[WithSprinkles]

The guardianship/will thread got me thinking about when we wrote our wills. One thing I found extremely difficult was deciding whether to be cremated or buried and where I would want my remains to be buried/scattered. A year later and I still have not made a decision..!

I like the idea of having a grave for people to visit.. I also don't mind the idea of scattering half of my ashes somewhere I love and have the other half in an urn or something for my family to keep so that part of me is with them still...but then what would happen when my children and their children eventually pass away? I don't think my great great grandchild would want the ashes of their great great grandmother hanging around!!

I have a couple of songs that I would like to be played at my funeral along with maybe a slideshow of pictures of my life. I would like the same flowers I had in my wedding bouquet on my coffin and would prefer people donate to charity rather than buy any extra flowers.

Have you discussed your wishes with family members? Would you prefer to be cremated or buried? Where would you want your remains to be placed? Have you made any special requests for your funeral?

EDited to add paragraphs - typing on iphone

ETA: I know it won't matter because I am dead, I just like the idea of making my wishes known so my family doesn't have to deal with difficult decisions once I'm gone (or minimize them a little!)

This post has been edited by VanillaIcecream: 05/01/2013, 01:06 PM

[BadCat]

If at all possible I want no flowers, a cardboard coffin, and to be buried in a forest and have a tree planted on top of me. No memorial plaque, no religious aspect, no fuss. And play whatever song suits those who I leave behind. I won't be able to hear it anyway.

If that's not possible then I just want the cheapest, no fuss, funeral that people are comfortable with. I'd prefer to be cremated and scattered inear a waterfall than buried in a fancy coffin though.

This post has been edited by BadCat: 05/01/2013, 12:28 PM

[Allie_D]

I was only talking about this with family last night.

I want a New Orleans Funeral March at my funeral. Right through town. My family think I'm joking... I'm not

Being serious for a moment though, my Grandfather passed away 2 years ago and his wishes were to be cremated and his ashes scattered somewhere (he didn't care where they went) and he didn't want a plaque. So they ended up going to my Aunty who lives in another state, and she scattered them somewhere down there. It kind of makes me sad that we don't have a 'place' to go to.

[AntiBourgeoisie]

I'd love an open air cremation - but it's not allowed in Australia, and rarely allowed anywhere.
I'd like to second BadCat's thoughts. If I'm dead, well, I'm dead. What do I care? Funerals are about the people left behind having a way of publicly grieving. It's not really about the dead person.
I do understand that some people feel quite strongly about their funeral. There was a thread on EB a whole back about a lady dying of cancer (an EB members MIL perhaps) dictating where to have the wake, where she wanted to be buried, who had to drive when and where to do all this... In that case, I think a sudden confrontation with your own mortality and fears of being forgotten dominate - its not about the funeral per se. I think those feelings are valid and I certainly wouldn't begrudge it if a family member of mine made difficult requests about their funeral. But I wouldn't want to do that to my own family. And if I made a 'last promise' to someone about their funeral/remains, I would do everything in my power to carry it out. Because I'm a bit superstitious about stuff like that.

[cira]

I'd like as much of my body as possible to be donated to organ transplant and/or science.

My family can choose to grieve as they wish but hopefully they will follow my wishes in regards to my body and be okay with a service without a body.

[Sweet like a lem...]

Cremation but I don't want my ashes kept. The idea totally creeps me out.

[LynnyP]

Not my decisions to make. If it was, as the council frowns on human remains in the rubbish colleciton, I would want the absolute cheapest available, after all useful parts have been removed for reuse, experimentation or merely entertaining medical students and they prepare for a tough life. But really it is up to how the people behind want to mark my death/life.

[lifehacker]

,

This post has been edited by lifehacker: 09/02/2013, 10:25 PM

[GaugeousBosons]

after all useful parts have been removed for reuse

That's what P and I want done, firstly.

After that, we have....unconventional wishes for the funeral itself.

I'm happy to divulge, but I'll upset a bunch of people and probably be told I'm making it up and it's in bad taste.

So basically, P and I want it in the spirit of how we live.

[la di dah]

I want my organs donated.

Then I want whatever is left put in a wood box and buried. I do not want to be cremated. My DH knows I have a horror of the idea of being cremated.

I would ideally like a small stone with my names (all six names, please) and dates, and then a tree planted over me. I don't need a huge garish stone but I'd like a stone because I'm a genealogist's daughter and I like the idea of great-grandkids being able to look up what my middle names are should they so desire.