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07/02/2013, 11:11 AM
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#1
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Posts: 26
Joined: 5-December 12
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First time OP here! DS has always been fairly placid but recently he has starting hitting and pushing other kids. He is an only child but I take him to the park each day so he is not completely unsocialised. I have tried giving him 1 warning and then leaving if he does it again but it still happens nearly every day. How else do I stop him?
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07/02/2013, 03:15 PM
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#2
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Posts: 288
Joined: 5-October 12
From: Melbourne
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DD has days when she can be a bit like this (she's 23 months). I recently read somewhere to turn your attention to the victim so I might say something like this (DD often attacks her cousin) "Niece, please tell DD to stop" while standign next to niece and doing the extended arm "stop" action. Although at this age it might take a while to work, I also read somewhere that they just do not have much of a capacity for empathy at this age.
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07/02/2013, 03:39 PM
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#3
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Posts: 411
Joined: 12-September 11
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Close supervision and talking about 'using your gentle hands' when a situation arises that you think he might get frustrated or hit out. Discuss ways to say he is angry or frustrated with words - even just 'you look really angry. Are you feeling angry?'
So you are helping him recognise triggers and stop the behaviour, rather than punishing as a first option. Hopefully he can learn the skills to then prevent the behaviour himself. And lots of sharing practice talking about being a kind friend, liking people who are kind to us, hitting makes us feel sad, playing together nicely etc. Some people use 'you hit, you sit' so a person who hits gets time sitting with their carer with little attention being paid to them. Sort of 'time in'. Afterwards you can redirect. My sympathy. You can feel really judged by other parents at the park when you really are trying your best. |
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08/02/2013, 08:31 AM
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#4
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Posts: 26
Joined: 5-December 12
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thanks for the advice! I was starting to think that leaving immediately wasn't working as he just doesn't seem to care. I like the directing attention to the other child and gentle hands approach. I find it embarrassing when he does this and I'm becoming reluctant to go to the park when I used to love taking him. Hopefully it won't last!
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