[Wildence]

might be in a wrong forum,

but just wondering.

do partners change??

my partner is super stubborn and loves playing his PC games, if i ask him to do something for me while he is playing, ill get nasty replies and eye rolling.
he is just not reasonable when he is playing his xbox (this is how he spends ALL his free time)

i feel super bad and guilty for bringing a child into this world when there is so much unnecessary bickering and shouting.

he ends up helping me, but the process to get there, is just so painful. once he starts being rude to me, i cant help myself but I start crying and start feeling extremely guilty for the little one..

every time i want to be a biatch, i always try stop myself, putting the baby first. if i am stressed, i believe they can feel it, and i love him too much already to make him feel that bad.

but yet my partner finds it fine, to bicker, and argue with me, knowing that unnecessary stress is not good for a little one. or does he just forget that i am carrying his son?

please no flaming.
and we do love each other, and we don't argue often, but when we do. it makes me feel guilty for bringing a child into this world.

[Sassy Girl]

My DH he went from being a nice, helpful partner who did about half of all household chores. He turned into something that resembles your partner now so hopefully your partner will do the reverse of what mine did.

[jayskette]

A child adds a new dynamic to a relationship. It does not change the person.

[sandoz]

Mine also went from sharing all the housework to playing games all the time and not helping, or sighing and complaining about it so much it was faster to just do it all myself...we're divorced

[Suz01]

Agree jayskette, my partner loves our kids, yet still works 6-7 days a week
Its just life for us.

Mothers in my opinion realise quicker the impact a baby has and sucks it up. Men, are so much slower (in our relationship at least.)

[pratique]

Mine stayed the same.

He always was good with housework, cleaning and general tidying anyway.

I have noticed that he is more understanding and open towards others. Probably due to the love one has for their own child.

I don't think having a child completely changes anyone. My DH still has some annoying habits that have always been there (as do I, I am sure!)

Good luck OP.

[bonnybabe]

I think you'll need to have a chat about the split of responsibilities, what is expected of each partner when the baby comes, before the baby comes. If he doesn't put limits on when he plays games, you'll just get the same eye rolling crap about changing nappies, or giving you a break so you can have a rest. Good luck.

[Unatheowl]

I don't think it changed either of us. Having a newborn especially is extremely stressful and any problems that were there are amplified by the lack of sleep etc that is associated with that phase. It certainly was a tough time for us. It has settled somewhat now, but in my experience it was a negative for our relationship, something we got through

[poss71]

You've got me thinking of the old saying, "A man marries a woman hoping she never changes. A woman marries a man looking to change him".

Set your expectations now, while you're not too tired/worn out/heavily pregnant/sleepless from newborn to put your POV forward. You can't change him but you can have a say in your relationship.

[BetteBoop]

A child adds a new dynamic to a relationship. It does not change the person.

I changed a lot when I had DD. I would say I'm almost unrecognisable to who I was beforehand.

Maybe your basic personality doesn't change, but your behaviour can and does change with big life events.

And sometimes that's enough.