[dr superfruity]

Hi all,

I have my first mother group meeting next Tuesday and then another one the following week and then next one in the new year. Hubby will be most likely to go to the one in the new year as I will be back at work. Would you take him to the first two sessions so everyone already knows him or is it weird as it will most likely only be girls swapping war stories...

I was wondering if I should go on my own for the first time and ask how everyone would feel about him being there the second time... and then have him come with me the second time and go alone the third time..DH is very funny and social. has worked as an ECT and been around lots of babies and mothers and female colleagues... so he knows how to behave himself and is comfy with bf mothers.

I am just worried that

a) some mothers will say they would feel uncomfortable with a man there and

b) that if he doesn't go he will go insane with no real outside contact to other parents with babies...

wdyt?

Eta any ideas on howmto find a local Dads groups? (Sydney northern beaches)

This post has been edited by dr superfruity: 07/12/2012, 09:54 AM

[niggles]

Congrats on the new arrival.

Is he worried about going nuts and having no contact with other parents? Does he want to attend a group of mothers? If yes, I think he should go as early as he likes. He can share his own war stories and decide whether being the only Dad in the group is going to bother him.

As an alternative, if the idea does not appeal, have you thought about looking for a local Dads group?

[PurpleNess]

Id suggest going to the first one on your own & explaining your situation to the other mums & suggest he come the following week as he'll be the main caregiver in the new year.

Once of our mums has gone back to work & her DH is looking after her daughter, we've extended the invite to him but as yet he hasn't attended. Our circumstances are a bit different as we'd met him before etc.

[Ianthe]

I think Dads should be more than welcome if he is comfortable going.

We had a Dad come along to Mums Group but that was after we had known each other for a while. I had issues with him coming, not because he was male but because he was a d***head.

[Goggie]

We had a dad attend our first one. No issue here! It was nice to see actually

[junebuggy11]

We didn't have any dads for those first few meetings, when you sit awkwardly around in a circle and try to practise BF in public, but now we have a pretty even showing of dads at our gatherings. In particular my husband only works part time, so is often there for park afternoons, and another time shares in that he works 3 days and mum works 4, so we see him as much as we see her.

I think it's great.

[chicken_bits]

We had a dad tag along with his partner and daughter to the first couple of sessions for our new parent's group. I thought it was great! It was really nice to see such a loving caring partner so interested in finding out information and it was great to get a father's perspective on things.

He doesn't come along any more, but I would be happy if he still did.

[Honey1331]

All Dad's were invited to the our first mothers group, and they popped in here and there after that.

We always have an open invite to the Dads (now that we organise our own catch ups), and considering we have a SAHD in our group who actually organises most of the catch ups, it'd be a bit awkward any other way!

[Rachaelxxx]

To be totally honest, our first Mothers Group session was spent discussing our birth, breastfeeding, bleeding all those sorts of things. I would not have appreciated a dad there at all. I have great relationships with all my girlfriends husbands, but I don't think the first session of a mothers group is one of those times dads need to be present.

[Juliette3]

Our mothers group actually had quite a few dads - one was a stay at home dad, one was a shift worker, one was a retired second marriage dad. We ended up calling it 'parents group' not 'mothers group'! We were never embarrassed talking about birth, breastfeeding, bleeding etc with them around as they had all been there through it all with their wives. I would say their presence definately added positively to the group. I would encourage your hubby to go - he may be able to get other dads involved too and it is better for everyone. We were also on the Northern Beaches.