so that they did well at school and managed to play sport to keep fit and have a healthy social life-----all far more important than focusing on housework.
If housework isn't high on the list of what is important to the parents--why should it be for the children?

Despite the fact I made their lunches right through school, drove them to work and sport, washed and took their clothes to their rooms and only expected them to do age appropriate chores they managed to learn how to 'look after the home' by osmosis. They are independent and competent adults.

My house is exactly like the op's and the reason they do all that is because they are part of a household and I'm nobody's slave. Part of being in a household (to me) is helping with the running of a household.

I believe that you do children a disservice by doing things for them that they can do for themselves. To me it's not about making them self sufficient adults (because obviously your children are proof that they can be) but the fact that I have no interest in walking around picking up after them if they can do it themselves. If everybody chips in then the parent's workload is decreased. No harm in that and i don't really see what's hilarious about that. I was put to work around my house as a child (obviously age appropriate) and it's done me good.

[Aribika]

I'm loving this thread. I am also a parent who thinks that one of my most important jobs is to teach my children how to look after themselves. This doesn't mean I don't feed.clean or wash for them but it does mean that I encourage them to do things for themselves when they can.
A common saying in our house is that you "Do what needs to be done." This means if something needs to be done and you have a spare hand you do it. I think it adds to a child's confidence.

Lorraine

[soontobegran]

My house is exactly like the op's and the reason they do all that is because they are part of a household and I'm nobody's slave. Part of being in a household (to me) is helping with the running of a household.

I believe that you do children a disservice by doing things for them that they can do for themselves. To me it's not about making them self sufficient adults (because obviously your children are proof that they can be) but the fact that I have no interest in walking around picking up after them if they can do it themselves

I didn't say that they didn't pick up after themselves and I certainly wasn't their slave.
We did work as a family----I just didn't expect them to do more than I thought was age appropriate nor did I expect them to substitute what they needed to do as high school students with a heavy work load with work around the house that I was HAPPY to do.!

That is what I found hilarious-----I don't have a problem doing my own 'chores' around the house.

[OurCompletedFami...]

Sunny I very much agree with you - as that is our household - however I make lunches otherwise the two DSDs would just eat very unhealthy food all the time!...
I do however have problems here and there when they 'help' the family by doing chores/ housework (feed the dog, stack/unstack dishwasher, their own clothe washing/hanging out/ putting away (another story as to why), and vacuum their own room).... I battle only because they dont have to lift a finger when they're at their mums (not kidding - have always had this battle)...

However I also like what soontobegran said.... as I would like to think that they are kids, well teens anyway and that they shouldn't have to do chores/ housework all the time, I mean its not like the have homework more than two nights a week anyway.... but if DH is working from dawn to dusk, and I too am working part-time and have two toddlers to look after, where would I find the time to do everything for everyone? That is why DSDs have to help, and get their pocket money.... our two toddlers also help with various household chores...

Gloriosa you said my words perfectly

[soontobegran]

I don't see an issue in getting a child to help out if it's made fun and done in a companionable way alongside a parent. Setting aside a small amount of their own clothes that they can hang out themselves. Learning what is involved in living is important. I am sure there are some teenagers who move out of home who don't know how to work a washing machine and think that a dryer is the only way to dry clothes and the only reason they have to even think about it is because they live too far away to be able to take it all back home to Mum.

I think that I need to edit that post of mine----It wasn't that the child was helping, it was that I had the vision of my tiny 3 year olds trying to help hang out our clothes as I have trouble reaching our line (it doesn't go up or down)

Our kids had a toy clothes line that my dad made them, they used to wash their dolls clothes and hang them out as I did ours.

[RachelG]

My five year old DD made her own vegemite on toast this morning because she wanted to. My children entertain themselves and very rarely say they are bored, they get their own snacks and drinks and put their washing away. They put dirty clothes in the washing machine and keep their rooms tidy. I actually think it is a sign of respect to me and to themselves that they look after their belongings etc. My 8 year old DS cooks Pork San Choy Bau and it is delicious. I think some people do their children a disservice by not allowing them to achieve tasks on their own. The sense of pride and achievement they get is amazing!



This post has been edited by RachelG: 03/07/2011, 08:52 PM

[Gloriosa]

I didn't say that they didn't pick up after themselves and I certainly wasn't their slave.
We did work as a family----I just didn't expect them to do more than I thought was age appropriate nor did I expect them to substitute what they needed to do as high school students with a heavy work load with work around the house that I was HAPPY to do.!

That is what I found hilarious-----I don't have a problem doing my own 'chores' around the house.

I haven't seen anything in this thread that isn't age appropriate that makes it so hilarious. I think I'm a bit lost.