[Marquise]

So I've just had my first child, 3 weeks ago, and yes, I am buggered and exhausted. But I'm also an old mum (about to turn 40), and the experience of having my daughter (after being quite sure for most of my life that I wouldn't have kids) has made me realise how much I DON'T want her to be an only child.
Is it crazy for us to be considering another one straight away? It took me a year to fall pregnant, and I think it will be harder this time.
advice?

[frizzle]

Not at all. I would get the all clear from your dr and start when I was ready. At your age (which is only a year older than me by the way) I would seek help after ttc for 6 months. Don't try for a year.

This post has been edited by frizzle: 25/02/2013, 04:38 PM

[Marquise]

thanks.

bit worried that it might kill me - people seem to freak out at an 18 month gap, let alone something closer. Have you done it?

[.:Natty:.]

12month gap here, whilst not planned and it was a complete shock, it works. I didn't know any different and every baby stage just seemed like a long long stage. Its a scary thought but you cope, you have no other choice. I now have a 4yr gap between 1 &3 and honestly I still prefer the closer age gap.
Its hard work and you are tired but it is worth it

[Marquise]

how do you handle the feeding? are 2 arms enough? Do they sleep in tandem?

[mad madam mim]

I bumped into the woman I shared a room with after the birth of DS1 3 weeks after his first birthday, she was on her way home from hospital after having her second (so her children were 1 year 2 weeks apart), it was what worked for her and her family. If you want another and don't want to wait then go for it (obviously after getting the all clear from your Dr)

[.:Natty:.]

how do you handle the feeding? are 2 arms enough? Do they sleep in tandem?

Sometimes two arms aren't enough lol, but you get very good at juggling.

Sleep wise dd1 was a very good sleeper so she used to still have two day sleeps when dd2 was born. I had them on a very strict routine, I needed it more for me then them. Some nights you felt like you never got to bed, but I think its like that with bigger gaps as well (still feel like that often with the three especially when sickness comes visiting lol).

Feeding wise, you do feel like you are constantly dishing out food, my supply didn't last with dd2 (we moved 2 days after she was born so lots of stress) so she was bottle fed, so I never really had to factor tandem feeds ect, but I have heard others do it fine.

[oliboli]

I am an older mum too - had my first at 39 and second at 40 - 11 1/2 months between the two. It certainly wasn't planned that way but just happened, and I am so glad it did. Everyone told me it would be hard (especially my charming MIL who told me it was terrible that I was pregnant again and that I would not cope and would end up in a mental institution! - suffice to say our relationship has been extremely frosty ever since!). My kids are best friends and are playing together outside as we speak. I would have had a third with the same age difference, but it didn't happen for us unfortunately.

[House.of.blue]

My DH and his sister are 11 months apart in age.

My sister and I are 14 months apart in age.

My DD was born 4th Oct 2010, my DS was born 17th Oct 2011 and this baby will be 4th April 2013. My body has its moments where it hates me I swear but it's doable. Make sure you check with your OB/GP that there are no reasons not to TTC so soon.

[Marquise]

I think we'd have to keep trying for another one so soon a secret from PIL. They'd descend on us with criticism and worries.

It's the growing up together thing as friends I'd like. I love that your kids can do that. 11 months - is that too young to have been jealous when the 2nd child came along?