[Perrypie]

As a mum of an only child I sometimes feel like I'm treated differently by other mums (not always). Almost as though I'm only half a mum. Am I being ridiculous - as in, is it just my imagination, or have any of you parents of only children felt similarly?

[Maple Leaf]

I am an only child (but have 2 kids myself) and have experienced people telling me that I'm not part of a real family as I had no siblings.

Complete and utter idiots. Try to rise above it.

[TillyTake2]

I'm currently a parent of an only child but we do plan to have more.

I can only give the perspective of what I think when I see parents of only children... I don't think they are "half" parents or look down on them or anything but I do sometimes wonder if they had an only child by choice or circumstance

[Mishu]

I can only give the perspective of what I think when I see parents of only children... I don't think they are "half" parents or look down on them or anything but I do sometimes wonder if they had an only child by choice or circumstance

And therein lies the assumption that there is something odd/wrong about only having one child, that there must be a reason for it.

I have one child, by circumstance. I would have loved more. But I don't look at parents with 2 or more kids and wonder, did they choose to have that many or was one of them an 'oops'. It bugs me when people question why I have only had one; I don't ask them why they had two or more. A parent is a parent, regardless of whether you have one, a dozen or look after a child not born of you.

OP, I think I understand what you are saying. I have received a few 'oh, it must be easy with just one' from some I meet. I think I was far more tolerant of these comments when I was younger, I get shirty now that I am old and grumpy lol.

[haras1972]

I'm a mum of only one child, and I'm not happy about that, would love to have more but am slowly working towards accepting this is it.

I have felt some things etc from others, everyone I know has 3+ kids, but I'm also realising that I'm seeing that through my own prism of not being happy.

I think I'm over-interpreting/amplifying what is really not there, and it's my negative thoughts that I'm actually hearing, not other peoples.

Not saying that you are unhappy with having an only child, that's just my experience.

[Brrrroooce!]

I have thought at times that people view having only one child as "Parenting Lite"

Comments like "how can you be tired" and "wait till you have another one" (especially when you're not having another one).

[lucky 2]

I have one child (and no more for me) and I did tend to feel this more when dd was more dependant (she is 8 now) as I could see the heavier work loads of my friends who have more than on child and feel the comparison with myself, less of a workload.
I did get some comments (one child is a hobby!) but I really think it was mostly me who was doing the comparision and finding myself wanting.
I don't think of it much now.
Actually, I did think of it this morning in school assembly,
I was thinking of how the parents of 2 or more kids tend to be more prominent at the school, they can be more visible, be more active across many areas.
I supposed this was because they are often at the primary school for longer than 7 years (with 2 or more kids moving through) and get more contact with different teachers and parents.
It made sense to me.
I know less of what is going on probably because of this but I'm ok with that.
I think it is quite different having one to having more children in all sorts of ways, obvious and subtle.
I try to enjoy my lighter workload (though that doesn't mean it is always easy, I wish it was) rather than feel "less".

[Perrypie]

Thanks for all the responses so far. I just wanted to add that I often feel that people want an explanation as to why I've only got one. I've actually been asked why. I agree with Mishu, I don't ask others why they've had 2, 3, 4 or more kids. I guess I'm being a bit precious over being asked why. I just don't like talking about why.

[Saecularis Angel...]

I get a lot of comments about how selfish I am and how much damage this is going to do DD.

I wish I were imagining it!

[TillyTake2]

And therein lies the assumption that there is something odd/wrong about only having one child, that there must be a reason for it.

No my assumption isn't that it is odd/wrong. Just that it is unusual.

For example, if I meet someone who tells me that they have a 16 year old, a 14 year old and a 6 month old I may wonder if the 6 month old was a surprise. It isn't "wrong" that they have a large gap, just unusual. I'm not "judging" having one child (or a large gap) as right or wrong, good or bad, I'm just observing. FWIW I would obviously never actually ask or say anything!