[Jillian_10]

I will preface this by saying that I have some anxiety issues for which I am seeking professional treatment.

In February I will be returning to work, and my son will need to go into child care. He will be 11 months old when he starts going, for 3 or 4 days per week.

So far, everyone I know whose children have gone into centres for daycare have experienced illness after illness. Gastro, colds, snot, sick children and parents in general.

I honestly can't imagine coping with the same situation, for several reasons.

First, it would be horrible to have to see my son less, and only see him sick when I do get to spend time with him. I don't want to make him sick! He has, up till now, only had one tiny cold. No gastro or cough or fever. I don't want him to suffer being crook all the time

Second, neither my partner nor I cope well with inadequate sleep. Once I am contending with work as well, my ability to cope with reduced sleep will be compromised even further. I'm pretty sure a constantly sick boy will stop me from sleeping enough to remain mentally healthy.

Third, my work won't put up with me constantly taking time off for carers leave.

Aim wondering if family daycare is any better for avoiding this seemingly inevitable life of constant illness?

Is it inevitable that my son will be constantly sick in child care?

How do people cope with this?

[cinnabubble]

Some illness is inevitable, but it doesn't need to be ongoing. Expect a snotty nose all Winter, but that doesn't mean constant illness IYKWIM. I suggest you talk to your partner about sharing the days off when they come. Also, sleep deprivation is pretty much par for the course while parenting young children and working (ask me how I know) so you probably need to put in place strategies to manage this.

[caroldiem]

Unfortunately OP it is inevitable and if you avoid childcare now then when he goes to school supposedly it will be even worse. Unfortunately they have to get sick to build their immunity.

I can understand why you feel the way you do, for personal reasons of my own I am also very paranoid about illness in childcare centres.

The thing i would like to stress is if your child is sick PLEASE keep them at home, sorry but i get really angry when parents put their work before their childs needs, if your child is running a fever or is lethargic they need to be home not sent to daycare so they can infect other kids who may have a pregnant MUM (like myself) who unfortunately had their unborn baby die because a parent at my daughters daycare decided to send her kid who was sick (parvo virus) to daycare my daughter caught it gave it to me and my baby died...............

[Missy Shelby]

TBH I think kids being sick is just a part of life.

Although my kids are not in childcare they still get sick, I think it is kids that make kids sick not child care itself.

I know some kids that go to child care and yes they seem to be sick all the time but then I see other kids that go to child care that are not sick as much. I think it does depend on the individual child.

Good luck OP, wishing you a smooth and healthy transition in cc.

[katrina24]

Hi OP, I'm sorry you are feeling like this. I thought I would quickly share my experiences of childcare with your. My first DD did get a lot of ear infections in her first 18 months of childcare (she started just before 8 months) and we did have to miss work a lot. But, if she wasn't so prone to ear infections (anatomically) then she would have likely missed less childcare because the virus that often caused them would only cause mild cold symptoms in other kids I think. DD1 is now 7 and in her 2 full years at school and 1 at preschool I think she has missed well under 5 days due to illness (I don't think she has missed school at all this year and maybe one day last year with an ear infection). DD1 has had gastro once and it was very mild.

DD2 has been in childcare since 11 months. She has never had gastro. She has had a few of the regular early childhood viral infections but mostly these have been mild and not too much of an issue. She is coming up to 5 and I can't remember the last time we had to miss a day of work due to her illness.

I remember feeling very stressed, emotional and anxious before my DD started CC but the reality was far less awful than the expectation. I couldn't bear the thought of being away from her so much when she was just a tiny baby still (almost 8 months). She went into care 3 days per week and it had no impact on our relationship at all. We were and still are very close. You will still be her mum regardless of whether she attends childcare.

With regards to your comment about family daycare it may be worth investigating this option. Illness is only one factor to consider. There are a lot of factors to consider e.g., age of kids in care, set up of home and yard, transport while in care, how meals work, what happens if the carer is sick etc. The answer to these questions varies with different carers so it's important to find out. It ends up being a personal preference in the end as to whether you choose a centre or family daycare.

Best of luck.

[Schnitzelvonkrum...]

I was the same as you OP, when I went back to work hen DS was 8 months old. Yes, he got every bug under the sun, and yes, DH and I copped many of them as well. It was awful! But, we survived, and by baby number 2 we coped a lot better. by baby number three, there is hardly a time when SOMEONE in the family isn't feeling something LOL. It really is just life, and you have no option but to let it happen sometimes. If illness doesn't strike in daycare, it will in kinder. If not in kinder, then in school. It is a necessary part of growing up, and the more you can roll with the punches the easier it will be on all of you.

[jobo77]

Maybe we have just been lucky but we haven't had the constant illnesses that everyone says daycare brings. My kids only go 2 days a week though so not sure if that makes a difference.
Winter is pretty much what seems like a constant runny nose but they have never had gastro or anything serious. Honestly some of my friends kids that dont go to childcare get sicker more often than mine so I think some of it has to do with immunity and how the child copes with being sick. Some kids can still be totally fine, running around with gastro and temps and others will be flattened by just a runny nose (sounds like the men I know!).
I think all you can do is take it as it comes and try and have some plans in place for if the worst happens and your DS gets sick.
All the best

[redkris]

TBH OP you're probably going to have a shocking run of illness at some point whether your LO goes to daycare or not. If you see other people in your day to day life it's inevitable, whether it happens at one year old, or three years as happened to us this year....DS basically had a bug of some description every second week for 4 months, and gave them all to DH and I. One or two of the bugs were from daycare, but the rest were from family, friends or just everyday life.
All that being said, family daycare probably would have less illness floating around.

[jennywin]

I dont believe that you have to be sick to build immunity. To be immune from a particular bug, yes you have to have been exposed to it, but you can also have a good immune system and not catch everything. However the child care environment, closed, lots of touching, kids getting dropped off when sick, will tend to be more condusive to spreading bugs.

Having said that my kids have not attended child care, but after the age of 18 months on average get one gastro bug and 3 mild colds per year. At kindergarten it hasnt really increased. They get it from somewhere or other shops/pools/friends if you get out of the closed home environment. You can stall it a for a while, but its inevitable. Although the amount of bugs will increase with childcare because of the environment I think.

[casime]

My DS started in July at aged six months. He's had a runny nose for most of the first few months, but not enough to have actually ever missed a day of daycare. I've coped it worse, and seem to have had cold after cold all winter. I think it's one of those things you just have to deal with. You're going to have to deal with it now, or deal with it later when he starts school. You can't shield them from it forever.