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> Persons comments make me second guess myself

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citylife
post 16/02/2013, 07:08 AM
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I didn't know whether this was a vent or simply me just wanting to reassure myself.
A Mum at an activity my LO attends has a 2.5 yr old and asked if I had enrolled my child for 3 yr kinder next year. I simply said no that they are going the year after.

Now I have my own reasons for this they are:

My child's bday is late March
I want my child to turn 4 in 3 yr old kinder, 5 in 4 yr old kiner and start prep as a 5 yr old turning 6 not a 4 yr old turning 5

If I do send early it means we have to wait and miss out on 7 weeks or so of not attedning Kinder until turns 3

This mother who I only see once a week and pretty much just say hi to at the activity in passing then started giving me a lecture about how she thinks I should re consider and that since my child is so advanced that I am doing detriment to them by keeping them back. Mind you I have quite a chatterbox and the vocab is a lot more advacned than many the same age or in the case a little older like this mothers child who hardly speaks doesn't even say hello to you.

I have made enquiries and have had lengthy chats with many Kinder Teachers and they all say hold them back as it will be of benefit later on. Some have even changed the cut off dates here and you have to be 3 at the end of Jan rather than end of April so my child misses out on that anyway.

Why am I second guessing myself?
Have I made the right decision?
Yes I have my DH and I agree and that is all that matters

Anyone have a end of March/early April bubs and sent them early? Pros/cons
or held back Pros/cons

Thanks
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cinnabubble
post 16/02/2013, 07:15 AM
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I like cats, but I couldn't eat a whole one.
We don't do kinder, we do daycare, but my mid-March child will be starting school at four. Why? Because there's no reason for her not to. She's tall as some of the FYOS kids (and she's not yet three), she's very verbal, she's very socially adept, she has a big sister at school so she knows the ropes. I don't see the point in not doing it.
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SensibleSis
post 16/02/2013, 07:18 AM
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Perfectly fine to make your own decision!

We held our April DD back and we are so glad we did.

As the youngest of then 3 DD's we did not want her to be the youngest at home and at school.

We were less worried about the primary school years and more concerned with the social consequences of being potentially more than 12 months younger than a number of her peers in high school.

I'm sure you will get plenty of replies saying that you should not hold children back.

You know your child best.

EFS

This post has been edited by SensibleSis: 16/02/2013, 07:20 AM
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NotBitzerMaloney
post 16/02/2013, 07:23 AM
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Also don't do kinder, but rather daycare. My May DD will be starting school at 5, because she's going to a private school that has a cut off of April. Otherwise I would have waited till she was 3 to work out what she was like and whether she would be likely to be ready.

Her FYOS brother was barely ready and he's an August birthday, but his best friend is a March b'day and was totally ready.

Go by your child, not the somewhat arbitrary - and variable - school cut off dates.

(Our other consideration was ensuring DD is 18 for schoolies and Uni, presuming she goes to both!)
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FlowersForAlgern...
post 16/02/2013, 07:24 AM
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I think you need to keep in mind that if your child starts 3 year old kinder and turns 4,- and you find your child is still well advanced, or bored, or just plain ready for school - your child can start school as a 4 year old turning 5, without having had completed 2 years of Kindy!

So if, at this stage, you and your DH are comfortable to start your child in Kindy just before s/he turns 4, that's absolutely your decision. You've got at least a year before you need to determine whether your child is ready for school at 4-turning-5, or if you want to stick with the original plan of waiting.

FWIW my mid-March child started school as a 4 year old turning 5 and managed quite well.
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farfaraway
post 16/02/2013, 07:25 AM
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DD1 is an end of March baby and started primary school last year aged 4. She is certainly one of the youngest but it hasn't hurt her one bit.

I personally don't understand the drive to hold kids back, but I appreciate it is important for some people. At the end of the day it is your child - do what you think is best and ignore the opinions of others. They really count for nothing.
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katrina24
post 16/02/2013, 07:25 AM
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This is not one of those decisions that has a right or wrong answer. Many people make the choice to start the following year when their child only just makes the cut off and many early childhood teachers recommend this (as you have experienced). My youngest daughter did preschool last year (year before FYOS). There were 4 children that just made the cut off. At the end of the year the preschool teacher had recommended to parents that 3 out of the 4 repeat the preschool year and delay starting school. None of these kids had any developmental problems - the teacher just didn't feel they were ready (the parents told me this, not the teacher). For different reasons, only 1 of the three chose to repeat. All 3 parents are happy with their decisions.
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~~~
post 16/02/2013, 07:28 AM
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dot dot dot
QUOTE (citylife @ 16/02/2013, 08:08 AM) *
I have made enquiries and have had lengthy chats with many Kinder Teachers and they all say hold them back as it will be of benefit later on. Some have even changed the cut off dates here and you have to be 3 at the end of Jan rather than end of April so my child misses out on that anyway.

I have to say that none of the daycarers/teachers I spoke to have ever advocated holding back unless there are obvious delays etc, socially or otherwise.

QUOTE (SensibleSis @ 16/02/2013, 08:18 AM) *
As the youngest of then 3 DD's we did not want her to be the youngest at home and at school.

We were less worried about the primary school years and more concerned with the social consequences of being potentially more than 12 months younger than a number of her peers in high school.

huh.gif really? With all due respect, it would never occur to me to hold my child back just because they were the youngest at home.... someone has to be shrug.gif

Having put my 2c in, it is up to you and your DH to decide with the information you have. I don't agree with reasons such as "they won't be able to drink at schoolies"/yr 12 etc, but then its my right as a parent to make those decisions for my children, as it is your right for yours.
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Fossy
post 16/02/2013, 07:31 AM
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You and your husband know your child best, don't second guess yourself!!

Dd was born March 25, we are sending her to 3 year old kinder next year. She goes to daycare and is already in the preschool room so I'm not concerned about her not being challenged.

As you mentioned, the preschool she's going to doesn't accept children after Jan
31 so she couldn't go this year even if we wanted to send her. They said they had too many issues dealing with younger children who weren't ready so made a blanket rule. Works for us!
Our local preschool offers one morning a week but she couldn't start until term two if we sent her this year, I think she'd miss a lot in that first term, plus one morning a week seems like a waste of time.

Im happy with our decision, couldn't imagine sending dd this year.

Fwiw tell your friend you're not holding her back, you're sending her when required, kids need to start school by the time they turn 6, which your child will be.

This post has been edited by Fossy: 16/02/2013, 07:34 AM
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Freddie'sMum
post 16/02/2013, 07:34 AM
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I pick and arrange all my own flowers, Jerry!
Hi OP

As you would have realised by now - absolutely everybody decides to put their 2 cents worth in once you have kids.

We are in NSW - do didn't do the Kinder thing - both girls went to long daycare as I work part time.

Our eldest DD is a May baby - she could have started First Year of School - as either a 4-and-a-half year old OR a 5-and-a-half-year old. We "held her back" and started her at 5-and-a-half year old. It was the best decision for her.

Do what is best for your child. That is all that matters.

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