[MissingInAction]

Do you have a friend or family member who you no longer talk to?
Do you have a friend or family member who no longer talks to you?
What happened? What went wrong? How do you feel about it?





I have a relative who I was once very close to who went from being basically my BFF to not wanting anything to do with me at all literally over night. For the first few months I became almost obsessed with trying to find out what went wrong but it just hurt too much and wielded only petty "reasons" so eventually I moved on. It took over a year for me to get to a point where I could laugh it off when she actively avoided me at gatherings and realised it was her problem not mine. It still hurts to hear about her through mutual friends and relatives and know that I'm not a part of her life anymore...

[ubermum]

Yeah me.

I had a good friend that used to be a housemate. We then ended up living in seperate places but maintained a good friendship. She and her partner had 3 kids, my partner and I remained childless, but we still maintained a friendship. Then, her and her partner broke up and I supported her through that. Once on her feet, she started to make choices that I just couldn't support. I told her my reasons. She decided she still wanted to do the things she wanted to do so I wiped her. I couldn't be her friend and judge her decisions the way I did and I wasn't going to change my mind. I haven't had any contact with her in over 10 years. It doesn't bother me at all. She was turning into a different person to the one I started the friendship with.

[FiveAus]

I had a best friend, I met her when we were both in our late teens.....she was newly married, I was engaged to be married.

We became good friends fast, socialised together, had our babies together, became part of each others families as very close friends do.
When I moved interstate for a year, I missed her dreadfully and would ring her two or three times a week for a long chat.

When I was in my mid-30's, I suddenly felt things start to cool from her end. I have no idea why, but I remember ringing her one day as I'd just gotten a puppy and I wanted to show her kids......she said she'd bring them in the next few days and never showed up.
I dropped in on her one day, as I would normally do, and although I was offered coffee, I felt as though I'd got a very cool reception.


I tried a few more times over the next few weeks......cheery phone calls, invites to shopping or lunch.....and got the cold shoulder each time.

I left it for a few months, and tried again. Same thing. No explanation, I was just no longer part of her life.

More than anything, I was puzzled and confused and to this day (15 years later), I have no idea if I did something wrong, said something I shouldn't have. She wasn't a person to gossip, and she wasn't one to believe gossip, so I just don't know. And no one else knew either.

[Lucretia Borgia]

I don't talk to my dad, haven't for about 15 years. He's never met my two sons. It's a long story as to why, but essentially it's because of how he treated my mum, and his lies.

My sister keeps in touch with him. He is sick now, very sick. I don't know if I will attempt to build a bridge or not.

It's hard isnt it OP!

[Leha]

My brother. I haven't spoken to or seen him in over 3 years and couldn't care less. We used to be really close but he has turned into the nastiest piece of work. In fact my whole family no longer speaks to him. He hasn't even met my DS.

I'm pretty sure he has mental health problems but there is only so much ou can try and help someone.

[Sunny003]

Yep!
One, I stopped being a doormat. (Well actually there's been a few of those!) I've found that I'm drawn to a certain personality & once I stop being a doormat, they dot like it LOL

Another we still talk, just aren't close. Again, I stopped being a doormat, stopped doing all the calling/visiting & I realised it was pretty much one sided.

The other is family/inlaws. It took a long long time but I'm fine without now. I feel for the kids involved though:(

I worked out that life is easier without the drama. When people are quick to point their finger at others and to put people down, I don't want to be around them, & that's ok.

[aleithaki]

I stopped speaking to someone who continually bad-mouthed my husband in front of me and our other friends.

[libbylu]

This has never happened to me in my 36 years.
I have plenty of friends that I have drifted away from (but am mostly friends with them on facebook!) but none that I have had a falling out with or that had a sudden ending. Any little tiffs I have had with girlfriends over the years have been sorted out quickly.
And even most of those that I have drifted away from I would love to catch up with if I had time....but so many people, so little time!

[naturalgoodness]

My mother. Approx 4 years ago after a disagreement she sent me an email telling me that my brother and I were dead to her and followed it up by sending me a box containing all photos of both of us from birth to present day (including all photos of grandchildren).

She had seen my DD2 one time at a few months old and never since, and will not know our baby due next month.

[Soprano-Cat]

I don't talk to either of my sisters during the year, but that's more a mutual recognition of absolutely nothing in common other than genetics.

and when I visit for christmas, they're too busy bonding with each other to notice me, so I still don't really talk to them.