[claresydney]

DD was very upset after coming home from daycare this evening. She is only starting to put sentences together so she couldn't fully verbalise what was upsetting her (she is 2). After trying to comfort her, she clearly said to us suddenly in a forceful tone "you are too much work! Now go and play!" and pointed to the other end of the room.

She was obviously repeating something the carers said, either to her or another child in her room, as this is not a phrase DH and I use with her.

I don't know whether to bring this up with the carers tomorrow. They did not mention any incidences of misbehaviour on DD's part when I went to pick her up this evening.

I have been having some reservations about one of the carers. I have witnessed her losing patience with the kids on previous occasions (but I can't say for sure whether it was her who made this particular comment to the children today).

I'm only thinking of bringing this matter up with the carers because DD was obviously distressed by something which happened at daycare today. Or am I being overly sensitive, and pick my battles?

Thanks

[Bomber girl]

I would deinately bring it up. That is not right and it would be enough to make me look at other options

[SWMonkey]

I agree, definitely bring it up with the carers. Your daughter was clearly hurt and distressed

[AvadaKedavra]

Overly sensitive.

Kids are astute, but also imperfect. It may be that her being 'upset' and the statement she uttered were unrelated. Kids also have imperfect memories - even at 3 when they CAN verbalise, they rarely remember everything that happened in a day without prompts.

I would be wary about raising any complaints/concerns on the basis of a vague comment by a child, which may have been directed at anyone, or not said like that at all.

You could go and ask them if anything happened that might have upset her. Maybe a kid anatched her toy. But I'd do no more.

[Minxybug]

I would bring it up with the carers and also the coordinator/director. If you are still concerned I would then be contacting the relevant agencies (sorry bit of a blank the only one I can think of is the accreditation board)

Hope that you get some answers to this

[Bek+3]

No, I wouldn't bring it up. I'd just note it at the back of my mind and move on.

[in(s)ane]

Recently my son (who was 3, so a little bit older) told me:

"The new teacher at KU whose name starts with J told me I was a bad boy". He didn't want to go to preschool. A new (sub) teacher had been there the day before, her name was Jacinta or something.

I was livid. I didn't bother with the staff - I complained to the director immediately, she encouraged me to put my complaint in writing. While we were talking to DS he added "And Helen [another sub] says I am naughty". The director didn't need me to complain about that - she did it herself.

My son was put under the direct supervision of another staff member for the day, and the two teachers have been told they are not welcome back at this centre. I should add my DS has anxiety issues and sees a psychologist, so I know the damage 'harmless' but inappropriate language can do to a child.

I have no idea if any other parents ever complained about these staff members. My point is, I would make a formal complaint to the director and request the staff be counselled, at the very least. If the carer really is speaking to children in that manner, she is in the wrong job. If it's happening more or to other children, the director needs ammunition with which to fire her.

[blackbird]

Overly sensitive.

Kids are astute, but also imperfect. It may be that her being 'upset' and the statement she uttered were unrelated. Kids also have imperfect memories - even at 3 when they CAN verbalise, they rarely remember everything that happened in a day without prompts.

I would be wary about raising any complaints/concerns on the basis of a vague comment by a child, which may have been directed at anyone, or not said like that at all.

You could go and ask them if anything happened that might have upset her. Maybe a kid anatched her toy. But I'd do no more.

Actually kids have brilliant memories as they don't attach meaning to an event the simply remember it as they saw or heard it, the problem with children and memory is they can be coerced into doubting their memories and replacing them with something they think should be the memory, usually what they think an adult expects from them they will go along with (did a child eyewitness study for uni).

As the OP's child is obviously to young to be coerced into saying something like that she is recounting something most likely actually happened, I have always been good at picking up on my children's emotions to the point some have said its uncanny, its not, I just get them, maybe the OP gets her child enough to feel concern on top of what her child is actually saying.

I would mention it, however you do need to apply a bit of tact in doing so as not to get a defensive reaction.

[Niamh23]

Recently my son (who was 3, so a little bit older) told me:

"The new teacher at KU whose name starts with J told me I was a bad boy". He didn't want to go to preschool. A new (sub) teacher had been there the day before, her name was Jacinta or something.

I was livid. I didn't bother with the staff - I complained to the director immediately, she encouraged me to put my complaint in writing. While we were talking to DS he added "And Helen [another sub] says I am naughty". The director didn't need me to complain about that - she did it herself.

My son was put under the direct supervision of another staff member for the day, and the two teachers have been told they are not welcome back at this centre. I should add my DS has anxiety issues and sees a psychologist, so I know the damage 'harmless' but inappropriate language can do to a child.

I have no idea if any other parents ever complained about these staff members. My point is, I would make a formal complaint to the director and request the staff be counselled, at the very least. If the carer really is speaking to children in that manner, she is in the wrong job. If it's happening more or to other children, the director needs ammunition with which to fire her.

I really hope they didn't sack those women based on what one child said...

[trishalishous]

Id complain, especially if youve seen the carer lose her temper before