[FrogIsAFrogIsAFr...]

Scene: Younger kid's party; all the girls (party invitees) were outside partying and the boys (siblings & older friends) were inside watching Youtube on the TV.

My son was inside.

Enter: a mum coming inside to chat to another mum in the loungeroom.

She stands in front of the TV and my son says "Excuse me, could you please move out from the TV".

The mum turns to him and says "oh, excuse me, I forgot kids were now adults and could speak condescendingly".

My son came out to ask me what 'condescending' meant and recounted the story. He 'assures' me he didn't speak rudely and I wonder today;

a) is it socially permissible for an 11 year old to ask an adult to move if they use their manners?
b) should my son have said nothing and waited for the mums to stop talking in front of the TV?
c) was it right for the mum to call my son condescending?

I truly can't answer these questions! I do wonder if DS was rude (he has never, ever been hauled up for being disrespectful to adults in his life), but in our home, it's OK for a child to ask somebody (anybody) to move if they just come and stand in front of them (of course, if they use manners!).

WDYT? Maybe I'm out of touch and raising tomorrow's spolied brat and don't know it yet!

[~sydblue~]

If your son spoke exactly as you said, I would be more than happy to move. He used excuse me and please.
I probably would have done a dance in front of the tv first and said why though. But I do that to DD's all the time.

So no, I don't think he was being rude.

[Tooties]

Agree, sounds like what he said was fine. She was also rude for just walking up and standing in the way like that.

Also agree with dancing in front of the tv before you move, gotta make the most of being in their way.

[Goggie]

If your son spoke exactly as you said, I would be more than happy to move. He used excuse me and please.
I probably would have done a dance in front of the tv first and said why though. But I do that to DD's all the time.

So no, I don't think he was being rude.

Yep this. I don't think that's rude at all

[Cacti]

No, I don't think he was rude.

[TopsyTurvy]

Not rude IMO.

But then again I wasn't there and tone can convey a lot, so I would just forget it and move on

[Sweet like a lem...]

Yes to the first, no to the second and no to third - not in that situation and given environment.

[*Finn*]

Not rude at all, in fact I would have said sorry, moved out of the way and commended him for asking me so nicely.

[countrymel]

I guess it depends on the tone of his voice.

It is quite possible (and I think we all know) to use polite language and still be extremely condescending/rude due to the manner of delivery.

A friend's child is exceptionally rude, even aggressive, in his manner of speaking/demanding toward others, but will throw up a mighty wail if ever pulled up on it - "But I SAID PLEASE?!!" an order is still an order even with a perfunctory 'please' tacked on.

You know your son OP, so only you know how he would have responded.

[MrsWidget]

If anyone sounds like they were rude it was the mum.