[JoMarch]

My DH is getting sick to death of hearing me whinge about how tired I am (he would never come right out & say it, but I'm getting the vibe...) and having a down in the dumps day today, so in need of a good ol' mini-vent about sleep deprivation (please feel free to join me!).

DS (6 months) is not sleeping through the night & never has, (and I know this is normal, and honestly I wouldn't expect him to yet!) but by around 3 months his sleeping improved dramatically & I was feeling pretty good . Then about a month or so later he started waking more at night again, usually 2-4 times. On a good night he'll wake only once (like he was between ages 3-4 months). And I know I shouldn't complain, there are a lots of mums out there who have it worse than this!

The last week or 2 I've been feeling so fatigued. Exhausted to the point where I feel like I'm barely functioning, and I know I'm not being the best mum I could be to DS. The house is a mess, I can't be bothered making plans to catch up with friends. Really feeling so over it. Even when I go to bed early I find it hard to get to sleep (never really had this problem before). Its like I'm so over-tired I can't break the cycle .

Previously I've done some expressing & gotten DH to get up to DS on the weekends, but my boobs get so engorged that I end up either wanting to get up to DS for some relief, or getting the pump out in the middle of the night. So I stopped bothering with that...

I know that things aren't THAT bad, I know people who have had it much worse. And I know that ONE DAY he'll sleep through the night & I won't feel like such a zombie anymore. I know theres nothing much I can do, no magic solution, and his sleeping will improve in time. But damn it feels good to have a vent... anyone else out there need to have a whinge??

This post has been edited by **Lucy**: 24/01/2013, 11:42 AM

[busymumof1&1/2]

Can I have a whinge too?
My DD2 is only sometimes sleeping through the night (she is now 13.5 months) and I am tired. I am back at work fulltime, up at 5 to get ready and the kids packed, full day at work, home again with the kids, and DD2 doesn't sleep until about 9.30pm.
My DH thinks I have it easy, as I don't do a manual labour job, like him (he sits in a forklift for Fs sake) and that it is easy to do the shopping, pick up various items on my way home, with both kids.
He did my head in yesterday, commenting how I am always whinging about how hard I have it, well then sit up and listen buddy. It is a logistical nightmare to try to do any sort of shopping with a 2 and 1 year old. Add to that they have been up since 6am (with a nap at childcare, of course) are tired, cranky, want dinner, want lollies etc. If I do go in, I am only after 2 or 3 items, so a trolley is overkill, so now I am carrying DD2, I have full hands with groceries, DD1 has just run away to look at something shiny, DD2 is leaning like the tower of PIZA, into the prime position for a booby snack, and I can't find my purse.
Yep, easiest thing in the world to do.

[JoMarch]

Oh busymum I can't imagine being at work full time with 2 such young kids! You must be exhausted! Hope your DD starts sleeping through the night more often for you.

[joy6328]

My daughter slept through the night for the first time at 8m old. We honestly thought she'd died or been kidnapped.

She's now 21m old and sleeps through the night maybe 3 nights a week. I mean from 7pm - 5am without waking up.

I hear ya. It's exhausting. During the day I resign myself to never actually sleeping like a normal person ever again. During the night I want to bash my head into the wall.

*sigh*

[Tesseract]

Lucy I know exactly how you feel. Whinge away! It is truly awful.

I didn't do any housework in DD's first year of life. DH and I decided that if I was getting up all night then housework and cooking were his responsibility. I don't think this is unreasonable.

Can you have a nap just once a day with your DS?

For our next bub I will definitely be setting up a side car cot. That way bubs can just roll over, have a feed, and go back to sleep? No need for you to get up and because it's immediate bubs doesn't fully wake so fall back to sleep quicker. I always found DD slept better when we co-slept, but I found it quite restrictive. Side car cot solves this! Everyone gets more sleep!

Just an idea I know how hard it can be to change things when you're so tired you can't function.

[tamjk]

My DH copped it yesterday from me, he's on holidays at the moment so I'm not cutting him any slack for being at work all day.

Tuesday DD was very late to bed thanks to a late nap and DH decided it was my job to put her to bed. That wouldn't have bothered me except it meant I didn't get to bed until nearly midnight, then had to be up every hour and a half tending to DS2. DS2 has a 6 hour stretch of solid sleep starting from 6pm and if I don't get to bed in that period of time my longest sleep stretch is 1 hour. Combine that with the fact that DS2 is up for the day at 4am at the absolute latest and I do not get a chance for a nap during the daylight hours thanks to older children who do not have day sleeps I was a wreck!

I ended up telling DH that if he wanted me up past 8:30pm at night he could dang well do the morning baby duties so that I could get some sleep!

[Rosiebubs]

The last week or 2 I've been feeling so fatigued. Exhausted to the point where I feel like I'm barely functioning, and I know I'm not being the best mum I could be to DS. The house is a mess, I can't be bothered making plans to catch up with friends. Really feeling so over it. Even when I go to bed early I find it hard to get to sleep (never really had this problem before). Its like I'm so over-tired I can't break the cycle .

Previously I've done some expressing & gotten DH to get up to DS on the weekends, but my boobs get so engorged that I end up either wanting to get up to DS for some relief, or getting the pump out in the middle of the night. So I stopped bothering with that...

I know that things aren't THAT bad, I know people who have had it much worse. And I know that ONE DAY he'll sleep through the night & I won't feel like such a zombie anymore. I know theres nothing much I can do, no magic solution, and his sleeping will improve in time. But damn it feels good to have a vent... anyone else out there need to have a whinge??

I hear you loud and clear, **Lucy**! My DD is also 6 months old, and we hit the 4 month sleep regression VERY hard bang on 4 months, and it hasn't gotten better yet. However, as this is second time round for me, I can assure you that this phase does pass. My 2 year old DS sleeps through the night pretty much every night, and I never believed that was possible as he was an atrocious round the clock feeder from day dot.

This is how I cope:
- I walk to the local cafe with the kids in the pram every morning and get a takeaway coffee. The exercise and coffee help get me going.
- Keep socialising. Apologise for being non compos mentis if you feel like you have to, but keep going along anyway. I find it much tougher to be exhausted on my own at home. If you go out with friends, all the babies entertain each other!
- If I need to have a whinge or a cry to DH, I do. However, I try to do it only occasionally (like, once a week), and I give him warning that it's coming before he comes home. Typically he grabs takeaway for dinner on his way home, then gives me a back rub.

ETA: Good luck! It does get better!

This post has been edited by Rosiebubs: 24/01/2013, 12:49 PM

[aphraell]

Can I vent too?

DD is nealry 21 months old and definitely hasn't been a great sleeper although we've had good patches (put o a couple of months at a time of sleeping through).

Current drama is we have made the move to a bed (actually taken side of cot). There are no tears at bedtime but it can take an hour for her to go to sleep and continuously putting her back to bed is exhausting!

she is sleeping through about 1/2 the time (the other times she just wants some more water and goes back to sleep so can't really complain). The issue is she is waking up at 4 or 4:30am EVERY MORNING. I cant do this! I work full time and I'm turning into a zombie. I think I prefer not waking/feeds with a day time start of something more civilised like 6am.

[cuddlebud]

Could have written your post. It's awful not having more than 3hrs sleep in a row months on end. My brain is mush, I look terrible with bags under my eyes and don't have motivation to do anything. You're not alone, dd is six months too - hopefully solids help but I don't think she's getting up because she's hungry!

[Zarlias]

I shouldn't have opened this

I am averaging 2 - 5 hours a night atm, but have been holding on to the fact that it's supposed to get better.