[Chookamazzo]

Ill start by thanking everyone for sharing their stories, whether happy or sad. We all draw a little bit of strength in knowing that we are not alone. My sincerest love and thoughts go to all who have had to bear the loss of a child, it is the most harrowing thought ever. I wanted to share my story, partly because I think it helps me cope and partly because I guess I hope someone writes back and tells me they went through the same thing and now have a healthy two year old that just plastered Vegemite all over the crisp clean folded nappies. I am 15 weeks 5 days, I think I have started to miscarry. It started with some blood and tissue yesterday morning, called my OB to see if she thought I should go to the hospital. She said yes, but that all they could do really was to check for a heart beat. 5 hrs of waiting later, thank goodness we have a heartbeat, it takes your breath away. I explain to the doctor our Difficult pregnancyDiagnosis 1:2 trisomy 18 pending an amniocentesis as well as low HcG and possible low PAPP-A. He tells me there is nothing they can do and to come back to emergency if we do miscarry and the bleeding becomes too much for us to bear. It's a feeling of absolute numbness, empty, like having your heart ripped out. Without my best friend by my side (hubby) i'd say I'd be basket case. He is staying positive, but every time I go to the toilet there is more blood, more tissue, its not heavy but it's becoming more red than brown, cramping is really minimal, so maybe it's not a miscarriage? I feel like maybe im giving up too soon, I should be more positive! i just want to know if this precious life was meant to be? Life is so fragile. Thank you for listening.

[orangepeanut]

Im so sorry you are going through this. But all is not lost, you could be experiencing normal pregnancy bleeding.
It aint over yet, although it must be gut wrenching, try to stay positive and please keep us updated

[rubylilysmum]

Please don't give up yet, there is a chance your baby is ok.

My neighbor had a massive bleed earlier this week at 16 weeks and was hospitalized for 4 days and baby is fine
I understand your fears well thou since i lost my last baby 8 months ago at 15 weeks.

Rest as mush as possible and hope everything works out well with your pregnancy

[Missy Shelby]

OP I am so sorry that you are going through this.

As I have said before on EB, limbo is a horrible place to be and in some ways I am sure you just really want to know either way.

I have read loads and loads of encouraging stories on EB where ladies have had big bleeds, bad cramping etc and have gone onto have a healthy and happy bub at the end of it.

If I were you I would be, lets say, cautiously optimistic.

All the very best OP, I hope everything works out for you xo

[L&Bs_mumma]

To the original poster I just want to give you a great big hug. I just want to share my experience with you. My little angel boy was due June 2012 but we found out from our 12 week nucal we had 1:2 down syndrome and 1:2 Edwards syndrome. At 15 weeks our little boy decided tout was easier to live out the rest of his years with his nana (my mum) as an angel. While this isn't the happy ending you were hoping for I would like to say I do now have a healthy and happy (sometimes!) 8 week old little girl. Our little Christmas miracle. Big hugs my sweet and I hope your doing ok whatever the outcome has been.

[Chookamazzo]

Thank you all so much for your love and support. After reading your posts i found a new hope, i couldnt give up, this bubba still had a strong heartbeat, there was no giving up. tuesday morning my bleeding & cramping got worse so we headed to emergency again, 6 hrs later i got admitted as the OB thinks it is too unsafe to go home to wait and see at 15 wks. Wednesday morning we finally get an ultrasound, that little heart is still going strong, but the cervix is opening, the unimaginable is inevitable. It has been the toughest week and a half of my life and I expect it will remain that way for a while. Our most perfect little boy was chosen by the angels yesterday. As much as I crave for him to be in my arms again I know his 4 grandaddies are keeping him safe.
Thank you so much ladies for your positive encouragement, it really gave me a lot of strength in a time of hopelessness. We know that our little darling Antonio Arthur Robert will know he was loved and will always be loved.
Congratulations L&B's mumma on your Christmas miracle I can only imagine the feeling when you got to hold her for the first time. I look forward to the time we can feel that too. I know it will happen for us one day.
Thanks again x Brooke

[littleboysmum]

So sorry to hear of the loss if your darling son Antonio. My thoughts are with you.

[rubylilysmum]

Brooke I am so sorry your precious Antonio couldn't stay here with you.

Please take care of yourself over the next few weeks and feel free to PM me is you want to chat

[~kacee~]

I'm sorry for your loss

[sakura73]

I am so sorry. What a lovely name your son has. My DS is Arthur, he is 18 months, and he has an older angel sibling lost at 13 weeks. Take the time you need to grieve. But know too that though you will never forget Antonio, the day will come when you are holding his brother or sister in your arms.
Sending you love and prayers.