[swimmingalong]

If you'd booked a playcenter or the local pool or similar and people turned up to drop their child off for the party and they hadn't rsvp'd at all....

Would you tell the parent that because you hadnt been rsvp'd and therefore didn't expect the child to come that the parent would have to pay for their own child?

Would you still do lolly bags for the kids who hadn't rsvp'd or tell them that mummy didn't tell me you were coming so I didn't make you one?

[Halcyon~]

I don't have it in me to turn them away.
I always do extra lolly bags just in case

[swimmingalong]

to expand: given that in the venting thread a lot of people said it was rude not to rsvp, I was wondering how many people would actually draw a line in the sand and let it be known that these sort of people are rude?

[swimmingalong]

to expand: given that in the venting thread a lot of people said it was rude not to rsvp, I was wondering how many people would actually draw a line in the sand and let it be known that these sort of people are rude?

[robot sm]

I don't think I'd do anything to potentially exclude the kids like not giving them a lolly bag or telling the parents to pay themselves, but I would probably mention to the parents - 'oh! I didn't get your RSVP!'

[Therese]

I would never say anything to the kids, I would just make extra lolly bags. As robotsimone said I would probably say to the parent something about not getting their RSVP but I would never say anything to the child. It's not their fault their parent didn't reply.

[baddmammajamma]

I doubt I will ever find myself in this situation because we know all of the parents of our children's classmates, and I've been known to hunt down wayward RSVPs. I like to know my numbers!

HOWEVER, hypothetically speaking, if I had no RSVPs:

I would never say anything to the kids, I would just make extra lolly bags. As robotsimone said I would probably say to the parent something about not getting their RSVP but I would never say anything to the child. It's not their fault their parent didn't reply.

[SplashingRainbow...]

There are ways to let people know their behaviour is rude, without exhibiting rude behaviour yourself.

I think both proposed behaviours in your op are rude and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing either. If you were truly out of party bags you could very genuinely apologise to the guests you weren't expecting by explaining that you only catered for those who replied, however I would hope I would have plenty of spares.

[RatbagBob]

What Therese said. I'd never take it out on the kids, it's not their fault.

[Funwith3]

Id never say something to the child... but then again I'd never let it get to that point. If I haven't heard back from parents I contact them myself and establish whether or not the child is coming. If I hadn't heard anything, I think I'd make them a lolly bag just in case.

Upon their arrival id probably be a smarty and say "oh its good your child could make it, I didn't know whether or not she was coming!!" I think that would get a subtle message through!