[Serenity Now]

My 3wk old DS generally has a couple of unsettled periods each day. He will occasionally settle in the sling or pram or swing, or if being walked around by DH (but not by me). The most successful way to settle him is to give him a finger to suck on - I would be more than happy for him to comfort suck on the breast but he is not interested. Breastfeeding seems to be well established, he is gaining weight well, and seems otherwise alert and content. DH is keen to give him a dummy but I am reluctant to go down that path as I have heard too many horror stories about needing to get up a thousand times a night to replace dummies, and difficulties with weaning off the dummy. I am aware of the effects on dentition and speech, and if we did try a dummy I would want to use it only for settling but I'm unsure how realistic that is.

Can you please share your experiences with dummies? Do the pros outweigh the cons? Any suggestions about how best to use them?

[Mumof32b!]

Hi just from my experiences:

DS1 not BF and used a dummy from about 3 weeks but only until he discovered his fingers.

DS2 not BF either he used one until I eventually weaned it off him at 2.5, after about 1 he only used it in the cot to sleep.

DS3 now 1 and exclusively BF, still feeding actually has used one since he was about 2 weeks old and still has one to go to sleep. For me with 2 older children to tend to I simply didnlt have the time to sit with him for hours on end so it was great for us. Now when he wakes up he leaves it with his favourite teddy in his cot and never asks or needs one outside that environment.

I say if you are happy BF is established then give it a try but resist temptation to make it the first thing you give him if he is only slightly unsettled if you know what I mean. You never know he might not actually take to one like my eldest.

Good luck, oh we used Happy Baby, cheap and cheerful in packs of 3 from Big W.

[elizabethany]

I introduced a dummy at 8 weeks, just so I could get my hand back. We used it for settling only, and took back the dummy if DS wasn't going to sleep. We got rid of it cold turkey at 20 months, but changed a couple of sleep routines at the same time (including moving to a single bed) and didn't have any problems.

In short, it worked really well for us, but we had to be strict on "dummies are for bedtime only".

[Tesseract]

You're going to get so many different answers to this question. None of them right or wrong, just different people's experiences.

For us DD wasn't interested in comfort sucking or cluster feeding until about 6 weeks. But when she did finally understand that the breast was her best source of comfort it was actually fantastic. She would cluster feed for a few hours during the unsettled period of the evening and this would keep her happy. It would also mean she got heaps the really fatty milk and would then sleep a good stretch! It was also fabulous for my supply. I would be concerned that with a dummy you might bypass this opportunity.

Anyway I did end up using a dummy from about 12 weeks (I was seeing a lactation consultant and she recommended holding off until then because they need to do a lot of sucking to fully bring your supply in). It was great, for about a month. Then it got to the point where she wouldn't be without it - in the car, in the pram, in the sling, I had dummies coming out of my ears! And I've also read that they're quite unhygenic. Then the 4 month sleep regression hit - the night I had to put her dummy back in her mouth 12 times I decided it had to go!

So going on my experience I won't be using a dummy for the next bub. I'm not knocking dummies (others will come in and say they're great) but they were a problem for us.

The other thing to remember is that many newborns have an unsettled time each day and that this is normal. Sucking on a finger also has the added comfort of the fact that it is flesh and attached to a caring adult - a dummy doesn't have this so you might find it not as effective while at the same time creating a problematic dependency.

[PurpleNess]

DS is 14 months & was a FF baby, he had his first dummy around 6 weeks after some pressure form my DH ( I was very anti dummy). It really helped him settle & I used it all the time in the car & cot.
Now his dummy stays in the cot ONLY , along with his comfort bear. He knows when he's getting up that he says bye bye to Dumby & Bear & leaves them in his cot till next sleep, no issues. It's up to you to control the use of the dummy & use how you see fit.

[Princess.cranky....]

Yes, yes! All 3 of mine have had them and we would never have survived without dummies! They did not cause any problems, no speech issues. A god send for a baby who loved to suck for comfort. Comfort sucking on the breast didn't work for us. Do it. Dummies are not that bad!

[Bluenomi]

It depends on the child. DD never liked them so while we tried a few times, she refused them so we gave up. Other parents credit what sanity they have left to dummies.

Give it a try and see what happens.

[soontobegran]

I don't recommend them being introduced to a baby who hasn't quite got the breast feeding sorted but at 3 weeks if you feel your baby is sucking well then I say go for it..no harm in trying.
I have had 3 with and 2 without, the 2 without had the worst dental/orthodontic issues because they sucked thumbs and fingers and did so long after the dummies were gone from the others.

Dummies are not the devil but I do think as the child gets older and more able to communicate with you then there need to be rules brought in as to how often and where they are used.

[mumma_ox]

We tried a dummy at about 3 weeks with our BF daughter. No problems until she decided it was a great toy to "talk" to when she was going to sleep from around 5 months. So we got rid of it entirely. It worked for us at the time - but I would certainly have preferred not to have to use one...

[~kacee~]

With DD we gave her one while still in hospital (didn't know otherwise at the time!) and she was very happy with it (breastfed until 14 months, so didn't interfere). She finally gave it up at 3 (bit of a battle, but at 3 you can reason with them!). We had "rules" with her that she only got it at sleep times, and she never asked for it other times. At around 5 through to 8 months her sleeping was terrible, and I do think the dummy (having to replace it) was a big cause (but not the only - also had supply issues) of that, but from 8 months she could pop one in herself (we'd put about 5 in her cot!), and was STTN consistently from 10 months.

With DS we tried so hard not to give him one, just so that we wouldn't go through the sleeping issues DD had. But, he was such a sucky baby, always wanting the boob or a finger. Finally, we decided there is no difference between a finger and a dummy, and gave in at around 4 -5 weeks. Best decision! He has never had any sleeping issues with it, has been sleeping through the night from 6 months, and it's great on occasions when they are tired and crying and need comfort (think car trips or out in public).

I think dummies can unfairly be given a bad rap, and I'm grateful DS takes one! I've heard of babies after 5 - 6 weeks not taking them, and parents wishing they'd given them one.

Oh, and we've always given cherry shaped ones.