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One twin invited to bday party and not the other, Update Post #49

Libster View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:44 PM Post #1
Posts: 1,077 Joined: 29-January 10
Advanced Member
My daughter has received an invitation for a birthday party for her friend at preschool however it only has her name on it, not her twin sister's. I suppose I shouldn't expect an invitation for both however they're only 4 and it breaks my heart to have to tell my other daughter that she can't go to the party. I'd think it would be fair enough if they were in different classes however my daughters and this friend are in the same class. Then I thought maybe the mother doesn't know that they are twins but both of my daughters names are on the same pocket outside the classroom... Would you ask the mother if your other twin could come along? There is another issue too, my husband won't be home the day of the party and I think my daughter is a bit young for me to do the "drop and run", so I'm not sure who can look after my other daughter. Aargh it's all too hard! ETA: The party is at their house and not a play centre or anything. This post has been edited by Libster: 05/03/2013, 11:40 AM

AvadaKedavra View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:51 PM Post #2
Posts: 4,117 Joined: 9-January 11
Advanced Member
I would ask. It may well be the case that the other parents don't know, even if both their names are on it. I'm sure anyone would understand.

her mum View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:51 PM Post #3
Posts: 691 Joined: 19-October 10
Regular Member
Every time someone comes on here suggesting it's not fair that their child isn't invited to a party they're shot down and told no one should expect an invite because not everybody needs to be friends with everybody else. Why do you imagine it should be any different for twins? I'd call this a good learning experience.

seayork2002 View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:52 PM Post #4
Posts: 1,929 Joined: 30-January 08
Advanced Member
SORRY I DID NOT SEE WHAT SECTION THIS WAS UNDER AS I LOOK AT NEW POSTS I can only give my view on what I would do in this situation if my son were a twin, first off I am finding all this party etiquette very tiring when I was a kid I received/gave invites and I went/didn’t go or people came to mine or not. I hold the same view towards my son’s (future) ones. He will be invited to some not others (and I am presuming if he was a son the same) we will invite some kids not others (I am not nor ever having an ‘invite the whole class’ parties) and as he takes everything in his stride I would be surprised if it bothered him BUT if it does I will just explain the situation at the time, it is up to me to speak to him if he is upset not the other parents. Mind you even though he is nearly 5 and a half I doubt he has any idea what a party is or whether he would like to go or not. He has been to one in his life and was not fussed. I could not even imagine him having the foggiest idea at 4 For the practicality side I would write a letter and explain you can’t go because you don’t have anyone to look after the other child. This post has been edited by seayork2002: 28/02/2013, 02:58 PM

boatiebabe View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:53 PM Post #5
Posts: 1,387 Joined: 11-August 09
Advanced Member
Strange they only invited one and not both? Particularly as they are only 4. I think I would probably decline the invite.

regandrog View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:53 PM Post #6
Posts: 654 Joined: 8-November 07
Regular Member
I would talk to mother. As you say she may not know they are twins, its also possible her DD might have thought inviting one twin was actually inviting the other twin too.

FluffyOscar View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:56 PM Post #7
Posts: 3,842 Joined: 15-March 09
The fembos go so overboard.
The first time one DD went to a party but not the other was hard, but they soon saw it eventually evened out. Is your DP not able to look after one child, assuming the party is on the weekend?

bebe12 View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:56 PM Post #8
Posts: 299 Joined: 3-December 11
Member
hi, When my DD changed schools it had two classes and she invite whole of her class. I didn't know that one of the girls was a twin (twin in other class). The mum rang when she was rsvping and mentioned it. I was grateful to her as i didn't know and didn't have an issue with one more child. Mention it to the mum, she really may not have realised that they are twins. May you could mention that you are willing to help out at the event if that would make it easier.

Libster View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 02:58 PM Post #9
Posts: 1,077 Joined: 29-January 10
Advanced Member
QUOTE (FluffyOscar @ 28/02/2013, 03:56 PM) The first time one DD went to a party but not the other was hard, but they soon saw it eventually evened out. Is your DP not able to look after one child, assuming the party is on the weekend? No, he'll be at the Future Music Festival all day... usually he's not busy on the weekends

facetious-beast View Member Profile	28/02/2013, 03:00 PM Post #10
Posts: 819 Joined: 4-October 07
Regular Member
QUOTE (seayork2002 @ 28/02/2013, 03:52 PM) For the practicality side I would write a letter and explain you can’t go because you don’t have anyone to look after the other child. This. Maybe she will get the hint. This post has been edited by facetious-beast: 28/02/2013, 03:02 PM

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