[Gembac8019]

I'll be trying for a vbac but constantly have people saying things like ''oh you shouldn't risk it,'' ''if you risk it and something happens you'll only blame yourself''... ''i nearly lost my dd, so you SHOULD have a ceaserian'', ''what if your uterus bursts and the baby's head comes out of the uterus, it will be gasping for air'' - (that one was from the registrar at the hospital) ''do you want a dead baby or a brain damaged one?'' - (another one from someone else at the hospital), ''what if the baby gets strangled by the cord''?

aargh!!!! seriously?! I KNOW there are risks!!! there are risks for everything, i know that! Why do people have to try to put you off like this?! I'm 38.4 weeks and it's seriously doing my head in.

FWIW the obstetrician at the hospital has no problems with me trying for vbac. He said there is no reason for me not to try.

does anyone else get this?

[duck-o-lah]

I get the opposite. 'Oooooh, you've decided to take the easy way out *ahem* I mean, have a CS'

I don't think you can win sometimes, and when it comes to such an important and emotive decision as how you choose to proceed with your childs birth, people tend to have strong opinions. As long as your healthcare providers are happy, then that's all that matters. Perhaps you could ask these individuals what their medical qualifications are Hopefully at 38 weeks you won't have to listen to it for much longer! Be happy and proud with your decision, it's a really tough one to make. Well done and good luck!

[MrsWidget]

Yes I did constantly.

DS1 was an emergency CS and I wanted a VBAC with DS2. Every time I was told to go straight to CS I just said I'd like to try a VBAC and if it didn't work I'd have a CS. There was no medical reason not to try so I just staid firm in my response.

I ended up with a successful VBAC and it was awesome. good luck!!

[Unatheowl]

No not at al. People say all sorts of things. Besides, they're true.

If you are comfortable with your decision and have weighed up all the risks and benefits this should not bother you. People asked me what I wanted with my second and I'm sure they said these things. They're normal things to say. Meh. The only time I've even discussed my vbac is on this forum, no one cares. I didn't even realise there was a special term for it. Really and truly.

I cannot understand this vbac business like you're going for some sort of world record. Why is it even an issue or a big deal? Sadly the more you build it up for yourself and twist yourself up in knots about having it or not having it then unfortunately every tiny little thing everyone says will bring you to tears and quite frankly you're going to have a bad time of it, which is a shame. Let it go. Who cares what people say?

[farfaraway]

I didn't mind all the negative comments as it gave me ample opportunity to get my huge, pregnant, preachy backside up in my high horse and inform all these knuckleheads that they really had no bloody idea what they were on about. I was the one making the decision, I was the one who was exceptionally well-informed and I was the one making the decision. Bugger the naysayers OP, if you want to try, give it your neatest. With a lot of prep and a bit of baby cooperation, you will be soon sharing you VBAC success story with the world!

BEST of luck to you from one VBAC-er to (fingers crossed) another. Keep us posted!

[farfaraway]

No not at al. People say all sorts of things. Besides, they're true.



I cannot understand this vbac business like you're going for some sort of world record. Why is it even an issue or a big deal?

Sorry, saw this after I replied and just wanted to quickly respond. No, not all "things" people say about VBACs are true. Some comments are outright nonsense. Backed up with not a shred of science. So yeah, I am offended by uniformed statements about my choices.

And secondly, this whole "VBAC business like you're going for some kind of medal" is nothing of the sort. Fantastic for you that it was a simple exercise. For many women there are lots of very personal, intense feelings that go with their decision to try to VBAC. In lots of places it is a massive battle in itself to even be ALLOWED to attempt one (been through it myself). Undermining women because of the value they place in the method of their child's delivery is infuriating. It may not be important to you, but it is to some.

[HeroOfCanton]

''what if your uterus bursts and the baby's head comes out of the uterus, it will be gasping for air'' - (that one was from the registrar at the hospital)

WTF? I always knew doctors didn't have to be clever, but things like this confirm it.
I've not had a CS at all, and the only person I know who tried for a VBAC was very well supported in it, so I can't comment.
But I wanted to wish you luck

[Unatheowl]

Undermining women because of the value they place in the method of their child's delivery is infuriating. It may not be important to you, but it is to some.

Yeah, you know what is infuriating? All these women who create such a situation in their own minds about these birthing choices and then end up with PTSD because someone offered them a drink of water at the wrong time then sue medical professionals because they decided they had a "traumatic birth". It sh*ts me because its all so unnecessary and self created.

If these birth choices are so emotive and traumatic then perhaps some counselling is due well before birth to deal with these feelings, which, IMO are counterproductive and unhealthy. My vbac was not simple and straightforward but I also didn't carry any baggage along with it which made the entire thing easier for me. The only thing you can control is your reactions to things. If you decide you're going to get all het up about every single thing the only one you're hurting ultimately is yourself. That's why these threads infuriate me so. And there is always a crowd of similar minded people encouraging the person to carry on like a pork chop like they did. Crazy.

[tick]

Sorry, saw this after I replied and just wanted to quickly respond. No, not all "things" people say about VBACs are true. Some comments are outright nonsense. Backed up with not a shred of science. So yeah, I am offended by uniformed statements about my choices.

And secondly, this whole "VBAC business like you're going for some kind of medal" is nothing of the sort. Fantastic for you that it was a simple exercise. For many women there are lots of very personal, intense feelings that go with their decision to try to VBAC. In lots of places it is a massive battle in itself to even be ALLOWED to attempt one (been through it myself). Undermining women because of the value they place in the method of their child's delivery is infuriating. It may not be important to you, but it is to some.

Agreed.

OP I didn't even tell most people what I was planing for the birth of my second child but when I was 8 months pregnant the in laws got wind of it and ripped into me as though I was hell bent on killing myself and my baby. Accused me of being brainwashed and the like. FIL is a sugeon but yeah, perhaps a little misinformed. I'm normally quite polite to them but on this occasion I told them to keep their opinions about my uterus to themselves and to stay away from me until after the baby was born because I wanted to avoid developing per eclampsia and the like .....

Did they rock my confidence a little? Yes they sure did. I cried a lot about it. I thought I couldn't do it. When I was in labour I told my midwife I wanted another section. She told me to give it a couple of hours and then, sure enough, a baby came out my vagina.....

[AvadaKedavra]

WTF? I always knew doctors didn't have to be clever, but things like this confirm it.
I've not had a CS at all, and the only person I know who tried for a VBAC was very well supported in it, so I can't comment.
But I wanted to wish you luck

So you can't comment because you have no experience whatsoever in what you're talking about, but are happy to give a whole profession (which predominantly works tirelessly to improve people's health, usually for far less financial reward that those individuals would make in alternative careers) a backhanded slap about their intelligence on the basis of a comment that someone asserted someone else made?

Real maturity there.

Know what infuriates me? People who think they're SO clever because they read a few forum threads and web pages on birth and maybe had a friend who once did something.