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> What's your favourite age?

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Kylie Orr
post 17/01/2013, 08:55 AM
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I love newborns.

Yes, I’m weird.

My favourite age so far is those brand spanking new bubbas. I’ve met many a parent who would well and truly trade the newborn phase for somebody a little sturdier, a little more interesting. Not me. I think that’s why I had four children – because they start off as the most amazing, adorable, tiny and helpless newborns. The koala cuddles, the completely random reflexes, the grunts, the goos, the poos, the squawking cries. The fact they don’t talk and therefore don’t talk back could be a significant part of their appeal.

I’m like a crack addict looking for the next hit – I want to inhale those babies and bottle them in a tiny corner of my heart. When I see a newborn, I HAVE to hold it. I need to physically restrain myself when in the company of strangers who may have a new baby. I’ve learnt to admire from afar and let the mist cloud over my eyes all the while ignoring the aching in my ovaries.

In fact I love babies, sleeplessness and all, until they hit about three.

Three has been my least favourite age so far.

It hit me like a busload of school kids on their way to swimming lessons. I was one of your cocky parents when my first child turned two. I thought, terrible twos? What a load of baloney. It’s because I am an insanely brilliant parent that my child is a reasonable happy two-year-old.

The parenting gods clutched their stomachs as they laughed hysterically and then gave me a three year old. It was a horror year. The crying, the screaming and yelling, the stomping and never ending misunderstandings. And that was just me. My darling three year old was ten times worse. It was a time of asserting independence and perhaps because he was my first, I didn’t realise he could do many of the things he was so insistent upon trying. He wanted to open and close the car door (no, you’ll jam your fingers, I’ll do it), turn on each and every light switch as we entered a room (no, you can’t reach, I’ll do it), try the key in the door (no, it’s a bit tricky, I’ll do it), cut his own sandwiches (no, you shouldn’t be playing with knives, I’ll do it) and build a nuclear reactor (no, nobody understands these things). Hindsight – that incredibly useless tool – tells me I should have said “go for it!”. I should have had the kid stitch wallets and set up a stall at the local market too. Instead I spent most of my time taking over whatever the task was so it could just get done. And done fast. In my defence, I also had a one year old and was perpetually in a hurry to get somewhere: get home, get the baby fed, get the washing on… So I learnt the painful way that three year olds who are determined to try new skills with a parent who doesn’t allow them such freedom, will and do rebel. In a loud way.

I’ve had two subsequent three year olds since the first. It’s still a completely and utterly abysmal age, in my eyes, but I’ve learnt to loosen the apron strings and grant them some independence. It means for slower and sloppier vegemite sandwiches but it also makes for a more peaceful house. Less screaming means we can see the cuteness that still shines through on occasion in a demonic three year old.

And as the youngest turns two (or “turns crap” as my husband says), I am realising that she has peaked early. I’ve never seen a tantrum like it. Stiff board defiance and hysteria that could last hours if we let it. Tantrums are not new to me but these have the velocity to power a small nation and are earlier than I’ve experienced. Please tell me this means three will be bliss for us?

As they grow older, I am appreciating something about each age. Before I had children, I found 7-12 year olds quite irritating. They were no longer cute like babies or preschoolers, and often started edging towards smart arseness. Now I have two in that age category I am roaring hallelujah! They can dress and feed themselves, they’re independent enough to make my life easier but remain respectful and are still malleable. They appear to like their parents most days. It is a joyous time.

Maybe we could find a scheme that shares children around – I’ll have them as newborns and pass them on to the next person who loves 2-5 year olds, then I’m happy to have them back for a while. Teenagers are on the horizon, and I am reserving judgement about the trials that phase will bring. I’m sure we could recruit someone who’d take a teenager over a newborn though.

If I worked for Disney, I might say that each phase has its pleasures and challenges. But I remember that three year old year and I don’t work for Disney. If I could swear, there would be a string of profanities here to describe that phase in my parenting career. Thankfully, it doesn’t last forever. And they may eventually go on to have three year olds of their own. Suffer in their jocks.

What’s your favourite age so far?

