[diary~dad]

Sexy Mumma!!
By Joseph Kelly

Very shortly after Susie and I had announced that we were expecting Maisie, our first child, I came home one day to find that my mate Dan had left a copy of Peter Carey's novel The Tax Inspector on my door step with a note that simply said 'Read this book and tell me what you think. Dan'. Intrigued, I tucked the book under my arm and headed inside to find a comfy reading spot.

A few weeks later I called Dan and arranged to meet him at the pub. Straight away he wanted to know what I thought of the book.
"Yeah it was OK. The end was a bit weird" I said.
"No, no. Forget about the ending. What did you think of the woman in it? The tax inspector?" The tax inspector in the title of the book was a Greek Australian woman called Maria Takis who, we are told, is very beautiful and has recently separated from her partner. She is also eight months pregnant. "Didn't you think she was incredibly sexy? I think pregnant women are the sexiest women in the world - and you're going to be living with one!"

To be honest, up until this point I'd never thought of pregnant women on any sort of scale of "sexiness". To me, pregnant women were sort of like mini-vans: transportational units for conveying children. And the only pregnant women I had ever observed were strangers on public transport who always looked hot and uncomfortable. And, just so we're clear, I don't have a fetish for hot and uncomfortable women.

But Dan had one thing right - I was living with a pregnant woman who, as it happens, was changing both physically and emotionally from week to week. The physical changes themselves of bigger breasts and a bigger tummy were novel, but not immediately what I would call "sexy". In fact I had to overcome the sense that holding this newly shaped Susie was a bit weird because she felt nothing like the woman I had married. Deep in the recesses of my mind it felt like I was cheating on my wife - with my wife!!

The emotional changes were a different story. Susie has for each of her three pregnancies been mercifully free of morning sickness. Instead, with each pregnancy she has been enveloped in a very warm and comforting bubble of pregnancy induced contentment. It's as if the more life started to grow inside her, the more life radiated through her. Call it the pregnancy "glow", but it seemed as though Susie had tapped into the essence of life and was keeping it as her own secret. And that was sexy.

We have now had three children and, at the risk of outing myself as some kind of weirdo, I've loved all the changes pregnancy has brought to our relationship. When we were discussing number three, one of the things I look forward to the most was that pregnancy time when everything seems to slow down and Susie and I have a very strong and shared focus on a new baby. And even with a couple of kids in the house we seem to find more time than usual to be together. And what's not sexy about that??

Do you find pregnant women hot or not? Has pregnancy given your relationship spice or put it on ice?

This post has been edited by diary~dad: 13/11/2009, 01:25 PM

[cansei de ser se...]

Being pregnant definitely made me feel sexier. I'm not sure if it made me sexier, but if my partner didn't think so, he certainly did an excellent job of hiding it! I'd say that pregnancy definitely added spice. Unfortunately motherhood has iced that, but I'm hoping to get the spice back again as soon as the wee fellow starts sleeping through the night.

[TheEggman]

Pregnant women - not hot. A lot of pregnant women get that nice healthy glow, but that doesn't translate into being hot.

And both times my wife was pregnant she all but shut down her interest in sex.

Blokes are still into it, because hey, we're blokes. But for mine women look hotter when they're not up the duff, and the sex is also better.

[raven74]

Eggman, honestly is a virtue, but ... hmmmm.
Try having constant period type cramps non stop, extreme fatigue, agonizing breasts, a tummy that you cannot possible think can stretch anymore, the ligament pain - often sharp and stabbing - a body that is totally out of your control, a limited food selection, lower back pain that feel like you have been hit with a piece of 4 x2, insomnia, hormonal surges and the associated headaches, not to mention the nausea, sometimes non stop vomiting, and a husband who thinks you are no longer "sexy".
It's no wonder you didn't get laid much.

Do I feel "sexy" pregnant? Absolute no - for many of the above reasons. I have friends who look AMAZING. I see women in the street who I think look incredible considering what's going on inside! There are also some goddamn SEXY belly pics on this very site. Does my hubby find it "sexy"? Not really - but not because my body is changing - in fact, he LOVES my changing body, not just the boobs! He doesn't find it sexy because my "I really don't feel attractive" rants make him feel out of control of a situation he cannot "fix". Do I have friends who look a little worse for wear during pregnancy? Yep. What their body is doing is amazing and incredible, and I know their partners find the fact that the woman they love is "giving" them a child a hugely bonding and emotional experience. Not too many of them give two hoots about the sex. In fact, I hear a bot of bragging in that department In the words of a very good friend "Pregnant sex is amaaaaaaaaazing!"
Dh also couldn't care less if I had sex with him while pregnant - this time, he says, is about ME and nurturing the baby we created. If my cervix looks like minced meat and sex is painful - well, he's had a pair of hands for 42 years. He is quite happy to use them. AS am I

[Mum of 4]

Pregnant women represent everything that's special about being a female - of course they're sexy!

My husband finds me more sexier than ever when I'm pregnant. He says the softness and fullness adds appeal, but I also think there is a subconscious aspect for men that says 'this woman is fertile and able to bear children' that appeals to their cave man instincts to breed!

On an anatomical level for women, pregnancy means our genitals are often more engorged and benefitting from increased blood flow, which of course means easier arousal and greater sensitivity.

Sexiness is a state of mind and in between the nausea, heartburn and aches, taking time to marvel at how absolutely fabulous our bodies are is a great way of connecting with our bodies and in turn feeling sexier.

Getting back on the horse after having a baby is very important for the relationship. After having 4 children I cannot say enough for getting active, eating healthy food (in healthy portions) and getting back into your individual healthy weight range after bub is born (this doesn't mean 'working out' - it just means staying active around the house, going for walks and not being too sedentary). It gives energy and good self image, which is sexy to your man - but most importantly makes you feel good about yourself. Dads also need to take responsibility for post-pregnancy sex life by getting us in the mood by doing what turns women on most...being helpful, caring and loving!!

[TheEggman]

Eggman, honestly is a virtue, but ... hmmmm.
Try having constant period type cramps non stop, extreme fatigue, agonizing breasts, a tummy that you cannot possible think can stretch anymore, the ligament pain - often sharp and stabbing - a body that is totally out of your control, a limited food selection, lower back pain that feel like you have been hit with a piece of 4 x2, insomnia, hormonal surges and the associated headaches, not to mention the nausea, sometimes non stop vomiting, and a husband who thinks you are no longer "sexy".
It's no wonder you didn't get laid much.

Hey, I understand. Pregnancy doesn't look like a barrel of fun, and I'd fully appreciate why anyone pregnant wouldn't be into sex. I didn't expect a great deal of sex during that time

The question was though are pregnant women hot. I say no.

[twotofour]

I am with eggman on this one,especially a multiple pregnancy it's soooo not a good look lol

[6'n'out]

When I was starting to 'show' with our first baby I asked DH if some men found pregnant women attractive. I was ofcourse fishing for compliments. DH stated "sure, there are all sorts of freaks out there. Some people get off on squishing cockeroaches, so yeah, some must get off on pregnant women"

As you can imagine, I felt Oh so pretty

[Gabrielle-marie]

Totally hot! just look back to the little photo on the link to this piece! But granted, not all preggers girls look like that.

When I was pregnant I was so into my body and not just as an incubator for future joy of life child. Earth mother is not just about the mothering it is about the fecundity and that can be very sexy.

Partner and self were more deeply intimate during pregnancy than at any other time in our relationship. It was definitely hot.

[123Tanya]

not hot.

no no no.

Bring on the big, beige undies and let me sleep.


Just because your husband wants to have sex with you, does not mean you are hot. I agree with eggman.