[Just the two of ...]

I'm sitting here at the moment, trying not to burst into tears but I know it won't be long until they start pouring down. My dreaded AF has just arrived and I feel like absolute hell.

I have been TTC for 19 months now with no luck at all. I know I should be thankful that I have 1 healthy DS when there are people out there who can't even have 1 child but at the moment I just feel like really hopeless and quite frankly I feel like giving up.

AF is so painful every month that I basically spend 3 days curled up on the floor of the toilet, with poor DS watching the portable DVD player which I feel absolutly terrible about. My doctor said there's not much I can do about the pain because I can't got on BC if I want to get pregnant.

I had a lovely day planned for tomorrow for DS and I but now that AF has arrived, all that has gone out of the window. It seems like everyone around me is getting pregnant and I don't know how to handle it.

I don't have anyone to talk to about this, so if you have read the above Thank You! I feel a little better for writing it down.

[CallMeProtart]

Good luck, hope things improve for you soon

[Sunnycat]

I'm sorry have you sort any advice from a doctor?

I think your feelings are perfectly valid and normal. I hope it happens soon for you.

[starsg]

Came in from recent topics but just wanted to say sorry you're feeling like this

Have you been tested for/explored the possibility of endometriosis? I know that can cause very painful periods, not sure if it may have some effect on fertility as well? It could be worth investigating further, I wouldn't be accepting that amount of pain each month as normal

Hope you can find some answers, and of course it's perfectly ok to cry if you need to

[~shannon~]

Yes it is okay to cry! I'm so sorry you are going though this. Secondary infertility sucks! I experienced it for two years and found no person in real life who understood my pain. I got all the usual comments about how I should be grateful for the child I had, and that I had no right to be upset when many women can't conceive at all..... Of course we are grateful, and cannot imagine the grief felt by those wanting a child... But that doesn't mean you can't grieve as well.
And It really is a cruel turn of fate when everyone around you is having their second or third baby while you are still struggling.

OP, I am sending you the warmest of hugs at this time, as well as a bundle of hope that it will happen for you soon. Don't lose that hope... just when I thought it was all over for us, and I had come to accept that we would only have one child, after two years of trying we fell pregnant again. And now look at me... Getting ready to give birth to my third baby. I hope this is the future that awaits you too!

[with the goo goo...]

Is it okay to cry? By geez, I hope so!!

I second the idea of getting some investigations done as to what is causing the pain.

[Leafprincess]

you have every right to cry.

My friend had awful AF after going down the hormone injection path towards having a baby.
Anyway, she found taking a magnesium and omega 3 supplement eased her symptoms each month.

If you are uncomfortable taking supplements, maybe increasing foods rich in magnesium & omega 3 might help?

All the best.

[bokbok]

Came in from recent topics but just wanted to say sorry you're feeling like this

Have you been tested for/explored the possibility of endometriosis? I know that can cause very painful periods, not sure if it may have some effect on fertility as well? It could be worth investigating further, I wouldn't be accepting that amount of pain each month as normal

Hope you can find some answers, and of course it's perfectly ok to cry if you need to

This is exactly what I was thinking. Have yourself referred to a fertility specialist and see if they will do a laparoscopy to check for endometriosis. You shouldn't be in THAT much pain from AF. Plus if you do have it, it can affect you getting pregnant - I know because I have just been through it all!

I have been TTC#2 for 4.5yrs so I totally understand the emotions you are going through!

There is also a secondary infertility thread within this section - please come over there and have a chat with people who understand. You would be most welcome.

It is more than ok to have a good cry...this is such a hard journey. Do you have some strong pain killers you can take so you can still enjoy your day with DS? What does your DP/DH say about it?

Hope you feel better soon xxx

This post has been edited by bokbok: 14/01/2013, 09:45 AM

[Just the two of ...]

Thank you to everyone who replied, it was great to wake up this morning and read all the lovely things that you wrote I was up all night in pain but luckily the painkillers kicked in enough so I could take DS to the park for a picnic lunch.

I saw a doctor in November who said that everything looks fine and she can't see any reason why I can't get pregnant. She has referred me to see someone else but I am still waiting for an appointment.

She took some samples and it came back that I had BV so I was put on medicine for this. Does anyone know if that can cause infertility? I didn't get the results for over a month, so I assumed that it can't be that bad and she didn't really say anything when she rang me on the phone to tell me.

Sorry I haven't replied to everyone personally, I am typing this on my Ipad while my DS sleeps on my knee, I like to cuddle him extra during this time.

This post has been edited by Just the two of us: 14/01/2013, 10:48 PM

[libbylu]

hugs to you.
I also struggled with secondary infertility for almost 3 years in the end and it is heartbreaking. I shed many tears when AF arrived. In the end we turned to IVF.
Does Neurofen not help with your period pain?
Good luck for next month.