Kylie

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Frau Farbissina
post 17/01/2013, 09:03 AM
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LOVE newborns and babies. I was lucky enough with both of mine to not have issues with reflux or other things that can make life a lot harder at that age. I find toddlers a lot harder. Age 4 was a turn around age for DS1.
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glasnost
post 17/01/2013, 09:10 AM
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I have a three month old and I love this stage. Still a cute little baby. He will fall asleep on my chest and his downy little head still smells so sweet. But he doesn't cry as much and he will respond with smiles when I sing to him and as for the cooing... wub.gif He doesn't want to negotiate EVERY decision I make and he is so portable. I can put him down somewhere and know he will still be in the same place in ten minutes. I don't yet have to constantly worry about him putting something into his mouth and choking or climbing up to the stove and pulling a hot pot over himself. Even the poos are OK at this age.

My eldest is only four and a half though so I am only comparing to toddlers/preschoolers.
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LoT
post 17/01/2013, 09:13 AM
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I agree, I love newborns! Love that they hold onto your fingers and stay where you put them!! hehe. I hated the 1-2 yo age. Unreasonable, mobile, mischievous creatures! 2 and beyond has been surprisingly good.
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lilybet
post 17/01/2013, 09:15 AM
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I love them all (well up to 20 yrs anyway, lol), but I just get all soft and gooey with newborns and up to about 12 months.

I think my favourite age though would be about 4-9 months, where bubs are still dependant, they wrap those little chubby arms over you, and look at you with those gorgeous adoring eyes.

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**Xena**
post 17/01/2013, 09:17 AM
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Cobwebs are the new black!
I can honestly say I don't have one. Every stage so far has had its amazing upsides and it's not to pleasant moments.

Newborns are cute and don't move when you put them down, toddlers and their funny little unsteady walks and discovering words, 3-4 year olds with their comic questions and face pulling, 5-6 year olds starting school and making friends, 7-8 year olds becoming people wanting to know more about the World. That's where I have to stop because my eldest is 8 biggrin.gif

Love them all and wouldn't trade one stage for the next wub.gif
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Bluenomi
post 17/01/2013, 09:31 AM
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I love newborns. Babies are the best, I start losing interest around 18-24 months, not fond of toddlers and can't stand school ages kids.

Babies are so small, cute, cuddly and most importantly can't argue back (can you tell I've got a 2 going on threeager wink.gif ) I could cuddle a baby all day which is good because sometimes I had to with my own.
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tres-chic
post 17/01/2013, 09:44 AM
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"Hell is other people," Jean-Paul Sartre
I like newborns too but none of mine were good sleepers so this period was often difficult for us, especially with DD (child number three's) reflux added to the mix. I find toddlers very hard to manage.

So for me at the moment it's around four, where they're toilet trained (mostly) can dress and feed themselves without too much intervention (mostly) and I don't have to lift them much anymore. (My back is never going to be the same).

At 3.5-4.5 they're young enough to still be at home, but can independently manage a range of activities (colouring, puzzles, swimming, etc.) and their language is developing too so you can really start to get to know them on a new level, and it's still safely before all the demands of 'big school'.

But newborns, yes, every time I see a new baby announcement and the accompanying divine picture, I think, one more, just maybe...

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Rosie R
post 17/01/2013, 11:35 AM
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I am for the first time experiencing the newborn period and it is so amazing! My 'lil one is just 5 months old and every day from day one has been precious and something I will think about with a warm heart for the rest of my life. However, this is where it becomes a little hard for me to decide on an age...I have step children and I wasn't around for the first couple years of their lives but from 2 and a half and up I would say that 7 years old (about grade 2) is a lovely age. Their communication skills jump to another level and they seemed to love having nice, engaging conversations....closing in on 10 seems to be a bit of a worry though sad.gif less engaging conversations occur and more peer influenced attitude creeps in....awesome (not)....
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Natttmumm
post 17/01/2013, 11:46 AM
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Favourite age depends o n the child for me. DD1 was just lovely from 8 months until 18 months.
Dd2 was the Sweetest newborn until around 1 yr.
Both horrible at 3. Worst age for me for both. This is now for DD2. I think b ack to her placid baby days and think where did I go wrong!!!
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