[Satay chicken]

This is a part vent but also wondering how others cope?

So, I'm nearly 23 weeks pregnant - its been a pretty good pregnancy except for the exhaustion, its like nothing I have ever felt before, I feel like at 80 year old woman.

Anyway, work is really taking its toll - I commute 3 hours a day, that includes walking 4.5km's from buses to work and back. I get to work at 8 and usually can get out at 5pm but I find the days just so long especially now I am getting bad back pain. Right now, after a terrible day, I am so tired I have lost my voice and I feel like bursting into tears... I just don't know I how I am going to get through to the end of April like this... I also don't really have any friends at work so spend most of my days in silence, this just makes it that much harder...

How do others cope with long days?? Maybe I am just a lightweight...

[flear]

Working and being pregnant is hard. I am 31 weeks FTM and some days are a struggle for me more than others.
Is there a way that you can talk to your boss about either reducing your hours or working from home for one day?
I had such bad morning sickness that for the first 20 odd weeks of my pregnancy I couldn't work 5 days a week and had to have a sick day once a week just to be able to function for the rest of them. Is this something that you could do also?
How helpful/understanding is your partner? Mine gave me foot/lower back massages every couple of days and that helped me cope better as well.

It does get easier though!! Or you just get more use to it

Good luck with everything.

[carriesshoes]

I just focused on my end of work date and aiming for it!

Admittedly I finished up work 4 weeks before my due date, but one of the main reasons was that I don't have toilets on my floor at work. Going up and down emergency exit stairs when you can't see your feet, you need to pee a millions times a day, and you can't hang on for too long, really got the better of me!

[silverstreak]

You are a trooper Satay, that's a long commute!

I found the fatigue during pregnancy pretty bad. Towards the end I was falling asleep at work! I just hope I didn't snore!

Do you work at a desk / on a computer? I had bad back pain whilst pregnant. I talked to my manager and they organised a footstool, to ease pressure on my back.

I also had someone check the ergonomics of my work station and I ended up having the height of my desk and computer and the position of my mouse adjusted. I was also given a new ergonomic chair, which made a big difference. I don't know if that's possible where you work? Would it be worthwhile having a chat with your manager?

Go easy on yourself, it's hard yakka making a baby! Take as many breaks as you can and put your feet up as much as possible, although I know that's easier said than done.

[SqueakyBee]

*hugs* that sounds so hard, especially with a long commute!

I'm only in the early stages of pregnancy, but bad morning sickness has made working a nightmare. I'm lucky I have an understanding boss.

What is your workplace like for employee benefits? Can you talk to someone (your manager, your boss or HR, depending on the size and structure of your organisation) about how to manage this?

Before you approach anyone though, try to have a solution in mind. For me, starting a bit later has helped a lot because it gives me more time to rest in the morning.

Changing hours, going part time, working from home, or organising a temporary parking spot at the office to make your commute easier are a few potential solutions, obviously depending on your job situation.

When you talk to them, try to be clear and assertive. The current situation isn't working, and it is in their best interests to keep you since you are already trained in the job and (assumedly) plan to come back after maternity leave, meaning that long term they will retain someone they have invested in.

It is also in their best interests to ensure that you are able to be fully productive when you are at work, which in your current situation you are not - so highlight the benefits for them, and what you are willing to do to make it work for both you and your employer.

[Bunsen]

That's a hell of a commute! I was travelling about an hour each way when pregnant with DS1 including a 1km uphill walk from the station. I arranged with a colleague that she would drop me at the station at the end of the day and in the morning I called the office to see if any one was heading out to do a coffee run and could they pick me up on the way! I figured if you don't ask you don't get - meant that most days I didn't have to walk both ways, I did have to shout a lot of coffees tho!

Towards the end (SPD and a 4.75kg baby do not make for happy walking) it was too much so I finished up early - about 6 weeks before my due date.

My abiding memory of that time is walking in the door each evening, throwing my bra on the floor and crawling into bed, DH would bring me dinner in bed, I was exhausted!

[MrsLexiK]

Oh Satay, I have a similar commute to you but without the walk. I am in my car so that bit is much easier I feel (and with the holiday traffic still I am normally only averaging an 1 at the moment, getting to work at 8.45 and home by 6pm. I suspect in t he next few weeks that will go out to 6.30 though.

I started training the girl who was taking over my position on the 3rd Dec, she informed me after I had wasted basically Dec and Jan that this was not the job for her (this is after talking to her in Dec raising some points and me saying "are you sure this is right for you" and her nodding and saying yes of course it is I just take a bit to get used to things)

So now as opposed to just deligating working and keeping an eye on work, I will have to start training another person to take on my job again I hate training it is so stressful!

[deedee15]

Wow, that commute is impressive, as others have said, see if you can either reduce your hours or start working from home if it is possible.
Otherwise can you stay somewhere a bit closer for one or two nights a week?

[Natttmumm]

I feel for you. The exhaustion is tough. I finished up at 33 weeks. I couldn't do anymore

[envs]

Wow, that commute is impressive, as others have said, see if you can either reduce your hours or start working from home if it is possible.
Otherwise can you stay somewhere a bit closer for one or two nights a week?

This.

My folks were close by, and especially when they wree taking care of DS whilst I was at work, I was too exhausted to drive home, DH often worked late or away, so I just had spare clothes at my folks' and stayed there when I needed to