[Livsh]

My BIL and SIL are getting married in November

Now my SIL is generally lovely, but she very materialistic and I really have nothing in common with her, she is the kind of person who buys a belt for $300 and goes on about what a bargain it is....where as I am the kind of person who doesn't even know what a belt is let alone how to use one!

The wedding is bringing out the PITA in her personality...an example

I'm not part of the wedding party (which I am more than happy about) - BUT, she told me that I have to show her what I will be wearing so she can "approve it"...The first dress I got was not acceptable and I had to go buy a new one.

She told me that everyone has to wear a fascinator or they won't be allowed in the restaurant - I think she was exaggerating here, but she went on at me for a hour when I said that I don't really like wearing fascinators, apparently they are a non-optional dress code.

My actual issue is with the hen party which I didn't really want to go to anyway, her friends are all very much like her and I really didn't fancy an evening discussing the nuances of gucci handbags vs prada...or something equally vacuous!

My other SIL (who I love) and I VERY grudgingly agreed to go along because it would be very rude if her new family didn't show up.

Anyway, I get an email today saying that...

All people attending the hen party (direct quote)

"must wear a sexy black dress, you have plenty of time to go out and buy one if you don't have one"

so...hackles up...

THEN it's $130 for dinner, topless waiter and 'other surprises'...that's before I've even had a drink, and trust me, I'd NEED to drink a LOT.


So EB, if you've made it that far with my white whine whinge about wedding bollocks, I need you to:

a) tell me to suck it up and stop behaving like a brat

OR

b) give me a good excuse for not going

I don't mind which side of that fence you sit on!

This post has been edited by Livsh: 02/01/2013, 09:48 AM

[MakeLoveNotBacon]

If you can afford it, I'm afraid I'm in the suck-it-up camp.

If you don't have a LBD, I wouldn't worry about that bit though. And get drunk before you arrive so you don't waste any more money on alcohol.

[casime]

I'm not part of the wedding party (which I am more than happy about) - BUT, she told me that I have to show her what I will be wearing so she can "approve it"...The first dress I got was not acceptable and I had to go buy a new one.

Tell her to send you a link to the dress she would like you to wear. Tell her you bought it. On the day, your child will accidently spill something down the front of it just as you are running out the door and you had to wear something else.

She told me that everyone has to wear a fascinator or they won't be allowed in the restaurant - I think she was exaggerating here, but she went on at me for a hour when I said that I don't really like wearing fascinators, apparently they are a non-optional dress code.

Suck this one up. But if a magpie attacks on the way to the reception and steals it for a birds nest, then what can you do? These things happen.

My actual issue is with the hen party which I didn't really want to go to anyway, her friends are all very much like her and I really didn't fancy an evening discussing the nuances of gucci handbags vs prada...or something equally vacuous!

Gastro. Very very bad gastro.

[Leggy]

Possibly, "Since you made me buy a second dress and a fascinator I'll never wear again, I can't afford all those things for the hen's night, so I'll just come to the wedding."

Or possibly just call on the afternoon of the hen's night with "a terrible case of food poisoning, I think it was that sushi SIL and I had...she's puking too."

You're definitely not the pillock here.

Ah, Madame Catty, you beat me to it!

This post has been edited by Leggy: 24/10/2012, 02:05 PM

[saraal]

how big will the fallout be if you don't go? how big a deal is the money for you?

unfortunately any excuse you make that doesn't involve your hospitalisation will not be deemed acceptable as clearly she feels Her Speshul Day should have global focus. So, have you been thinking about any cosmetic surgery? If so, now is the time to schedule it.

Otherwise say 'oh no, sorry, I can't make that date' and prepare for the bitterness that will ensue.

[niggles]

If I could afford it I'd just go along with it. If I couldn't I'd be very tempted to just tell her the truth. It's a bit rough to assume your friends can all afford the same lifestyle as you can and she may as well hear that sooner rather than later.

I'd email her that the night out is getting expensive and has she considered that some people may not be able to fit another purchase in their budgets and perhaps she might like to consider loosening up the dress code.

[ILBB]

There is a reason why I hate weddings and this just about sums it up for me. I would not have shown her my dress, have declined the invite to the hens night and told her how naff looking facsinators are! Well maybe not the last one, but really who wears fascinators unless you are the mother of the bride or off to the Melbourne Cup?

[AllegraM]

There is a pillock in your post and it's not you.

[saraal]

The problem with the gastro exc use is that you will probably still be up for the cost of the meal and for chipping in for her share too as the booking will have been confirmed.

Perhaps you could tell her your psychic has predicted explosive diarrhea and projectile vomiting for that date and you don't want to risk it?

[YandiGirl]

Another vote for 'this is why I dislike weddings'......but, she's family, suck it up unless you can't afford to do so.